


Charmed!

by LastWill



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Drama & Romance, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-26
Updated: 2015-10-28
Packaged: 2018-03-25 21:50:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 61,843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3826297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LastWill/pseuds/LastWill
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Draco Malfoy is the new Charms teacher at Hogwarts. Life is difficult as he struggles with his father and Snape, student crushes, Sex Ed, Harry Potter, a jealous Ron Weasley, cheating, an unseen enemy, teaching - and most stressful of all- falling in love with the newly appointed headmistress, Hermione Granger!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Interview

"You're a Malfoy. You already have the job." Lucius informed his son. "This interview is a formality, take my word for it."

Draco took a deep breath in as his father fiddled with the tie. He heard how breathing exercises could calm the body, but in that moment the extra oxygen did nothing to steady his nerves.

That morning he had barely been able to eat his breakfast, and while drinking a half-glass of pumpkin juice he had a mistakenly tipped his hand too far and watched with terror as the contents dripped on his shirt. Upon inspection it was just a few drops on the sleeve, probably no one would have noticed, but the thought of walking into a Hogwarts interview with a soiled shirt filled him with horror. Within a moment he was running to his room and stripping his shirt off to change it- that was when his father decided to step-in and give him some moral support. He was in obvious desperate need of it.

"I don't think the family name is going to hold much weight with Granger." Draco bitterly informed his father.

Lucius huffed through his nostrils as he re-clipped Draco's tie-bar.

"You know if you don't get hired Severus and I will raise hell." Lucius mumbled. "And surely the Granger girl knows a real wizard when she sees one. You'll be a jewel amongst garbage- Severus excluded of course."

"She's not a girl anymore, father, she's Headmistress ...She punched me once." Draco said, tight-lipped.

Lucius looked slightly taken aback.

"She punched you?" He repeated, scandalized.

"Yes. We weren't exactly friends."

"Well now she's got to hire you." Lucius hissed, helping Draco into his robe-jacket a little too roughly. "If she doesn't I'll ruin her- The Daily Prophet would go troll-frenzy! 'Headmistress of Hogwarts Assaults Prized Student'!"

"She was a student at the time too, dad." Draco said.

"No one has to know that…" Lucius mumbled.

Draco supposed his father was trying to be encouraging (in his own misguided way), but drudging up how odious Hermione Granger had once found him made him break into a sweat in his clothes.

"You'll get the job on looks alone if her snatch isn't as musty as her office." Lucius remarked with pride.

"Thanks father." Draco replied, deadpan.

"I've asked Severus to meet with you before your interview," Lucius informed him. He handed Draco a dragon-skinned briefcase. "I've made arrangements for all of us to have dinner tonight, so don't change out of your clothes when you come home."

"Alright, thank you." Draco replied. He was eager to get the morning interview over with but was slightly comforted to know his mentor, Snape, would meet with him. "I'll see you tonight."

And with a nod of his father's head, Draco apparated.

 

* * *

 

Draco never found the silly rule of not being able to apparate to Hogwarts more irritating than when he climbed into the boat overlooking the lake. Snape had been waiting for him outside of the school grounds and was sitting on the opposite end. He graciously took Draco's briefcase in his lap as Draco carefully climbed aboard.

Snape was wearing his usual black and looking as thin, dark, and gloomy as ever. Draco thought it odd his appearance never reflected the lavishness that his father pressed upon them both; even after his father's marriage to his mentor, Snape remained consistently vampire-esque. He was unchanged from Draco's childhood memory.

Well, that wasn't entirely true. His hygiene habits were a bit better. A bit.

"I better not get pond scum on my clothes." Draco hissed as he stood in the boat. "Or Granger will owe me a new set of robes."

Snape didn't reply as the boat disembarked magically. Draco remained standing, he didn't trust the seat of his pants touching the worn, wooden slat. (What if something stained his rear? He'd never be rid of his embarrassment.) They drifted toward the school at a steady pace and Draco adopted a wide stance that edged into Snape's foot-space.

"How are you, Draco?" Snape asked, his lip twitching in a suppressed smile as Draco wobbled.

"Fine." Draco replied. Truthfully, his nervousness was transfiguring into irritation as he tried to remain balanced. The idea of falling into the lake was worse than a few drips of pumpkin juice on his robes.

"Your father mentioned you seemed out-of-sorts this morning." Snape said. "You needn't worry. The other candidates for the position are, frankly, abysmal excuses for witches and wizards. Headmaster Granger is desperate to fill the position, I wouldn't be surprised if she asked you start tomorrow." He said folding his hands and resting them on his briefcase.

"We'll see." Draco replied. The knot in his stomach unclenched a little as he mulled over Snape's words. So Granger was desperate. He liked the sound of that.

"If you don't mind me asking, what influenced you to seek out this position?" Snape asked him.

Draco could be anything he wanted, really; his name alone gave him amazing prospects. It proved true since in a six years time he had worked in a variety of professions.

After graduation he had a lengthy internship in a spell-smithing research facility. Although interesting, he didn't quite have the creative talent to match the demands of the job, and he eventually became discouraged as his colleagues demonstrated their aptitude far beyond his own skills.

He switched into something more engaging and physical- within a few short months his father had pulled strings to get him into refereeing national Quidditch Matches. He had excelled and there was a certain prestige that came with the job; but he quickly found out that refereeing a game was nothing like watching a game. He enjoyed Quidditch too much to not participate in the joy of watching it.

He worked with dragons for a while, until an attractive woman laughed herself into tears at the mention of "Draco the Dragon-Tamer".

Then he became unemployed for a span of time. (He didn't really need to work), but the purposeless days did wear on him after a while. He was becoming dangerously bored with leisure. He was feeling more and more like a loser when people asked him what he was doing with himself and he couldn't fake a halfway creative answer. He needed a job.

Snape had come to the Malfoy Manor on the weekend coinciding Draco's visit and brought a story that the Hogwarts Charms teacher had a family emergency and would not be coming back to finish the year. Draco was just passing through the kitchen as his father and Snape, still in their pajamas, gossiped about the affairs surrounding the Hogwarts school.

A surge of belonging overtook Draco, and he knew in that moment that nothing would ever quite compare to Hogwarts. And so, he contacted the school and spoke with the Headmaster's assistant- Luna Lovegood (who was now Luna Longbottom! How shameful Draco should be single and Longbottom have a wife) and set up an interview.

Snape's eyebrows were creeping steadily up as Draco's silence grew.

"I'm not sure." Draco replied.

"Perhaps you should come up with a good reason, that is a common question for an interview." Snape said evenly. "What is your particular interest in charms?"

"...What should I say?" Draco asked.

"Did you want this job?" Snape asked him, an undertone of exasperation seeping through his voice. "You sound like you've just been obliviated."

"I'm not good at speaking about myself." Draco snapped. The boat rocked in a jolt as it began to drag onto the shore. Draco bent over and gripped one of the sides to steady himself.

"If you don't like speaking about yourself or what you know and think, you are seeking the wrong profession." Snape drawled. "You have to be comfortable speaking to people."

"Are you saying I can't do it?" Draco accused him.

"No, I didn't say that." Snape replied. But Draco could sense his doubt mounting behind his cold, black eyes.

"And if I don't get the job you'll think I'm an abysmal wizard." Draco said.

Snape opened his mouth to reply, but Draco had placed his foot on the edge of the boat and jumped to the shore nimbly before hearing his retort. He set off for the castle at a brisk walk, leaving Snape behind.

"Draco, stop!" Snape snapped.

Perhaps he'd been Snape's student too long, but he was unable to deny a direct order. Snape caught up to him and was walking with him towards the main entrance to the castle.

"You are a very competent wizard, you don't have anything to prove." Snape told him. Draco didn't look at him in the face but instead focused on the door to the entrance hall in the distance. "And if you don't get the job it is not a reflection on you but on Granger's questionable taste. We both know her history..."

Draco shrugged, but he admittedly felt better. Snape was walking side by side with him and thankfully his pep-talk was over.

The Hogwarts grounds was both familiar and alien and there was a charged air that he hadn't noticed while a student.

He didn't recognize the faces of the students that were occupying the hallways, but everyone seemed to take notice of him. A group of Ravenclaw girls stared at him before a disgusted look from Snape caused them to gasp, giggle, and look away.

"I feel like a zoo animal." Draco mumbled.

"Ah, how nice to be validated- I was told my concerns were ill-founded." Snape said, his lip curling into a sneer. His eyes were glazed over as they descended the long stairway to the Headmaster's office. "I've spoken to the Headmistress about the shameless amount of gawking this year. It's become quite a problem and is escalating to uncomfortable levels...I believe that certain staff members are encouraging it."

Draco doubted that a lot of students were ogling Snape. (Though he supposed it could be true given his own father had fallen hard for the man.) But the particular way Snape had mentioned 'certain staff members' had tipped him off that Harry Potter was somehow involved.

"Potter's part of the staff?" Draco asked, his own voice growing cold with disgust.

"Defense Against Dark Arts." Snape spat. There was an untapped layer of malice that shown in Snape's eyes as they stood outside the office door. "Apparently, working as a double-agent to the Dark Lord for years is only Potions Master worthy, whereas a few chance encounters in battle with the Dark Lord qualifies a Defense Against Dark Arts teaching position for life."

The jealousy and bitterness emulating from Snape wasn't lost on Draco, but he had his own feelings to deal with. To a lesser man the news of his archrival being on staff would put immense pressure to succeed on the upcoming interview- but to Draco it pushed him to elation.

"If Potter can be a teacher then I know I can be one." Draco huffed. He shot Snape a confident smile. All of his nervousness melted away and he stood taller. "Thank you."

Snape didn't smile, most likely the residue of 'Harry Potter' was still bouncing in his mind, but he did muster up a pleased hum for Draco as he handed his briefcase over. In Snape fashion, he slipped away with his black robes trailing behind him.

Draco licked his lips and lifted his hand to knock on the door, but as his fist came down the door was opened so quickly and violently that he stumbled.

"Oopsie, sorry about that."

Draco recovered and smoothed his robes under steady palms as Luna beamed at him with an innocent smile.

During school Luna had the reputation of being spacey and weird, and it looked like she, while residing at the school, remained connected to that impression. She was wearing what looked like two skirts with a pair of leggings and chucks, but he couldn't say she was entirely mis-matched. Her hair was tied back in a ponytail that showed off her signature beet earrings.

"I'm here for the interview." Draco informed her, his chin held high.

"Please sit down, would you like some tea? Or some whiskey?" She asked him. "Sometimes whiskey is the better choice." She told him as she shuffled towards a desk and pulled out a half-empty bottle out of a trashcan.

"No, I don't want any whiskey or tea- especially not one you've pulled out of a trashcan." Draco hissed. He didn't sit down, and he was getting impatient with this creature. "The Headmistress is expecting me."

"She's expecting a lot of people, and some people show up who are unexpected." Luna said, unapologetically. "It's a big mess really."

"And she hired you to... organize her schedule?" Draco asked her coldly.

"Moral support." Luna smiled. "But usually she asks me to handle parents. They never seem so upset after you give them the option to shout. People get angry because they're frightened you won't take them seriously."

"I can't imagine why." Draco mumbled, her beet earrings swinging as she poured a small slip of whiskey into a cup of tea.

"Are you sure you don't want any?" She asked him. "You always look so dehydrated."

Before Draco had any time to mull over what that meant, the door to the Headmistress's office swung open. Draco stood as stiff and tall as he could as Harry Potter walked out.

Snape had mentioned there was a "gawking" issue at Hogwarts, and Draco now knew why. The only physical imperfection Draco could see was Harry was short, but his good-looks made up for that; coupled with his celebrity status and he was pubescent girl's dream. Gone was the wild, unruly hair, geeky glasses, and teenage awkwardness.

Harry had a five o'clock shadow on his face that would have looked sloppy on anyone else, but on him managed to look charming. His hair was tidy, and his clothes were casual yet stylish, and as usual he held an air of confidence.

Draco looked down his nose at him and didn't offer a greeting as they paused briefly, sizing each other up. Their rivalry clearly had not ended.

"The Headmistress is ready to see you, now." Luna said. Out of the corner of Draco's eye he saw her trot across the floor and hold open the door for him.

He broke his attention off of Harry and slowly walked through the door.

The office was decorated in red-and-gold, and if he expected to find a 'woman's touch', he'd be disappointed because none could be found. Draco figured half the library had been moved in and was doubling as supports for the walls. Any area that wasn't covered in books had the portraits of the previous Headmasters, including Dumbledore who looked more pleased to see him than the current Headmistress.

Hermione Granger, like Harry Potter, had blossomed out of teenage awkwardness. The transformation between teen-Granger and Headmistress Granger was nothing short of magic. She was dressed professionally in a pencil skirt and a tasteful, but modern, blouse. The bushiness of her hair had been tamed to be full and wavy. She was beautiful- not 'buy this hand cream from our catalog' beautiful, but stunningly, classically, womanly beautiful.

Surely she was subjected to the gawking-issue? Draco didn't want to reenact the Ravenclaw girls he had met that morning, so he looked away from her and pretended to be interested in a owl sculpture doubling as a paperweight.

She moved a stack of papers off her desk and onto the floor before she waved him over to the chair in front of her desk.

"Please sit, Mr. Malfoy." She told him.

He had the distinct impression that even though their meeting was scheduled she was preoccupied with something else- as if he was interrupting her. She let out a little grunt of distress, as if she'd forgotten something, and he watched her rush to the left book-wall and pull a folder out. He smiled as her heels hit the floor in quick-clacks and she took her place behind her desk. She was back to looking official and very headmistress-like as she crossed her hands on the cluttered desk. Finally, he sat.

That was when she finally met his eyes and got a good look at him. She thrust out her hand for him to shake, and he shook it gently, taking note of her pink-painted nails.

"Headmistress at 29 years-old, that's impressive." Draco said.

"I looked at your resume and there wasn't any teaching experience." Hermione replied matter-of-factly, ignoring his compliment.

 _Of course flattery won't work on you_. Draco thought bitterly.

"I see you did work at London's Institute of Spellmaking, which translates into an advanced understanding of charms- however, that wasn't your last job and your job history since then has been erratic." She said, looking over a copy of his resume.

"I've been trying to find a job that appreciates my skills." Draco said.

"What skills do you have that would qualify you for the Charms position?" Hermione asked him.

"I'm a people-person, if you recall." Draco teased.

She didn't smile back. The memory of her punching him in the face drifted into his mind and she looked tired by his answer. Perhaps making the joke was a mistake.

"Okay, let us assume you have the job already, as you undoubtedly have been assured from Professor Snape." She sighed. "I need someone capable and dependable to teach this subject. You have to be available until the end of the school year, which means sometimes you're working nights and weekends, and you're living here and engaging with students in a positive way. I'm trusting you not to walk-out in the middle of the year."

"I understand." Draco replied.

"Can you teach?" Hermione asked seriously.

"Yes." Draco said. _"Maybe_." He thought. " _Probably with a little help from Snape_."

"What's the earliest you can start?" Hermione asked, turning to the stack of folders on her desk.

"Monday next week." Draco said.

Slips of her long hair fell over her face as she shuffled a few papers and handed him a handful.

"That is a list of different clubs. We're always looking for teachers to encourage after-school activities. Although it's not a rule, usually the staff helps out with at least one thing off the list." Hermione told him. "As you know, Snape is head of Slytherin House but he can delegate some of those responsibilities to you."

He had the job after two questions in the interview. Relief flooded his insides and he smiled.

"Oh, and we're also introducing Sex Ed this year." Hermione mentioned.

His smile faded like she'd punched it off his face.

"Who's teaching that?" Draco asked, scanning the club-list.

"Well...that remains to be seen." Hermione said thoughtfully. "There were no volunteers..." She said, her eyes boring into his. He didn't dare blink least she interpret it as a gesture to volunteer. "The staff came to a compromise."

"What sort of compromise?" Draco asked. He was already forming plans to make excuses.

"Whichever house loses next weeks Quidditch game teaches the class... because that's how we're solving problems now." she trailed off. She cleared her throat. "Gryffindor versus Slytherin- so either you and Professor Snape are teaching sex-ed, or Harry and Professor McGonagall."

Draco hated the idea of teaching kids about sex, and he was doubly sure Snape would make it a horrible experience for everyone on principle.

"Go Slytherin." Draco said, pushing back his dread. "So I officially have the job?"

"Yes." Hermione replied. She locked eyes with him and folded her manicured hands together. "I know what you're thinking- you think you got this job because of your father's and Professor Snape's influence. Let me make it clear that you're getting this job on my generosity."

He raised his eyebrows but didn't interrupt as she leaned forward. He was trying very hard not to look down her blouse.

"I'm Headmistress of this school." She told him. "Being a Malfoy doesn't exempt you from my authority- if I tell you to do something I expect you to do it. Your father has a difficult time understanding that, but I expect full compliance from you."

"I'm not interested in undermining you, I just want to teach." Draco informed her. That answer seemed to please her and she seemed to relax a little in her seat.

"The Charms curriculum has already been drawn up for this year." She said handing him a thick folder. "Here is your schedule, the only thing that hasn't been created is your tests and your end of the year exams."

"Not a problem." Draco told her, shrugging.

"I'm counting on that." Hermione replied pointedly.

 _Merlin, lighten up already_. He was in danger of rolling his eyes, but was saved by a knock on the door. Luna's head popped in.

"Headmistress," she sang, her eyes resting on Draco. "...That person you asked for arrived to do that thing you requested."

Hermione rose from her seat abruptly and grabbed Draco's hand, shaking it once more.

"Thank you for coming into today." She said hastily. He thought she looked stressed out as she swiped a strand of hair out of her face.

 

* * *

 

Snape and his father met him inside the steakhouse at their reserved table. Lucius hadn't held back on the festivities and had ordered two very expensive bottles of wine which resisted in a chilled stand next to their table. He had the waiter pour a generous glass as Draco pulled out his chair and joined them.

"You look pleased." Lucius told him.

"I got the job." Draco told him, flipping through the menu. He ordered the steak and the waiter cleared the menu's off the table.

"Granger might be a fool, but she's not an idiot." Lucius remarked with a smug smirk. "...Tell us about your interview."

"I'm not sure you could call it that. She asked me two questions, and I don't think she even cared what my answers were." Draco said. "Although she did mention you."

"Oh?" Lucius said, his eyes flashing. "What did she say?"

"She said you think being a Malfoy means you don't have to listen to her, and she expects me to do what she says." Draco replied.

Lucius clicked his tongue angrily and scowled.

"Tell her I donate enough money to that school to visit my husband whenever I please." He hissed. "He's a teacher not a criminal- visiting hours are for Azkaban."

Snape looked up at the ceiling as he drained the rest of his wine in one gulp; it was possible that this conversation had come up before.

"I'm not arguing for you, father. Especially not to my new boss." Draco sighed.

"It's not as if the students know I'm sleeping over!" Lucius seethed. Draco shook his head; once his father started on a complaining rant he rarely focused or heard anyone else. "She acts as if I'm waltzing into classrooms and causing a scene."

"...Which is precisely what you've done." Snape replied.

"What?"

"She asked you to leave, and you interrupted my lesson in protest to being sent away 'like a whore who'd just been paid'." Snape said with a small smirk.

"That was a year ago." Lucius said. "And it was barely an incident."

"You cursed Mrs. Norris when Filch tried to force you away and he went into a hysterical, sobbing fit." Snape informed him.

"Yes, it's all coming back to me." Lucius said with a disapproving glare. "Although I don't recall you stepping in to defend me against Granger's bad temper. Did you?"

"No, I was too busy trying to wrangle a panicked cat that was bouncing off the walls in a classroom full of highly unbalanced potions made by adolescent idiots." Snape drawled. "And you might recall telling Granger you 'refuse to listen to a lecture from a muggle your son's age', while vehemently denying her claim of being the headmistress. Amusing, but perhaps not prudent in hindsight."

"She was dressed like a muggle- I was throwing out a subtle hint that a proper headmistress of a wizarding school would aspire to looking the part. Merlin knows I have to be subtle, she's been over-sensitive to every criticism I've made." Lucius said, lifting his glass of wine.

"Is Granger always that uptight?" Draco asked Snape.

"She's in over her head." He replied softly with a note of pleasure.

"It's been delightful to watch her slowly crack." Lucius laughed.

"She's not as likable as Dumbledore was, and her ambition is outstripping the board's tolerance. Parents hate her." Snape smirked. "That's what happens when you think you know what's best for everyone and make no secret of it. She can't help herself, of course..."

"I suppose Sex Ed is one of her ambitious projects." Draco asked.

Snape's smirk soured and he spun his empty glass with two fingers.

"Yes." Snape glowered. "And despite all efforts, the Slytherin quidditch team this year has been mediocre at best."

"Granger can fire me if she wants, I'm not teaching a Sex Ed." Draco said firmly.

"Everyone expressed their malcontent through your words verbatim, she will deliver on that threat if you challenge her." Snape said. "However, there's no need to resort to that..." he trailed off and leaning in. "We're Slytherins. What we lack in skill we make up in cunning."

"...Go on..." Draco urged him as he leaned in.

His father, in similar fashion, leaned in. The three of them were nearly nose-to-nose with their elbows resting heavily on the table.

"The Gryffindors have a habit of keeping their broomsticks in their locker room." Snape said softly, his eyes flashing. "The locker room is protected by a padlock, but with the right incantation opening it would be childs-play."

"So if someone were to tamper with the team's broomsticks…" Draco began.

"A quick jolt to the left or right now and then could tip the fate of the game." Lucius said, grinning.

"Um…"

The three plotting Slytherins snapped their head at the waitress who was carrying a heavy tray with their dinner plates stacked on it.

"I can come back if I'm interrupting..." She said.

"That won't be necessary." Snape said, slipping back into his seat. The three of them grinned at each other knowingly.

 

* * *

 

Being a teacher was much more difficult than Draco imagined.

He thanked all the gods that his coursework had been planned by the previous Charms instructor; preparing for classes felt a lot like a mountain of homework that never gets done until the teaching day arrives. After he reviewed the content for the week, Snape was kind enough to give him pointers and sit through a few mock lessons.

By Monday morning Draco was exhausted. He ignored his fatigue as he pulled on his best robes and grabbed his suitcase. A stab of regret was growing in his mind- perhaps being a teacher was too ambitious? What did he know about teaching anyway? Simultaneously, he couldn't get Granger's voice out of his head demanding that he finish out the year. He also couldn't get her hair, nails, and the way she brushed her hair out of her face out of his head.

" _Shut up, brain!_ "Draco snarled, pushing the thought away. He was sick of thinking about Granger.

The Great Hall was filling up with students and all the staff members except him were sitting at the High Table. He vaguely remembered that teachers had to be there before breakfast started, and if that was correct then he was late. Still, no one seemed upset by his late arrival and it made it easy for Draco to figure out which seat was his. He was seated next to Snape near the Slytherin table, but his irritation grew as he spotted Harry Potter assigned to his left followed by McGonagall and Hagrid.

Draco put on an air of indifference as he strolled towards his spot. He purposely knocked into Harry's chair as he walked by, which caused Harry to spill the contents of his glass all over himself.

"Sorry Potter, I didn't see you there." Draco apologized with false sincerity. Harry was dabbing the front of his robe with a napkin roughly to soak up the spill. "You're so small."

"You did that on purpose." Harry seethed.

"Alright, you got me," Draco said sitting in his seat. "I was thinking maybe if I watered you a bit, you'd grow."

"You want to fight, Malfoy?!" Harry growled. He pushed himself away from the table violently.

"Gentlemen! A bit of decorum!" McGonagall hissed in her most dangerous voice.

There was an excited buzzing in the air as students strained in their seats to see the commotion. Granger was looking just as vexed as McGonagall, and while she hadn't spoken to him, Draco felt the weight over her condemnation.

Draco cowered slightly under her stern gaze. McGonagall's rebuke had a similar effect on Harry; he remained seated but his hands were clenched into fists. Draco was sure Harry wanted to throttle him with them.

"Sorry, Professor." Harry apologized. His jaw was clenched as he pushed in his seat and rejoined the table.

The tension defused when Draco set his mind to ignoring Harry and began to fill his plate with bacon. The Great Hall was noisy but quieted down once Hermione rose from her seat stiffly and approached the podium to begin that morning's announcements.

"Did you thank your daddies for getting you this job?" Harry goaded Draco in a whisper.

"Could it be more obvious you suffer from parent-envy, Potter?" Draco whispered back.

"That's not a real thing." Harry replied.

"Yes it is- you're quaking with jealousy." Draco whispered back.

"No, that's anticipation." Harry replied. "Gryffindor is going to sweep the floor with the Slytherin team in today's match."

" _That'll be all your broomsticks are worth once I've hexed them_." Draco thought.

A fantasy of the Gryffindor team bucking wildly on their broomsticks as Slytherin scored caused a smirk to come to Draco's lips, he hid it by drinking deeply from his tea as the announcements droned on. All of the students were eating breakfast and showed no indication of interest until the Quidditch game was announced. A few hollers from the Slytherin and Gryffindor table permeated the air in team spirit.

"Slytherin has only won only one match against Gryffindor, and that's because our seeker was getting over an injury." Harry told him. "I would-"

"Silence, Potter! I can hear your nasally bleating from here- ten points from Gryffindor." Snape hissed from across the table.

"I'm not a student, you can't take points away from me." Harry said in a harsh whisper.

"Can't I?" Snape challenged him softly.

"15 points from Slytherin." Harry snapped.

"Don't be absurd." Snape scoffed at Harry.

Draco laughed openly as Harry seethed. McGonagall was shooting them both a disapproving glare.

His joy, however, was short lived.

 

* * *

 

Draco felt panic, real panic, grip him as his first class arrived. It was a 4th year group of Ravenclaws and Gryffindors. He loosened his tie and tightened it three times as he went over his notes, his eyes darting to the clock every few seconds.

"Excuse me, sir?" A Ravenclaw girl spoke with her hand in the air. Draco nodded. "Do we have a seating chart?"

"No." Draco replied. "Sit wherever you please. Just pay attention."

As if he'd uttered an incantation, the room was instantly abuzz with shuffling bodies. He tried not to seem alarmed as students chatted loudly while pulling out chairs and dropping into them noisily. Draco noticed a lot of the girls had seated themselves in the front row, while most of the boys were lingering in the back.

"Let's get started." Draco announced. "My name is Professor Malfoy, and I'm your new Charms teacher."

Another hand was held up, only this time it was from a Gryffindor boy in the back.

"Yes?" Draco asked.

"Is Professor Snape your dad?" He asked, almost in a bored tone.

"What- no!" Draco huffed. "We don't even have the same last name, and I look nothing like him! Did Potter tell you that?"

The Gryffindor shrugged.

There was a pause as he looked at his notes, trying to gather his thoughts together. Another hand shot into the air, this time from a Ravenclaw girl.

"What is it?" Draco snapped.

"Are you married?" She asked him.

The group of girls in the front row burst into laughter and Draco's face felt hot.

"No more stupid questions!" Draco seethed. He flicked his wand and the word "Impedimenta" was written on the chalkboard behind him. "Who here knows what 'impedimenta' does?"

A few hands from the Ravenclaw side shot into the air.

"You with the hair ribbon." Draco said with a wave to a brown-haired girl.

"My name is Erica, sir." She said.

"Whatever." Draco replied dismissively. "What does 'impedimenta' do?"

"It stops or slows something down." She replied.

"Good job." Draco replied. A fluttering of giggles filled his ears and he suppressed his irritation. "Give me an example of when you'd use this spell?"

"To stop a bludger from hitting you in the face." Someone called out.

"Or a pixie from pulling your hair-"

"Or a bunch of girls swooning over you." A Ravenclaw boy snapped bitterly.

"That's stupid." Draco huffed.

Another wave of giggles erupted from the front row, disrupting his thoughts.

"Stop it- no laughing in my class." Draco said.

"Oi, what if I can't help myself?" A Gryffindor boy called.

"Then you're up shit-river, because I'm taking ten points off every laugh I hear." Draco threatened. "No more laughing."

There was a collective gasp.

"Uh...new rule," Draco started. He had forgotten how easily it came to him to swear. "If you hear me curse, don't tell anyone or I'll take off major house points."

Another hand shot up in the air.

"What now?" Draco sighed.

"Professor McGonagall takes off points for swearing."

"And I take points off for tattling." Draco snapped. "Enough of this, concentrate on the lesson."

Thankfully, the rest of the class period went smoothly. Draco was glad to be done with the group as the bell rang. He supposed that he hadn't done a bad job, per say, but he'd definitely need to meet up with Snape to get some pointers on running a classroom.

As the last student walked out he gathered his notes and went to wipe the blackboard. He A cluster of hearts drawn in chalk around "impedimenta".

"What the fuck?" He mumbled.

The memory of the giggling girls rushed back to him and he felt embarrassed. Were they trying to make a fool out of him? Surely his concerns were headmaster-worthy. He made the decision to bring it up at the teacher's meeting after dinner.

The bell rang and he snapped out of his thoughts. His next class started in two hours- he would be preoccupied with teaching until the Quidditch match.

If he was going to cripple the Gryffindor team's broomsticks now was the ideal time to do it. He slipped out of his classroom at a brisk walk keeping his expression neutral.


	2. Go Slytherin!

Draco crossed the lawn swiftly and tried to look casual as he made his way to the Quidditch locker rooms. Classes were still in session; that worked toward his advantage because the students would be mostly indoors and he didn't want any witnesses. Thankfully, he didn't cross paths with a single person as he jogged to the Gryffindor's changing room.

"Ugh- no!" Draco scowled. He lifted his feet to inspect the mud that was caked on his heels. "I just bought these."

 _"Stop being a fop and focus, Draco, you have a job to do_." His inner-voice, which sounded a lot like his father, rang in his head.

A padlock with an odd-looking keyhole hung on the locker room just as Snape had said. Draco glanced around him to ensure he was alone as he pulled out his wand.

" _Alohomora_!" he commanded, tapping the lock.

It didn't unhinge.

" _If it was that easy there'd be no reason to lock it_." Draco thought.

He stood up straight and wracked his brains. What were some of the spells he'd worked on during his internship? He was sure some of them had to do with breaking locks.

After a half hour of unsuccessful incantations the lock sprung open as if Draco had worn it down with his incessant picking at it. Draco pocketed the padlock in his robe and stepped into the locker room before anyone could noticed him.

The broom closet was easy to find, even in the dark. Draco had trouble not laughing in the middle of his jinxes as he spelled the brooms to deliver a sudden jerk once ridden upon. He was chuckling to himself as he slipped out of the locker room and replaced the padlock to it's former position.

He absolutely couldn't wait for Quidditch. He made a mental note to run into Harry and gloat- victory would be much sweeter if he could get a rise out of Potter. Draco was practically skipping with glee as he made his way to the Main Hall.

"All right there, Malfoy?"

In Draco's excitement he had forgotten to remain inconspicuous. The spring in his step faltered while Hagrid led a class of shaky 2nd years toward the school.

" _I forgot that big idiot teaches Care of Magical Creatures_." Draco thought.

"It's Professor Malfoy." Draco reminded him with a sneer.

He leaned against a nearby tree and wished he had something like a cigarette to smoke to have an obvious reason to be outside during class hours.

"O' course." Hagrid replied with a glint of suspicion.

Draco ran his finger over the tree bark hoping that communicated his apathy. He didn't offer any explanation to Hagrid as he passed by.

 

* * *

 

 

Draco's classes went more or less the same as his first one except he knew better to allow the students to choose their seats. In his new seating chart he made sure to separate the girls as much as possible to discourage tittering. As he was cleaning up for the day he spotted more hearts drawn on desks and something scribbled-out on a piece of parchment (but he could see his name was written on it).

He didn't have much time to think about it because he had to complete phase two of his mission: meet Snape. As soon as the bell rang indicating school had finished for the day, he left his classroom and travelled to the hallway leading to the dungeons.

"Well?" Snape whispered as Draco met him halfway up a staircase.

Draco gave Snape a hidden 'ok' signal with his fingers and smiled widely.

"Did anyone see you?" Snape asked. Draco's smile faltered slightly.

"Just Hagrid and a few second years- it's not a problem." Draco insisted as Snape's pleased disposition dropped. "They didn't see me near the locker room, they ran into me as I was coming back inside."

"Let's hope Hagrid's too dim to come to any damning conclusions." Snape replied softly. "How were your classes?"

"Not bad." Draco replied. "Although..."

"...Yes?" Snape prodded him.

"Something has to be done about those girls." Draco snapped. "It's as if they're sharing a hive-mind. How do they all know when to laugh at the same time?"

"Those slack-jawed, knuckle-draggers get ample practice drooling over Potter. After the Quidditch game it will be Minerva and his responsibility to teach them to tame their hormonal outbursts." Snape replied with a terrible, indulgent smile.

Draco was relieved that he wouldn't have to be teaching Sex Ed. Class was hard enough to get through with all the incessant giggling- Sex Ed would be impossible.

"We're drawing attention." Snape whispered. Draco looked around the hall and spied Harry looking at them with concern.

"I'll meet you in later the stands tonight." Draco said. "I want to check-up on our team."

 

* * *

 

 

The Slytherin team was heading to the Quidditch field when Draco caught up with them. Daniel Greer, the Slytherin Quidditch captain, was first to break away from the group and vigorously shake his hand.

"Thank you so much Mr. Malfoy, sir!" He said with a toothy smile.

"For what?" Draco said. He hadn't expected to be received so enthusiastically.

The team gathered around him and held up their brooms.

"For the Novas!" Greer said. "We just got 'em by owl."

In each one of their hands was a brilliantly polished, dark blue lacquered broomstick with the word "Nova" written in golden ink. Draco knew immediately where they had gotten them.

"Oh." Draco said. "My father probably sent those, Malfoy senior."

Murmurs of thanks echoed around the team as Draco openly admired their new equipment. In the distance the Gryffindor team was approaching led by Harry Potter.

"Quickly everyone-" Draco whispered. "Stand in back of me and don't say anything, just hold your brooms."

Their rivals slowed their pace as they passed by. The Slytherins were grinning ear-to-ear as a flicker of worry was shared between the Gryffindors. Draco crossed his arms and felt deep satisfaction as the team came to a halt and Harry approached him.

"This looks familiar." Harry scoffed noticing their new brooms. "If you're trying to buy your team a win it won't work, Malfoy. It didn't work last time. It's a good thing you're not teaching History of Magic."

"I'll also not be teaching Sex Ed. Better lube-up, Potter, because the Slytherin team is going to beat the pants off you." Draco replied smugly. "This game will be over faster than you can say 'gonorrhea'- which you'll be saying...a lot... because you'll be teaching Sex Ed-"

"-I get it." Harry interrupted him. "We'll see who leaves limping."

The Slytherin team and the Gryffindor team exchanged uncomfortable looks with each other.

"That was awkward." Harry said. "We could get in trouble if the kids report us."

"Everyone pretend we never said that." Draco replied. For once he was obliged to agree with Potter. "But get used to feeling awkward, because you're going to lose." he said switching strategies.

"You have no idea what you're talking about, Malfoy. New broomsticks won't make a winning team." Harry said.

"Winners make a winning team and you're in short supply." Draco said looking his nose down at Harry.

"Over-confident without reason as always." Harry said. "We'll see if that carries over on the field."

"Yeah...we'll see." Draco replied.

 

* * *

 

Even though this Quidditch game was of minor importance, due to its position of being in the beginning of the second semester, there was a considerable turn-out for it. A few Hogwarts alumni were sharing food and drinks before the game started. Draco spied a cluster of red-haired people hanging out near the snack stand- they could only be Weasley's.

Fred and George chatted happily with Harry and had brought along their little sister Ginny. Ron Weasley was also there and he had his arm around Hermione's shoulders. Draco's gut clenched as Ron added another arm around her and hugged her from behind.

" _Weasley? She's dating that ginger-oaf_?" Draco thought, his nose wrinkling. " _She could do so much better than that tramp_."

Draco He didn't remember Hermione having an engagement ring (he was sure he would recall that.) If they were dating that probably meant they'd been dating since forever.

Ron swung Hermione around suddenly and she let out a startled laugh. Draco gnashed his teeth together at the sight.

_What does she see in him? He's man-handling her like an ape! Women don't like being treated like a bag of laundry!_

He decided that he wanted to get a better look at their relationship-dynamic. Getting close wouldn't be easy, but he knew he had a good excuse to walk past the snack stand since the Slytherin stands were close by.

George (or Fred) sounded like he was in the middle of a joke when Draco passed by. Instantly the group was quiet; he knew they were watching him (maybe they were waiting for a confrontation?) but he pretended not to know they were there as he ignored their stares.

Once he was out of their sight, he used the crowds to maneuver back around. They wouldn't be less likely to suspect he was spying on them if they thought he already passed by. He spotted the perfect hiding spot- a long school banner had been picketed in the ground (Go Slytherin!). If he kneeled behind it he could peek over and see the group from the back, but most importantly, he could hear them.

"-They're beyond terrible," Harry was saying joyfully. "Those brooms would have to steer themselves for Slytherin to win. Malfoy's confidence is so misguided I almost feel sorry for him."

"Speaking of Malfoy..." Fred (or George) piped up.

Draco's heart jumped into his throat, but he realized they weren't referring to him. Draco's father had met up with Snape in the distance. After exchanging a greeting they kissed briefly on the lips.

Fred and George took turns to pretend to violently puke into a nearby trashcan. Ginny giggled and Draco felt his temper flaring.

"Yuck." Ron grunted as Lucius entwined his fingers with Snape's.

Draco wanted to burst out of his hiding place and start cursing the lot of them, but Hermione saved him by slapping Ron's shoulder.

"Ow- what was that for?" Ron whined.

"I can't have people thinking my boyfriend's a homophobe." Hermione said in a panic.

"It's not gross because it's gay, it's gross because _they're_ gross." Ron explained.

"People wouldn't think that." Hermione insisted.

"Yeah they would." Ron replied incredulously. Harry laughed but was cut short as she shot them both a glare.

"You need to relax, no one is watching us. Rita Skeeter's gone, remember?" Ron said. Draco shifted in his hiding-spot nervously.

"The parents are always watching," Hermione sighed. "And always judging."

"That's... creepy." Ron mumbled. "Look...maybe you should step-down if being Headmistress makes you so miserable."

"I told you not to bring that up again." Hermione told him.

"But you're so unhappy-"

"Ron!" Hermione seethed. "Shush! I'm not having this conversation now!"

She had shrugged off Ron's hug and had stormed off to the Gryffindor stands.

"Wow, she cleared off fast." George (or Fred) said.

Ron looked miserable as he kicked the ground.

Draco nearly had a heart-attack when someone squatted next to him. He grabbed the grass as he nearly over-balanced in terror.

"Luna," Draco choked. "what do you think you're doing?"

"Oh we're whispering? How fun!" She said with a smile. She handed him a clipboard with paperwork attached to it. "The Headmistress wanted me to ask all the teachers to sign-up to chaperone a Hogsmeade weekend-"

"Now isn't a good time." Draco snarled.

"Did you want to be alone? Is that why you're hiding?" Luna asked.

Draco peeked over the banner and saw Ron was getting dangerously close to him. The last thing he wanted was to be discovered eavesdropping. He grabbed the quill attached to the clipboard and scribbled his name on one of the lines.

"Here- leave!" Draco whispered harshly, handing it back to her. She began to stand up and he grabbed her arm. "No- sneak away, don't let anyone see you leave."

"Good thinking. If we play hide-and-seek I want you on my team." Luna said with a smile.

Draco watched her crawl away, amazed.

 

* * *

 

 

The Slytherins were worse than Draco had expected. At the opening of the game the team zoomed about on their new broomsticks, but their technique was sloppy compared to the precise athletic abilities that the Gryffindor team possessed- and it obvious the Slytherins lacked skill as they struggled to stay synchronized when taking the field.

Within an easy three second's time the Gryffindor team held possession of the quaffle. Just as their captain geared up to shoot it through the hoops his broomstick nose-dived and his throw pitifully smacked against one of the poles.

"And Alderman botches his throw... Slytherin has the quaffle." the Gryffindor announcer proclaimed, confusion in his voice. He wasn't nearly as confused as Alderman who was looking at his broomstick in awe.

Snape, Lucius and Draco were grinning like Cheshire cats as the Gryffindor team suffered one malfunction after another. The Slytherin stands were beginning to sound a bit like a movie laugh-track as Gryffindor players smacked into poles, balls, and even each other. Draco roared with laughter as a Gryffindor's broomstick bucked upwards, effectively making a passing bludger knock him square in the face. The player fell off his broom looking equal parts shocked and dazed.

The Gryffindor stands were silent and Draco spotted Harry in the front row. Potter looked furious and ill and Ginny Weasley was standing beside him gripping the front of the box tightly. Hermione Granger was in some sort of horrified hypnotic spell- her eyes were wide and her hands were covering her mouth. Ron was patting her shoulder in sympathy.

At halftime the Gryffindor team was so beat-up that they were forced for forfeit.

"I do love a bit of sport." Lucius said loudly as the defeat was announced.

"See you later, darling." Snape said to Lucius suddenly. The crowd was beginning to gather their belongings and Snape took advantage of their distraction to be the first person out of the stands.

"Where's he going?" Draco asked.

"Oh, he's off to have his fun." Lucius said airily. He dropped a heavy hand on Draco's shoulder. "Well done, Draco!"

 

* * *

 

 

Dinner was exquisite. The Gryffindor table didn't look like they were eating much as the Slytherins exchanged high-fives and sang songs of triumph. Clearly no one had expected Slytherin to win, and they were milking their triumph. Draco had an arsenal of abuse to fling at Harry, but Potter had wisely gone missing from the High Table. McGonagall looked as if she deeply regretted attending dinner while Snape gloated.

"Such a _shame_ , Minerva." Snape purred as he sat in Harry's seat. "I don't think I've ever seen Gryffindor play so terribly. I believe that puts Slytherin in the lead for the House Cup..."

She pretended not to hear him but Draco saw her mouth get thinner. He felt cheated that he couldn't do a little taunting of his own with Harry; he concluded he might get the opportunity to hurl a few stinging comments at Harry if Potter showed up to the teacher's meeting early.

He finished his shepard's pie and excused himself from the table. Their meeting was scheduled in twenty five minutes and he was certain he'd be the first one there.

He discovered, however, that he wasn't the first one in the meeting room. When Draco opened the door he was met with an unexpected sight.

Hermione Granger was slumped over in a chair, her long hair was covering her face but it was clear from the distressed sounds she was making she was crying.

Draco cleared his throat and watched as the simple gesture caused her to straighten up and wipe her face vigorously with the back of her hand. She stood and turned away from Draco.

"Congratulations on your victory." Hermione sniffed. "The Gryffindor team... they weren't playing their best. Somehow."

"Slytherin still won." Draco said quickly. He didn't want to give her any ideas about rescinding their defeat over Gryffindor.

"They won because something went wrong." Hermione said, turning around. She was putting on a brave face, but her cheeks were tear-stained and her eyes were shining.

Was there any sight more heart-wrenching than a woman crying? Draco didn't think so. He had seen his mother cry a handful of times and only when something went seriously bad; like her son being offered to the Dark Lord, or his father being thrown in Azkaban, or the time he used her favorite shade of lipstick as a crayon. The same hopelessness and misery echoed in Hermione's face.

And it was all his fault.

"There's something sinister attacking the school, and I'm afraid students are going to get hurt." Hermione said, her eyes welling up with tears. She looked away from him, embarrassed.

_Don't do it. Don't._

"...I jinxed the broomsticks." Draco admitted.

"...What did you say?" Hermione gasped.

"I cheated." Draco said. "...because I didn't want to teach Sex Ed."

Draco's mouth opened in shock as Hermione rushed toward him. By instinct he opened his arms- she must have been so relieved to find out Hogwarts was safe that she was going to hug him.

Instead her fists came down on his chest and ribs like she was playing a bongo solo.

"Ow! _OW_!" Draco shouted twisting away from her.

"I thought-" She slammed her fists down on his shoulders and back, "something evil was attacking students!"

"Stop- this is hardly behavior befitting for a headmistress!" Draco whined.

"Stupid- immature- teachers not wanting to teach- stupid -Sex Ed!" She hissed through clenched teeth. Her fist came down with every word.

"It was my dad's idea!" He lied. Technically it was Snape's, but he didn't think it would be smart to involve another staff-member into Hermione's wrath.

"Stop it!" Draco said grabbing both her wrists.

"Let me go!" She snapped at him, her face flushed with anger.

She made to knee him in the groin.

"NooOOooo! Don't you dare!" Draco said letting go of one of her wrists and placing his hand on her thigh.

They both were looking at each other with astonishment. She slowly lowered her knee and Draco's grip on her other wrist loosened. There was a sudden rush of romantic chemistry between them, and even though she had just attacked him he was under heavy temptation to kiss her. He swallowed thickly as he looked at her soft, swollen lips. He could smell her perfume.

Professor McGonagall entered the room and Draco was snapped out of his...whatever he was doing with Hermione. He let go of her wrist as McGonagall looked between them.

"Is everything alright, Headmistress?" McGonagall asked steadily. Her hand was hovering over her belt and Draco realized with horror that she was reaching for her wand.

Draco was certain that McGonagall had gotten the wrong impression. Hermione's tear-stained face and his aggressive grip on her wrist sent all sorts of wrong messages.

"Yes!" Hermione chirped. "Fine."

Hermione dashed to her place at the long table and straightened a few papers. Draco tried to look just as unconcerned, but a quick glance told him McGonagall was watching him closely. He treaded carefully as he took a seat on the end farthest away from them both.

"That's right, think the worst of us Slytherins like you always do." Draco thought as McGonagall took her place next to Hermione.

Staff was starting to filter in. He quietly reflected on what had transpired between himself and the headmistress. What the hell had gotten into him? What could have possessed him to want to kiss Granger? She was a know-it-all tag-along for that pauper Weasley. She was best friends with sucky Harry Potter.

Snape sat next to Draco and broke his internal interrogation.

"There haven't been many staff meetings I've looked forward to, but this one I will cherish forever." Snape whispered. "Take note at Potter's expression once the Sex Ed position is announced."

_Oh shit._

Draco ran a hand through his hair and bit his nails. He felt a chill grip him as cold as the time he walked through The Bloody Baron. He was such an idiot. He was such a fool. Why had he told Granger the truth before the meeting?

Harry Potter had finally shown up, and Snape's nostrils were flaring- the man was a ball of raw excitement- Draco didn't know how he was going to do it, but he had to switch seats immediately. He simply couldn't be near Snape once the Sex Ed announcement was made. (At least not within strangling-distance).

Snape was so absorbed in his anticipated revenge that he didn't pay Draco any mind as he jumped out of his chair and paced around the room. The meeting was about to start and seats were being grabbed quickly.

Would someone see the empty chair next to Snape and take it? He doubted it.

Neville Longbottom and Luna were the last to arrive. Draco was running out of time.

"Luna, I need you." Draco said urgently. Neville opened his mouth to protest but Draco silenced him with a glare.

"Draco, you're looking unnaturally alarmed this evening." Luna informed him pleasantly.

"Shut your crazy for a minute." Draco whispered to her. "I need a favor, I need you to sit next to Snape. No- don't look at him, and don't say anything- just sit down."

Luna gestured locking her lips and crossed the room to plop herself down in Draco's former chair. Neville was reaching out to her like a man who just watched his wife being thrown into a tank full of sharks. She waved to her husband as Snape slowly turned to her, frowning.

"What have you done?" Neville whispered to Draco.

Just like Draco, Snape didn't seem to have much patience for Luna.

"Mrs. Longbottom-" Snape started coldly.

"Shhhhh." Luna put her finger to her lips. Draco cringed as Snape's jaw clenched.

"Please sit gentlemen, we're going to begin." Hermione said.

Snape was throwing Draco a questioning look and Draco shrugged, trying to keep his expression innocent. He sat next to Neville Longbottom who instantly shuffled his chair away from him once they had been seated.

The entire meeting was torture. Every time a new subject came up Draco's heart would jump into his throat only to have it float slowly down as the conversation droned on. He wasn't sure if waiting for the horrible news was part of his punishment. He could hardly concentrate as teachers went through a seemingly unending list of administrative issues.

Only three minutes of the meeting remained.

Maybe, just maybe, she had let him off the hook.

"And in closing, I wish to inform you that due to Gryffindor's unfortunate loss in tonight's Quidditch match, Professors Malfoy and Snape will be teaching Sex Ed." Hermione said firmly.

 _Oh Merlin, here it comes_. Draco held his breath.

The fallout was terrible. No one said a word. Snape, who had been looking forward to Harry's depression, looked as if he had been slapped in the face. Luna poured him a glass of water and placed it in his hand as McGonagall and Harry became increasingly bemused. Snape was first to break the silence.

"Headmistress- those were not the terms- you are mistaken." Snape choked. The water in his glass was shaking.

"I'm not mistaken. Professor Malfoy came forward and admitted to cheating." Hermione told them all flatly.

A person usually has one recurring nightmare in their lifetime. Draco's was the one where Voldemort hugged him before blasting him and his family into bits. That would be replaced. All of the professors, some of them his former teachers, turned to him at once with an expression of unbridled disgust.

"Surely I should not be punished by another's indiscretion-" Snape said in a thin-voice.

"-As head of Slytherin House you share equal responsibility for this 'indiscretion'." Hermione interrupted him. "I don't really care if you had anything to do with it or not. A student could have been seriously injured because Slytherin couldn't win through honest means."

McGonagall nodded to Hermione encouragingly as Snape's nails scraped against the table in a silent rage. Harry was coughing into his hand which sounded a lot like a laugh.

When Hermione asked if anyone had any thoughts or concerns to share, Draco didn't dare speak up about the 'giggling girls' issue. He thought it best to disappear completely off everyone's radar for a while. Especially Snape's.

Easier said than done, of course.

 

* * *

 

 

Draco thought, if maybe given a couple days to absorb the bad news, Snape would be feeling less angry at him for spoiling their 'victory'.

He was so very wrong. Draco hadn't imagined Snape could be more furious with him, but he was. Draco didn't think Snape would ever treat him with malice on par with his hatred for Harry, but he did.

"What were you thinking!?" Snape growled.

It was the first thing Snape had said to him in days. Draco had made the mistake of trying to get his attention in between classes and was left in a state of shock as Snape ignored his 'good morning' and walked right past him.

Snape giving him the cold shoulder couldn't last forever though. Every Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday morning they were to teach Sex Ed, which meant they did have to talk to each other eventually. Draco had run into Snape on his way to the classroom. He was walking in quick, long strides that made Draco rush to catch up.

"She was _crying_!" Draco insisted.

"And?" Snape seethed. He turned abruptly and Draco nearly lost balance to keep from running into him. "Are you suggesting if someone is sad enough you'll grovel at their feet to please them?"

"She thought something evil was attacking the school." Draco explained.

"Something evil is attacking the school- and it was our perfect cover. No one would have questioned it." Snape said his lip curling in anger.

"What?" Draco huffed. "What's attacking the school?"

"Nothing you have to concern yourself with." Snape replied waving a dismissive hand in his face. "You and I have to focus on teaching this unseemly subject up to official standards. I have better things to do with my time then grade and make tests, so that will be your job. And you can inform your father why I have even less free time for him- that is also your job."

Snape left no room for rebuttal as he swung open the door to the classroom with a bang and glided inside. Draco trailed behind him and tried not to look any students in the face as they stared at them. Their audience was a medley of students from all houses, but if Draco had to guess they were third and fourth years.

Draco stood awkwardly by the desk as Snape loomed over the class, his angry presence silencing the room.

"No doubt most of you already know how to have sex." Snape began in a furious, low growl. "That's not the point of this course. This class is a feeble attempt to save you from disfigurement, disease, and causing unnecessary burden on others by procreating…" He paused and glared at the students. "...by accident." he added with a sarcastic tint.

Draco wiped his face with his hand. Co-teaching this class was going to be hell.

"We'll begin with anatomy." Snape announced. The class jumped as he brandished his wand in the air with a swift jerk.

A white backdrop fell from the ceiling and nearly hit Draco on the head. He dodged and pretended not to be uncomfortable as a large, labeled, text-book diagram of a penis and a vagina was projected on it. Someone in the class dared to laugh and Draco's eye widened with fear. Thankfully Snape had ignored it.

"Copy this diagram." Snape ordered. There was a shuffle for parchment and quills. Draco was a little jealous how seamlessly Snape manipulated students into obeying his commands. "You have ten minutes. It will be handed in at the end of class." Snape hovered over to Draco. "For you to grade." He said.

"I'm sorry." Draco pleaded. Snape was visually unimpressed by his apology. "If she was going to look into it, she probably would have found out anyway."

"Really?" Snape snapped. "Did you carve, 'Tis I, Draco Malfoy, who jinxed these brooms' on the broom closet before departing?" he asked sarcastically.

It wasn't often that Draco was on Snape's bad side, but when he was, it felt like being bitten by the beloved family pet. Draco crossed his arms tightly and glared at the floor to keep Snape from noticing his upset.

" _So I'm not a cold-hearted bastard like you_." Draco thought. " _Next time I see Granger crying I'll just kick her in the face and everyone can be happy."_

Thinking about Hermione Granger caused a sick fluttering in his stomach. The diagram of the vagina floated into his mind, too quick for Draco to perish it.

Snape was clearly taking a more medical approach to the class than a 'down-to-earth' approach. During a question-and-answer session, a Hufflepuff boy had made the mistake of calling a vagina a "fanny".

"If you're not mature enough to call it a 'vagina' then you shouldn't be exposed to one!" Snape snarled at him. " _Children_ use nicknames for body parts."

Despite everyone's shared terror that Snape was teaching them about human sexuality, Draco thought he was doing quite well and doubted he himself could handle the class at half the caliber of his Head of House. At the end of the lesson there was no question Snape had taught them the technical terms.

"Your homework is to write three questions you have about genitals or sex. Don't sign your name on it." Snape told them as they handed in their diagrams. He turned to Draco. "This will give us some idea of what subjects to pay extra attention to in class."

The end of the lesson was the end of Snape making conversation with Draco.


	3. In the Loop

Draco spent that afternoon comparing diagrams in the staffroom as he tried telling himself his father wouldn't allow Snape to treat him like Harry Potter forever. He also decided the dexterity of waving a wand didn't translate well into drawing, and he was left even more frustrated by his student's horrid handwriting.

"Beautiful drawings. They're even better than the ones in the men's lavatory." Harry remarked, looking over his shoulder.

"I can give you a few to hang up in your room if you like." Draco replied.

"Yeah, and you can title them 'Cheaters Never Win'." Harry said. "If I didn't know you personally I'd be asking myself how anyone could stoop so low. Sabotaging teenager's broomsticks to win a Quidditch game...you know you're a teacher, right?"

Draco flashed Harry a drawing of a penis and flipped him off.

"Very mature." Harry said with a stiff smile. "Enjoy grading that."

Their feud was interrupted as the staff door opened. Harry's smile died as Lucius Malfoy waltzed in looking around the room with an air of elegance.

"Ah, Draco." Lucius said softly, spying him on the couch. "I'm so very disappointed in you."

Draco's face burned with humiliation as Harry chuckled. Receiving a lecture from his father was cruel when Potter was watching. His father, however, didn't seem receptive to his feelings as he marched towards him stiffly.

"Father, can you come back at another time? I'm working." Draco pleaded. He hoped that he could get his father to leave before Potter witnessed something embarrassing.

"Severus told me everything..." Lucius replied ignoring his son's request. "I didn't realize I had raised a snitch- and snitching on yourself? How does one begin to understand such insanity? How could you allow the Granger girl to manipulate you into turning yourself in?"

"Wow." Harry laughed, shaking his head at Draco. "I think I understand where you get your moral compass from."

"Fuck off, scarhead." Draco hissed at Harry.

"So it's true, you do swear like a sailor." Harry said, crossing his arms. "Students have been telling me-"

"-No one cares, Potter." Lucius Malfoy said, stepping in front of Harry. He was now blocking Harry from Draco's view with his body. "Have you seen Severus?"

"I just taught Sex Ed with him. See all the papers I need to be left in peace to grade?" Draco said, holding up a stack of parchment.

"If you wanted peace you shouldn't have fouled everything up. Make no mistake, I blame you for putting him into such a horrid mood." Lucius accused.

"You mean he has other moods?" Harry huffed.

"Pardon me, Potter, this is a conversation between me and my son." Lucius growled, turning.

"And this is a room for staff only." Harry replied cooly. "The only reason I haven't rushed you out is because I'm hoping Hermione catches you and kicks you out of Hogwarts permanently."

"She can't kick me out, I practically pay your salary." Lucius laughed.

However, Harry's words must have worried Lucius more than he let on, because he looked slightly alarmed when the staff room door opened and it was Hermione Granger who stepped inside.

"Ah, Headmistress!" Lucius said. Draco recognized his dad was wearing his 'charming smile' that he reserved for politicians and the former Minister of Magic, Fudge.

Hermione didn't take to flattery like Fudge had; once Lucius Malfoy swept towards her she clutched the book she was carrying closer to her chest and she eyed him warily.

"I was just speaking with my son about the new Sex Ed course, I think it's a wonderful addition to the school." Lucius said smoothly.

"Draco told me the broom-jinxing fiasco was your idea." Hermione replied, deadpan.

"Dammit Draco!" Lucius snarled, turning in place. Draco hunched over the homework with his grading quill refusing to meet his father's eyes. Snape had declared war on him and it seemed his father was going to follow suit.

"Mr. Malfoy, you're not supposed to be in the staff room. In fact, you're not supposed to be in Hogwarts during school hours. It's a safety violation. We've been over this many, many, many, many times." Hermione said, tight-lipped. Draco thought McGonagall was really beginning to rub off on her.

"Safety violation? But you know me!" Lucius laughed. He pressed his snake-cane to his chest. "I'd never hurt a student."

"Ginny Weasley!" Harry coughed.

Lucius shot Harry a withering glare over his shoulder.

"You pushed your son into jinxing the entire Gryffindor team's brooms to win a Quidditch match." Hermione said in deliberate, slow words.

"That's just hear-say, my dear." Lucius said gently. Perhaps he sensed he was losing his audience's good graces, because he let out a small sigh and sped-walked to the door. "I see Severus isn't here- so I'll be on my way."

"Mr. Malfoy, at the very least sign-in at the office so we know when you're here!" Hermione shouted quickly as she followed him out of the room. "And don't interrupt Professor Snape's class!" She shouted down the hallway.

"Ugh!" she groaned slamming the staff room door behind her.

"Ban him, Hermione." Harry insisted.

"I can't, Snape would quit and this school has enough problems." Hermione sighed.

Draco wasn't sure if she had seen him in the room, but grading vagina and penis drawings seemed a thousand times more embarrassing now she'd arrived. He strategically placed his briefcase on top of the papers before she spotted them.

"Harry...I'm afraid I'm going to need you to look into that thing." She said quietly.

"That thing?" Draco thought. "Could 'that thing' be something evil attacking the school that Snape mentioned?"

He was almost certain of it when Harry's eyes flickered towards him to see if Draco had heard her. Again Draco felt as if he was intruding. He couldn't really pretend to be busy because the Sex Ed homework was hidden under his briefcase, so instead he grabbed the Hogsmeade sheet that had been placed on the coffee table for sign-ups.

"Great." Draco choked under his breath.

In his haste he had inadvertently signed-up to attend the Hogsmeade trip for tomorrow afternoon. This was very bad, because he had spent his entire weekend preparing for classes. Being a chaperone for Hogsmeade would cut into his free time and leave even less time for planning, and without Snape's help he felt he needed every second of his weekend.

Draco shovelled the Sex Ed homework into his briefcase and snapped it shut. The staff room wasn't the best place to get work done and he didn't want to risk being interrupted. If he wanted to survive next week he had to start planning now.

 

* * *

 

 

Draco was an absolute shut-in all Friday evening and Saturday morning. He hadn't stopped working except to eat and take bathroom breaks- the rest of his time was spent in his room preparing for class.

He no longer had the advantage of going to Snape for advice or to practice his lessons. In a moment of weakness he had shown up to Snape's private quarters to ask for assistance. Snape had answered his door and as soon as he saw it was Draco standing before him, in mid-sentence of his greeting the door was slammed in his face.

Draco was stuck teaching a weeks-worth of incantations to his mirror.

"Very good, dear." His mirror encouraged him as he criticised the imaginary way the mirror was waving it's wand.

"It's _Professor_." Draco huffed.

He checked his watch and ran to his closet. The trip to Hogsmeade was in an hour and he still hadn't changed out of his bedclothes. He had dreaded it but thanks to his devotion, he had caught-up with his classwork and now he looked forward to a much-needed break outside the school.

He discovered the students were equally excited to get away. After Draco delivered the usual speech about not being terrible abroad, he had them line up near the carriage pick-up and hand in their permission slips before departing. He was in a daydream as they stacked up in his palm one-by-one.

"Why didn't you tell me it'd started?"

Draco watched as Filch ran down a flight of stairs with absurd urgency. Mrs. Norris was tucked in his arms and also shot Draco a look of intense disapproval.

Once upon a time Filch had liked Draco. Their relationship had only recently become strained after Lucius Malfoy cursed Mrs. Norris- Draco supposed that was akin to his father attacking Filch's wife. His cat-wife. Clearly a line had been drawn his father stepped over it, and Draco was paying for his father's sins.

"Every year there's a few who try beggin' to go to Hogsmeade without their slips," Filch explained, a look of ecstasy growing on his face. "Sometimes they tear up a little if their friends wave goodbye."

Mrs. Norris jumped to the ground as Filch pulled out a thick roll of parchment from his breast pocket.

"What's that?" Draco asked.

"Parent's signatures." Filch said with a sniff. He tapped the side of his nose with a dirty index finger. "To detect forgeries!"

"...You're a sick, sad man." Draco mumbled. Filch didn't hear him, though.

"Gimmie those." Filch demanded, snatching the slips out of Draco's hand. The caretaker busied himself by comparing the slips against his signature list while eyeballing student's closely to detect guilt.

Much to Filch's disappointment every student that approached them had their Hogsmeade permission slips. Filch grabbed them and shoved them in his coat making his chest bulge strangely. He would file them away (and also look for forgeries) and he promised Draco he'd be dragging students back to school if any of them looked the least bit suspect.

"I don't caaaaare!" Draco shouted as Filch told him more stories about past student's misfortunes.

Draco felt Mrs. Norris swipe his ankle as he jumped into the last carriage going to Hogsmeade.

 

* * *

 

 

He had no intentions of checking up on the students- they were old enough to go shopping for Merlin's sake. Instead Once Draco got out of the carriage, he made a beeline for the Hogs Head. He needed a drink, and not even the odd smell of goats disturbed him as he stepped into the dimly lit inn.

The Hogs Head was as dirty and seedy as he remembered. It was around lunch time and the normal crowd had gathered. Draco took a seat at the bar and ordered an Irish whiskey. Filch's student stories, the giggling girls, his father's lecture and Snape's blatant hatred melted away sip-by-sip. Draco didn't even inspect the glass for cleanliness because he wanted to enjoy himself.

"Malfoy, I can't say I'm surprised to see you shirking your duties."

Draco put down his glass a little harder than he meant to and turned. Hermione Granger was looking stern and flustered as she approached him at the bar. To his surprise she removed her coat and threw it over the barstool next to him before sitting on it.

"I could say the same thing to you, Headmistress." Draco told her.

"You're supposed to be chaperoning students." She told him.

"They're not babies." Draco snapped. "They can shop without mummy and daddy breathing down their necks."

He thought he might have changed her mind because she didn't press him any further. One of the bartenders brought her a beer on tap that she ordered and she nursed it quietly. Draco noticed she was looking straight ahead, as if determined not to catch his eye.

_This is stupid. She's alone and I'm alone, why is she pretending I'm not here?_

"The Hog's Head doesn't exactly look like your haunt." Draco spoke to her.

"It's not." Hermione admitted. She hesitated slightly. "I'm ducking Cindy Wolfe, a parent. She's determined to get me to explain her son's bad grades. I saw her in the Three Broomsticks- I'd recognize that awful junior-mullet anywhere."

"You've come to the right place for a pick-me-up, they serve stronger liquor here anyway." Draco said. "I had my first underage beer here and my first hangover. Fond memories..."

"Is that so?" Hermione said raising an eyebrow.

Aberforth had replaced his bartender and was now tending the patrons. He quickly switched his attention from serving drinks to cleaning. Hermione's gaze followed him as he picked up a fluffy pink duster and began swiping dirt off the back bottles on display in vain.

"I'm surprised to see you here." Draco spoke. "I always pegged you for a teetotaller."

"Why's that?" Hermione asked.

"Because you're so nauseatingly proper." Draco laughed. She bristled slightly. "In fact, I am positive the Hermione Granger I know would never hang up her headmistress hat and let me buy her a drink."

"Not if she already has a drink." Hermione said, lifting her glass showing her half-empty beer.

"This is sort of a two drink place. Or three. Or ten." Draco said. "Or at least, that's what teenage Draco remembers."

"Nice try, but you'll never get me drunk enough to excuse you from teaching Sex Ed, Malfoy." She snapped. She jumped in her seat when Draco laughed.

"I can see my Slytherin charms won't work on you." Draco sighed.

"Try using some regular charm and leave out the forked tongue." Hermione replied.

He wasn't sure if it was the whiskey talking, but he could have sworn her frosty exterior was melting towards him with every sip. Draco had a good head-start on her and was pleasantly buzzed by the time she finished her first beer.

"Hey- another for the lady." Draco said to Aberforth.

"I'm going to need to see some ID." Aberforth said as he rested his elbows on the bar. "Sorry, just house rules. If you look younger than fifty we card. Don't you know there's a school near here and your baby-face-"

"Alright, I think you've convinced her." Draco said, flashing his ID. Hermione giggled.

 _"I'm making her laugh_." Draco thought. " _Maybe she's not an ice queen_."

"I probably shouldn't drink it." Hermione said as her old glass was removed and replaced. "In fact, I don't really drink a lot, it's just things have been..."

"Complicated?" Draco finished for her.

"To put it mildly." Hermione said as she took a deep sip of her drink. "Being a student was so easy, I knew exactly what to do to succeed- I was given all the answers. Real life is nothing like a classroom... I've never felt so unprepared in my life." Hermione said. "Sometimes I feel like I'm the worst eadmistress in Hogwart's history."

Draco could tell she immediately regretted telling him that. The color in her cheeks was deepening and her somber admission seemed to sober her up as she avoided his eyes. Draco recalled the memory of Ron Weasley's advice for her to quit and her reaction.

"Well, not the worst." She said quickly. "Mabel the Unstable routinely executed first years in 24 A.D., but she was ...unstable."

"Who wouldn't feel unstable as headmistress of that school? Hogwarts is a magnet for trouble." Draco told her. "Do you remember how much dark shit happened here when we were students? It was ridiculous. I think every year someone almost died- or did die. People might have liked Dumbledore but he was utterly worthless. Nobody is dead yet so...cheers!" he said hitting his glass against hers.

"Don't take this the wrong way, but...why are you being so nice to me?" Hermione asked him.

"You mean why am I not acting like a 15 year-old, stuck-up, pure-blood supremacist?" Draco asked.

"I didn't- that's not-" Hermione stuttered.

"It's alright...honestly, I don't really have a lot of friends here." Draco replied. "I've only got two, and one of them is my father. The other is Snape. They're both angry with me at the moment...guess I'm casting a wider net now that I'm completely friendless."

"Maybe not completely friendless..." Hermione said with an easy smile.

He felt his heart flutter and there was an excited warmth in the pit of his stomach.

"We should hang out more without Potty and the Weasel." Draco said. "You're not so bad when they're not hanging off you like dead skin."

"Ah, there's that wonderful Slytherin charm again." Hermione laughed. She slipped off her stool and put on her coat. "I think that's my cue to leave. I mustn't enjoy myself too much, every day's a school day when you're Headmistress."

"I'll walk you out." Draco said jumping off his stool and throwing money on the bar.

"I can walk to the door, Malfoy." Hermione insisted.

"I don't know, Cindy Wolfe could run into you and you might have to fight off her mullet-frenzy solo." Draco replied. He offered her his arm. "Best not to risk these things."

"I suppose it never hurts to be careful." Hermione said, taking it.

" _Oh Merlin, this is happening. We're flirting. I think I'm falling for Hermione Granger_." Draco thought to himself as they walked out of the Hogs Head. " _What would father think?"_

He was extra pleased to see she didn't let go of his arm even as they exited the inn.

_Will she let me walk her to the carriages?_

It was worth trying. They both strolled with arms linked and Draco felt like a king- for a minute anyway. He almost yanked her as she came to a sudden stop and slipped her arm out of his. His heart sank- maybe she sobered-up and remembered who was escorting her.

Her face had paled and she was looking to the sky causing him to reconsider. He turned to see what she was looking at.

"What the hell?" Draco swore. He shaded his eyes by cupping a hand over his eyebrows.

A storm cloud as thick and dark as smog was hovering silently over the Forbidden Forest in a swirl, like a sluggish tornado. Tendrils were occasionally dipping into the treeline before rejoining the black.

"Oh my god-" Hermione gasped. "Harry!"

She ran towards the carriages and Draco followed closely after her.

"Wait-" Draco puffed as he ran. "What-"

Hermione stopped and Draco sent rocks skidding as he slid to a stop next to her. The inky black cloud became suddenly wispy and steadily transparent until it dissipated. Within seconds they were looking at a normal, clear blue sky.

"Is that what's attacking the school?" Draco asked catching his breath.

"You know about that?" Hermione asked. She didn't wait for his answer as she grabbed his forearm.

He felt a twisting pressure on all of his sides and stumbled when he found his feet. He felt dizzy but recognized that he was facing the Forbidden Forest.

"It broke the wards again." Hermione marveled. He wasn't sure if she was speaking to him.

"But- you can't apparate in Hogwarts." Draco gasped. He felt like he might puke- apparating after drinking always made him ten times more nauseous.

"Harry!" Hermione shouted, running into the forest.

Draco hesitated.

In his first year he served a detention in the Forbidden Forest and the experience left a nasty scar in his memory. In fact, he felt like one of his graduation presents was never having to go into the creepy forest again.

But he couldn't just let his headmistress run into a dank forest alone with something on the loose.

Draco swore as he ran after her. He acknowledged that he was a bit of a coward. His nerves were vibrating with fright as he stumbled through the brush. He always thought that 'spineless' was an unfair label for being sensitive to his inner-voice, the voice of sensible self-preservation; a Malfoy doesn't throw his life away recklessly. That's what he told himself, anyway.

Hermione wasn't too far ahead of him as he spotted her rushing towards someone. Harry Potter stood before her with his wand drawn, he pointed it at Draco before recognizing him. Slowly the wand lowered.

"What are you doing here, Malfoy?" Harry scowled.

"Bird watching." Draco huffed with sarcasm. "What do you think, waz-bucket?"

Harry lifted his wand again and Draco mirrored the movement.

"Guys!" Hermione barked suddenly. "Now is not the time to act like savages- I'm _this close_ ," she put her thumb and index finger close together, "to writing up a disciplinary rebuke in your permanent file!"

The threat did work, though not quite as Hermione intended. If there was anything that could make Draco laugh during that very tense, scary moment it was that. Harry seemed to also be struggling not to smile as he lowered his wand.

"So are you going to let me know what's going on now, or what?" Draco asked. "I already know something's attacking the school."

"We don't really know what it is, but it's been breaking the wards." Hermione told him. "Every time we put them up, the next morning they'd be down. We're trying to keep it a secret that you can apparate in Hogwarts." Hermione explained. "You can understand why we're keeping this quiet- the less people know the better."

"When did this start?" Draco asked.

"We're not exactly sure but Snape was the first to discover the wards were down. He apparated really close to Hogwarts after coming back from your dad's house, I think." Hermione said.

"You mean I didn't have to arrive at Hogwarts riding on that smelly lake?" Draco scowled.

"Priorities, Malfoy." Harry said at him with disapproval.

"Harry, what did you see?" Hermione asked.

"I ran to the forest as soon as I saw the smog." Harry said. "Parts of it was going into the ground, but then it was gone. Nothing else happened…"

"Something had to be happening; we just don't know what it is yet." Hermione insisted.

"I checked the ground and everything as best I could. I don't know what to say... I can't fight something that's not here." Harry replied softly.

Hermione kept biting her lower lip and was looking distraught.

"I'll get Hagrid and Ron to help me search." Harry assured her. "We'll look some more and ask around."

"And I'll be in the library." Hermione told him.

"Don't worry, we'll figure this out." Harry told her.

Draco didn't think she looked very comforted.


	4. A Very Important Delivery

The story of dark cloud hovering over the Forbidden Forest had reached a lot of student's ears, but it turned out that not many people saw it. Draco had heard a few twisted tales of how the fog came to materialize around the school, but because no one on staff was freaking-out and no one was hurt, it wasn't being treated like anything bigger than a juicy piece of gossip.

"There's a gargoyle living in the forest and one of his evil spells went bad!" Draco heard a Slytherin boy gasp.

"No way, I know dragon smoke when I see it!" A girl piped up.

"I bet whatever it is we'll meet it in Care of Magical Creatures. You know Professor Hagrid..."

It turned out the their guesses were as good as anyone elses. Unbeknownst to students and some of the staff, Potter had spent all Sunday patrolling in the Forbidden Forest with Weasley, Hagrid and Fang and nothing amiss had been found as far as Draco knew.

Draco thought it was unnaturally brave of them to seek out a hidden adversary in the most dangerous area near the school, which admittedly irked him to no end. He had spent his Sunday holed up in the castle working on his class-management skills, safe and sound, not doing anything impressive or brave.

But even in his annoyance at the display of Gryffindor bravery and the worrisome fog-event, he began to enjoy his time at Hogwarts. Things were finally starting to get better. Draco had suspected that Snape was coming up with the passwords for the Slytherin dungeon common room, and he had been informed the password was no longer, 'brainless dragon', and had been changed to, 'manicore sting'.

At breakfast Draco had even asked Snape to pass the salt, and instead of being ignored Snape handed him the pepper shaker. That was a victory for their strained relations as far as Draco was concerned.

His first class of the day had even gone well... mostly. Halfway through his lesson the students became unnaturally quiet.

"Why aren't your practicing today's charm?" Draco asked coolly as three girls whispered to each other urgently.

Their eyes went wide and Draco caught sight of a crumpled piece of parchment behind one of his Hufflepuff student's back. He wordlessly held out his hand, trying to use his sternest Snape-impression. Reluctantly the girl slid the parchment to him.

"What does this mean?" Draco asked. Four tallies were under his name as well as four under Harry Potter's.

The girls didn't' speak but watched him closely. It suddenly dawned on him as he stared at the heart-drawn borders that it was a list...of their preferences. Looking up he counted nine girls in his class- that meant someone hadn't voted yet. He regretted finding the parchment too early.

"Ridiculous." Draco said, smoothing his hair down with one hand. "Nothing with Potter's name on it belongs near mine." He said, throwing the list in the trashcan.

He spent the rest of the class wondering which girls had voted against him- not that he valued their opinion… Still, it bothered him that students found his attractiveness tied with Harry Potter.

The day was turning out to be pretty eventful, at lunch a handsome owl dropped a letter the table before soaring off. Draco noticed his father's neat handwriting and hoped to Merlin it was a message of truce. Indeed, it seemed to be so as it was a quick note to meet his father in the staff room. Draco didn't want to encourage his father's antics, but he had grown very tired of bickering with him and thought it best to comply with his father's wishes.

When he opened the door he saw his father alone and sitting on a couch while pulling a disgusted face at the dated, flannel upholstery.

"Hello Draco." his father greeted him.

Lucius stood wiped his robes vigorously, as if the flannel was contagious, and gave Draco an affectionate, sincere smile.

"You've finally forgiven me?" Draco asked. As if it were Lucius' home instead of the staff room, his father ushered him into a low airchair in the corner.

"Of course I forgive you, I have to, you're my only son and heir." Lucius said soothingly. "In hindsight your mother and I should have made a spare...but your mother didn't want to ruin her figure and we were really counting on you not dying. I'm afraid, unlike you, I'm too old to start fatherhood over..."

"I'm so glad we're speaking again." Draco mumbled sarcastically. He hated it when his father threw hints on Draco's childless-status, and the hints were multiplying with every passing year.

Instead of launching into a, 'why am I not a grandfather' inquisition, his father handed him a piece of parchment.

"What's this?" Draco asked, looking at a list of names with numbers next to them.

"Students I took points away from- make sure they're subtracted from their houses." Lucius explained.

"Just what I need, another reason for Granger to hate me." Draco said, folding up the parchment. "You're not a teacher, you shouldn't be pretending to take away house points."

"I'm not pretending if you do it." Lucius snapped at him, his good nature souring. "And when did you start concerning yourself with what Granger thinks?"

"Since she became my boss. I should have known you didn't just come to visit me- ask Professor Snape to do your dirty work." Draco scowled, throwing the list on the table.

"And I should have known better to depend on my son to do- well, anything!" Lucius said, grabbing the list. "I suppose I shall lower my expectations of you further, though it breaks my heart."

"Father-"

The staff room door burst open and rattled loudly causing Draco to jump to his feet in alarm. Lucius, who had whipped around on his heel with his wand out, smiled and tucked his wand back into his robe pocket as Snape flew towards them.

"I am not a girl!" Snape snarled in an announcement.

Draco thought the comment unusual, but his father didn't seem to find it as out-of-place as himself. Lucius stared at Snape, and instead of carrying on with his bad mood, he gasped and clapped a hand to his mouth.

"You're not? Oh my...this is-this is embarrassing-" Lucius said in mock distress. "If only they had introduced Sex Ed to Hogwarts sooner-"

Snape wasn't in a playful mood and his expression grew more and more annoyed. Draco was relieved to see his former professor angry at someone other than him, for once.

"I know you're not a girl, Severus." His father said, dropping the act. "You're going to have to give me more than that to figure out where you're going with this tantrum of yours."

"Don't ever send me flowers again, especially not in the middle of a lesson!" Snape shouted. "It was humiliating- I had to pretend the pedals was an ingredient for todays pepperup potions. 19 batches- ruined! I was forced to give everyone full-marks so they wouldn't check their work."

Lucius' hearty laugh filled the room.

"It's not funny, Lucius." Snape scowled darkly.

"It is funny- don't look at me like that. It's your own fault you're too insecure to be romanced." Lucius laughed. "I swear my intentions were pure, I honestly thought flowers would cheer you up. Those dungeons are so gloomy...and flowers aren't just for girls, by the way."

"Don't do it again." Snape repeated.

"How unfortunate, I've already paid for the delivery of the teddy bear with chocolates. I can't get my refund back and cancelling it would be such a waste." Lucius sighed. Snape looked murderous. "Oh don't make yourself such an easy target, Severus, clearly I'm joking!"

Lucius quickly grabbed Snape's hand and planted a kiss on it. Snape ripped his hand away with his shoulders rising almost to his ears; the sight heavily reminded Draco of a cat that had been pet the wrong way. His father didn't seem phased.

"Father?" Draco started.

"What is it Draco?" Lucius asked in a bored tone without looking at him. He was now trying to grab Snape's other hand and Snape was pulling it out of his reach.

"What's the company you used to send the flowers?" Draco asked. He hoped his father was too distracted to ask him any in-depth questions.

"Please don't torment Severus, he is in no mood for it." Lucius said, misunderstanding Draco's intentions. Draco thought that his father should take his own advice. Snape's lip was curled in anger as Lucius caught him about the wrist and was dragging him into a forced embrace.

"I don't want to send flowers to him, dad." Draco sighed.

"And -who- would you be sending flowers to?" Lucius asked. He didn't really seem to be paying attention though; a sharkish grin was growing across his face as Snape bent backward, silently trying to twist out of Lucius' arms.

"Nevermind." Draco growled. _"I can't even get an answer to a simple question."_

Draco didn't want to stick around long enough to witness anything awkward. He let out a sigh as Snape begrudgingly gave in to his father's embrace and allowed himself to be cuddled. Apparently the Potions Master felt he had put up a convincing enough struggle.

Draco exited the staff room and decided to fill his time by visiting the library. He had fully admitted to himself he had a fascination with his Headmistress, and was excited at the thought of catching a glimpse of her.

He didn't know what he expected, she was telling the truth when she said she'd be in the library. Madam Pince, the librarian, had given her what looked like a 'study corner'. A small desk was set up where books were stacked to Hagrid-height levels. Hermione was in a lounge chair and sticking bookmarks in tomes found in what looked like all parts of the library.

Draco picked up a book off a shelf and scooted just out of her field of vision and pretended to read as he peaked at her over the top of the page. Unfortunately Hermione she wasn't alone; Draco assumed Potter and Weasley were checking-in with their Forbidden Forest report, judging from their mud-splashed jeans and a small twig stuck in Ron's hair.

"-Get your nose out of that book and meet us at The Three Broomsticks." Ron said to Hermione with a smile.

"But we had plans to eat dinner together." Hermione said, looking at Ron. Draco could see the frustration in her face mixed with an undertone of disappointment.

"We'll still eat together... just now with Harry." Ron replied with a half-shrug. He didn't seem to understand there was an issue; Draco smiled.

"Harry, can you-?" Hermione started.

"Ah neat, I was looking for that book." Harry said taking off in the opposite direction.

Ron was beginning to suspect he was in trouble and stared at Hermione with caution. Draco couldn't catch everything she was saying, but from Ron's expression he could surmise that things were tense between them.

"What are you doing here, Malfoy?"

Draco turned abruptly and held up his book like a shield. Harry was looking at him with deep suspicion.

"We're in a library, figure it out pothead." Draco replied.

"You want me to believe you're reading?" Harry asked him.

"That's what these things are for." Draco said with a sneer, holding up the book.

"Well it must be a very interesting book... so interesting you couldn't sit down to read it." Harry spoke, crossing his arms.

Draco flipped the book over and his stomach clenched.

Of all the books he could have grabbed, he had selected the one with the title, _Love and Nature, A guide to bringing out your inner nymph_ , written in loopy gold script.

"Merlin's pants, Potter, you really don't know anything." Draco huffed. Harry's eyebrows rose higher as Draco did some quick thinking. "It's been a national best seller for years." Draco lied with a forced laugh. "But you wouldn't know that, because this a book for cultured wizards."

"Who's the author?" Harry asked. He stepped closer and slapped his hand over the author's name on the cover of the book.

"What?" Draco snapped.

"What's the name of the author of this best seller?" Harry asked.

"If you want someone to read to you join storytime- some of us are busy!" Draco snarled, his face burning as he flung the book on a nearby table. Madam Pince shushed him from her desk.

"Uh-huh." Harry replied, skeptical of Draco's lie. A smirk was playing on his lips and Draco had the urge to punch him. "Well I'm glad you're not spying on us, and I wish you success on finding your inner nymph."

"Go stuff your inner nymph." Draco drawled.

"Out!" Madam Pince ordered him. She had risen from her desk and her mouth was thin with anger. "Both of you!"

"But he started it-" Draco whined.

"I said out!" Madam Pince insisted.

Draco cast a sidelong glance at Hermione, who caught his eye and looked hastily away. The look did not go unnoticed by Weasley.

 

* * *

 

 

The saying "all is fair in love and war" accurately summed up Draco's feelings about plotting his way into his boss's heart. He couldn't be more pleased that Ron Weasley seemed to be failing his girlfriend miserably. Draco knew not taking advantage of that would be a grave mistake; which is why he planned to appear more thoughtful and bigger boyfriend material than the man she was dating.

He considered stealing his dad's romantic gesture of sending flowers. He looked up a few local florists and noted the one with the most expensive delivery costs. The only thing that stalled him from making an order was his own indecisiveness.

Would she care for flowers? Or would she react like Snape, who openly disliked them and believed they were embarrassing? He didn't think he'd ever seen Hermione Granger with flowers before. The only thing he'd seen her admire was books, homework and answering questions correctly in class.

Write an essay on five places you'd like to be kissed. The thought made him shiver, he bet she'd like that assignment, but he was afraid he'd be coming onto her too strong to suggest such a thing. He needed to give her something a little less...overt.

If he bought her a book there was no guarantee that she hadn't already read it or owned it. He recalled the walls of books in her office- if he got her an extra copy of something he'd have to withstand her fake enthusiasm.

That'd be _the worst_.

" _Maybe I can get some sort of idea what she likes by going through her office_." Draco thought.

It didn't seem likely Hermione would leave the library any time soon. Before visiting a florist he wanted to gather intelligence, perhaps he'd find something that would inspire him into finding her the perfect gift. So, after sticking his head in the library to make sure Hermione was still reading (she was), he bounded towards her office.

Before letting himself in he steadied himself for a fresh batch of Luna's zaniness and opened the door to the reception area.

"Hello Draco." Luna greeted him.

She was sitting on her desk while Neville occupied her office chair. Draco noted that Longbottom hadn't greeted him and he was looking nervously at Draco as if he couldn't wait for him to leave.

"Hi." Draco replied blandly. "The Headmistress sent me up to get a book." he lied. "Is her door open?"

"Should be." Luna replied.

Draco strode past them and opened the Headmistress' door.

"Oh!" Luna shouted.

For a second Draco thought maybe she had found out he was up to something. He struggled not to look guilty as she slipped off her desk and rushed towards him.

"You should come to my birthday party." Luna told him.

"He doesn't want to go that, honey." Neville said quickly with an uneasy smile.

"But we're having a bonfire!" Luna explained over her shoulder. She turned to Draco reassuringly, "Don't worry, we're not burning anyone at the stake."

"Why would I...? Nevermind." Draco sighed.

"We'll have lots of food and games too. I hear you're really good at hide-and-seek." Luna said, winking at him.

Luna obviously thought she was swaying him, but Draco held an interest into going for alternative reasons. He gathered that Hermione would probably attend, and if his instincts were correct, a bonfire brought out the romantic feelings in women. He would be a fool to pass up on the opportunity!

"When is it?" Draco asked. Neville was making a choking sound and staring at Draco as if he couldn't believe what he was saying.

"This Saturday." Luna told him. "Your father's invited too. He can bring Professor Snape, of course."

Neville seemed to be in genuine agony at the mention of Snape.

"Sure, they were just saying how much they wanted to go to a bonfire in January." Draco lied. He bit back a laugh as Neville swayed dangerously, looking more and more like he'd pass out.

"Fantastic!" Luna said clapping her hands together. She was completely unaware of her husband's undoing.

Draco left her in her ecstasy and slipped through the door into Hermione's office. Once again, the portraits ignored him except Albus Dumbledore- he didn't seem the least bit surprised to see Draco, and while he wasn't doing anything particularly nefarious, he was uncomfortable with being watched under the former Headmaster's twinkling gaze.

The Headmistress's desk was cluttered as usual. Draco searched for any sort of hint of what Hermione could have interest in; a catalog, a magazine, even objects repeating a favorite color would do. Nothing was jumping out at him.

His search slowed as he shuffled through pages of letters written by parents, some governors, and even a few from his father. As tempting as it was to snoop he was resolved to remain on his key mission of finding hints of what she liked- which he would have done if he hadn't seen a folder with his name on it hidden under a stack of detention slips (unsurprisingly a lot of them were signed by Snape.)

He opened the folder and saw a few class pictures were tucked neatly in the corner with a paperclip. He had seen them before, of course, mostly they were repeats of photos that were hanging in hallways of Malfoy Manor; but a few of them were fresh to him and he recognized them as being used for articles in the Hogwarts school newspaper. (Mostly of him on the Quidditch team.)

A few old pieces of parchment weren't clipped together and were hanging freely in the folder. He recognized them as end of the year report cards.

 _"Why is she looking at my grades?"_ Draco thought.

He was suddenly humiliated of the "T" he got in third year Arithmancy and some of the other subjects he had done not-so-great with in sixth year. Was she investigating him too? He felt butterflies in his stomach as he hid the folder back under the detention slips.

When he looked up, Dumbledore was resting his elbow on the frame with his hand supporting his chin and a knowing look on his face.

"Stop that." Draco snapped at him.

Dumbledore's kind smile widened and he straightened, twiddling his thumbs.

"I don't suppose you'd know anything she'd like?" Draco huffed.

Dumbledore shrugged slightly and blinked lazily.

"You're no help at all." Draco scoffed. He couldn't stay mad, however, not now that he knew Hermione was checking him out; he supposed it wasn't a complete waste of his time. "Flowers it is." he said.

He grabbed a random book off the shelf and exited the room.

 

* * *

 

 

Getting off the school grounds was like stepping into a different world. He was so used the to hustle and bustle of Hogwarts that being anywhere else seemed positively alien.

Things were more surreal as he entered the florist's boutique; he was only used to seeing flowers and greenery in January in Herbology class. The price-range seemed well worth his interest; he had never seen so many lush, blooming flowers in his life. He soaked in the greenery and spender, while secretly admiring the perfumed smell.

"Hullo." a middle aged woman with an Indian accent greeted him, pleased with his awe. She had been watering a bed of roses that were threaded in a wooden gate against the wall, and turned her attention to him.

"I want to send flowers to a girl." Draco said, getting to the point.

"We have just received some lovely white orchids." The florist remarked. She stepped aside and revealed a blooming, white flower in a pot. "Perfect for any occasion."

"No, it's too platonic." Draco remarked, hovering towards the roses. "I need a custom bouquet made, something very elegant and romantic."

"I see..." The florist said looking at him closely. "Any thoughts on what you looking for?"

"The woman it's for is not like other women." He began. "She's smart and ambitious and she's not impressed by ordinary things. I need something that a particularly gifted woman would appreciate- one that might not like flowers but in this case would be impressed by them."

"Hmmm," The florist mumbled in thought. "Usually I get, 'something pink' as an answer. You must really love this girl."

"Just make me the most expensive, romantic thing you can think of." Draco ordered her.

A young woman, perhaps excited with the idea of creative freedom, materialized from behind a counter full of greens and beamed at him. Draco tried not to look alarmed as she silently appeared next to him with the stealth of a cat.

"Where did you come from?" Draco choked. "Were you hiding-?"

"How big can the boquet be?" She piped up, her dark eyes shining.

"Whatever you want, just make it good." Draco shifting away from her.

"Very well," the older florist said, a determined glint in her eye. "Nadi, get me my special sheers...the white ones."

"But auntie, you only use them for weddings and anniversaries no shorter than 50 years!" Nadi gasped.

"This man is counting on us to deliver the best, most romantic, tasteful bouquet ever made ever made by a professional florist's hands." She announced nobly.

"I never-" Draco started.

"Silence, young prince! Let my flowers speak for your heart!" The woman spoke with passion.

"...So do I just leave you with an address or…?" Draco asked awkwardly.

"Nadi will take your information down at the counter." The woman said, her professionalism returned. She motioned him toward the back, where Nadi was practically skipping to the register.

Draco shuffled away from the florist and made his way to the counter in a speeding-walk.

"Last name, please." Nadi asked as he made it to the counter.

"Malfoy." Draco replied with some trepidation.

She keyed something into her computer and smiled.

"Malfoy, you are in our system already I think. 'Lucius Malfoy'?" She asked him.

So his father had used this service. That was good, that meant that the florist had some idea how to deliver the flowers to Hogwarts without an issue, he wasn't sure there were many florists who could.

"I'm his son." Draco informed the girl.

"Should I combine your information? We have a special offer, if you order five bouquets you get your sixth one free." She explained.

"Fine." Draco replied. He figured if Hermione liked flowers enough he might use their delivery service again- only next time he'd just call instead of show up in person.

"Any messages you wish to write to your special lady?" Nadi asked.

"Is it possible to attach a drawing of a dragon on the card?" Draco asked, fearful of her reaction. "I don't want to put my name on it."

"Hema!" Nadi shouted over him in a swoon. "Get your best drawing pen!"

Draco wondered if his father had to suffer through this odd production, and if all local florists lived very strange lives and this was merely their way of coping with the long hours.

"What's the earliest you can deliver them?" Draco snapped. He was itching to leave as soon as possible; the women were clearly crazy, and he was concerned there was something magical in the air that had could contaminate his own mind.

"As early as eight o'clock tonight." Hema announced across the room.

"Make it eight then." Draco ordered her.

He spent five minutes explaining how to arrive at Hogwarts and where in the library to drop off the flowers. Nadi and Hema nodded vigorously, but thankfully didn't make any more humiliating comments.

 

* * *

 

 

The library closed at 9PM sharp, and it was getting more and more difficult to hide from Madam Pince as students emptied the room.

The bouquet of flowers had arrived at eight and they were glorious, but Hermione Granger hadn't been there to receive them. Draco figured she had taken a dinner-break with Weasley and Potter and hoped she would return soon.

...And he hoped she would return soon. Draco suspected the only reason Madam Pince had tolerated a flower delivery in the library is because she secretly wanted them for herself; he was getting increasingly nervous that she might succeed in her attempts to take them..

"We have strict orders to put these on the corner desk." The delivery man said, carrying the heavy bouquet to the study-corner.

"Nonsense, they'll look much better here." Madam Pince said, pointing to her desk with a hungry look in her eyes.

"Sorry ma'am, direct orders from the business owner. She's very..." he coughed, "particular about her work."

Madam Pince relented and Draco was happy to see envy written on her face as she glumly returned to her desk.

The idea of Hermione gushing over his flowers made Draco smile. He frantically checked his watch and wondered if she would be returning; just as he had lost hope he heard Madam Pince greet Hermione.

"You rogue!" Madam Pince gushed as Ron entered the library. "If I was young again…" she sighed. "They're on the table, Headmistress."

Draco shifted with anticipation as he kneeled behind a waist-high bookcase.

"What was that about?" he heard Hermione ask Ron.

"Dunno, cracking up, I think." Ron replied. "She's got be ancient-"

"Oh Ron!" Hermione gasped. Draco popped his head up to see her swaying on her feet. "They're gorgeous!"

She ran to the flowers and her eyes sparkled with adoration.

"I take back everything I said! You do care!" She said, rushing back to Ron.

Draco's jaw dropped in horror. It was hard to gauge who was more shocked, Weasley or himself.

"I love them!" Hermione squealed with delight. She was doing some sort of tug-of-war between looking at Draco's flowers and looking back at Ron.

 _"That trampy rat-bastard!"_ Draco thought, his limbs rigid with anger. _"Tell her you didn't send them!"_

But Ron did no such thing. An outsider could see Weasley was confused, but he was also extraordinarily pleased as she wrapped her arms around him and kissed his face. Even Madam Pince did not interrupt them, though Draco thought they were being very loud.

A dark hatred invaded his heart- that should be him she was kissing and hugging.

He knew it probably wasn't smart, but he couldn't stand by idly while his competition took all the credit for his thoughtfulness. He sprang out of his hiding place (which earned him a shocked look from both Ron and Hermione) and stomped towards them.

"Yes, very beautiful flowers." Draco sneered. "You really splurged, didn't you, Weasley? How did you ever afford it? Take out a second mortgage on your your house?"

Ron's ears turned red and he motioned to grab his wand, but was stopped as Hermione grabbed his wrist.

"Just leave, Malfoy." Hermione told him. Gone was her mirth over his present to her.

"Did it come with a card?" Draco seethed, ignoring her. He searched the bouquet frantically but couldn't find it. Did those dippy florists forget to leave one?

"What are you, jealous or something?" Ron hissed.

"Of a liar like you? Never!" Draco replied.

"You're the one who lies all the time!" Ron accused him.

"What is going on here in my library?" Madam Pince said, showing up.

Draco was now thumbing through the flowers to see if the card had fallen in between them; he circled the vase but his efforts were in vain, there was nothing to indicate who the flowers were from.

"You again!" Madam Pince hissed, scandalized at Draco's behavior. "Headmistress, I must insist!"

"He was just leaving." Hermione said.

Draco straightened, his teeth gnashing together tightly as they looked at him with disapproval. It just wasn't fair that Hermione liked him and didn't even recognize it. He felt unjustly punished.

"Enjoy the flowers," Draco said to Hermione. He shot a dirty look at Ron. "It'll be the nicest thing he'll never buy you."

Feeling defeated, but not ashamed, Draco stormed out of the library.

 

* * *

 

 

Draco ignored the imploring looks he received from students as he pushed them out of his way. He found himself too agitated to speak and had no desire to interact with anybody, so he retired to his quarters. Within seconds a quill and parchment was on his bedspread as well as an inkpot. He had decided to occupy his entire night by writing a nasty letter to the Ministry Department of Business that was sure would put the florist on the streets.

" _Stupid woman didn't even know how to draw a dragon I bet_." Draco thought angrily. That's probably why she didn't leave a card...

His first quill had snapped under his tight grip and laid discarded on the floor. The second one in his hand was bending dangerously as he scribbled, "incompetent", "misrepresentative" and few other disparaging words.

Someone was knocking at his door as Draco was in the middle of creating a poorly drawn dragon on his letter.

"WHAT!?" Draco boomed angrily.

The knocker hadn't said anything, but from blocked light under the door Draco could see that his visitor hadn't left. In a few full strides he crossed the room and wrenched the door open.

Lucius Malfoy stood before him with his nostrils flared, unamused.

"What are you doing in there?" Lucius asked him, tightlipped.

"Nothing." Draco said. "What is it?" He asked, trying to sound calm.

"There's something important Severus and I wish to discuss with you." Lucius told him. "Spare a moment and come down to Severus' office."

"Now?" Draco asked.

"Yes, now." Lucius said in a voice that offered little room for argument.

"Give me a minute, I'll be right there." Draco told him, closing the door.

Could this day get worse? And it had started off so well.

Draco put his shoes on and tidied his hair before stepping out of his quarters with his father. They walked in complete silence to Snape's office, nothing could be heard except for the clacking of his father's cane against the stone floor.

He really couldn't imagine what it was that his father and Snape wanted to talk to him about, so he didn't try to guess. His father knocked on Snape's office door with his cane and opened it.

"Sit." Snape ordered Draco nodding to the chair in front of his desk. Draco obeyed and heard his father close the door.

His father and Snape remained standing as they loomed over him- Draco felt like a student attending a very serious parent-teacher conference.

"This is...ominous." Draco said in an attempt to lighten the atmosphere.

"We've noticed you've been distracted." Lucius said, eyeing Draco closely. "I've just received an interesting owl post..."

From his chest pocket he pulled out a folded piece of paper. Draco took it from his outstretched fingers and recognized it was an invoice for the flower delivery that had been taken to the school library. The florist shop must of had "Malfoy" in their delivery system and assumed Draco's invoice information was the same as his father's.

"We've noticed you spending an increased amount of time with Harry Potter." Snape said in even tones.

"Ah- don't say a word." Lucius said holding up his hand as Draco's mouth opened. "I already know. I was a young man too, once, and I am no stranger to forbidden love."

"You needn't be anxious, Draco." Snape insisted.

Draco wasn't anxious but he was confused. What did Harry Potter have to do with the flower delivery? And why were they acting so serious?

"We wanted to say...that we love you more than we hate Potter." Lucius sighed. "We care about your happiness. There's no need to hide your affections for him on our account."

"Is this a joke!? I'm not in love with Potter!" Draco roared as he jumped out of his seat.

Snape and his father exchanged very puzzled glances.

"But the delivery-?" Lucius spoke, looking at the invoice in Draco's hand.

"That wasn't for Potter! That was..." He started. His father was hanging off his every word. "That was something else." Draco finished.

"Who was it for?" Lucius asked blankly.

Draco couldn't tell them it was for Hermione Granger. The whole misunderstanding was still too fresh and humiliating.

"Nobody." Draco said. "Just forget it."

Lucius' mask of concern dropped and he turned to Snape looking exasperated.

"Forgive me for saying, 'I told you so', but it was a rubbish plan." Lucius said to Snape.

"The plan was brilliant, the flaw rests with you." Snape replied. "...'forbidden love'? How was he to take that seriously?"

"What plan?" Draco asked. "What are you talking about?"

"Severus came up with the idea that if we implied we thought it was Harry Potter you were pursuing you'd be so insulted you'd tell us who it really was." Lucius admitted.

"Wait- so you don't think I'm in love with Potter?" Draco asked.

"Don't be daft." Lucius scoffed. Not discovering his son's crush had obviously put him in a foul mood. "You don't actually believe we would accept Potter as your suitor, do you?"

"I don't know, maybe you-" Draco replied icily.

"'Maybe' nothing, we would disown you." Lucius interrupted him. Snape nodded in agreement.

Slimey, scheming, Slytherins.

It really sucked being on the reciving end of their conniving. He was glad he hadn't admitted it was Hermione Granger who had received the delivery. She couldn't be too far down on the list of his father's "disown-worthy" suitors. Draco was sure he felt much worse than his father as they both stewed.

"You two should mind your own business." Draco scowled. "Find a hobby or something instead of coming up with lame ways to get me to reveal my private life."

Snape didn't seem very offended being told-off but Lucius' nose was crinkling.

"You're 29 years-old and my only child." He said coldly. "I want to see you choose a mate well worth your affections. I want to see this family grow and do well."

"Not this again. I told you I'll have children, but it's not like I have to have them now." Draco sighed.

"Don't wait too long!" Lucius yelled, losing his temper.

"Lucius..." Snape said softly.

His dad took a deep breath in through his nose and composed himself.

"I only meant...I don't know what you're waiting for, is all." Lucius said in much calmer tones. "Are you pursuing someone?"

His dad was studying him closely.

"Yes." Draco said feeling uncomfortable. "I'm pursuing someone. But who it is, that's none of your business."

That seemed to satisfy his father.

"Well as long as you're putting forth an effort... I just don't want to be too old to interact with my grandchildren." Lucius drawled.

Draco let out an anguished groan. Lucius stalked behind Snape's desk and sat down in the chair.

"Won't it be exciting to be a grandfather, Severus?" Lucius asked.

"Thrilling." Snape replied sounding too flat for Draco to be convinced.

"You must have more than one, Draco. I understand your fortune won't have to be split as much if you have only one child, but it's too stressful to rest your hopes of the family on a single person." Lucius told him.

"Alright, father." Draco replied. He wanted to slam his face against one of the jars holding pickled eyeballs resting on Snape's shelf- any excuse not to have the baby-conversation again.

Lucius turned to Snape and observed him critically.

"I would prefer to be called, 'Grandfather'. We can't both be 'Grandfather', so you need to decide something else that you'd like to be called."

"Of course." Snape replied noncommittally. Draco wondered if his father was in denial or really didn't realize Snape wasn't excited about being a grandparent.

"Any ideas?" Lucius asked him.

"Since two seconds ago? No." Snape replied.

"What did you call your grandfather?" Lucius sighed, annoyed.

"...'Grandfather'." Snape replied tonelessly.

"Don't do that- I know when you're being frustrating on purpose, Severus. It's not amusing." Lucius huffed. "Sometimes I think I'm the only person who takes the welfare of this family seriously."

Snape breathed heavily through his nose and caught Draco's eye.

"It will be alright, Lucius." Snape assured him.

"Can I leave, now?" Draco snapped.

"Yes- leave." Lucius told him, waving him away. He looked incredibly unhappy.

Well that made two of them.


	5. Forbidden

_Tuesday, ugh._

Draco kicked off his blankets in a burst of temper. Tuesday mornings meant co-ed teaching Sex Ed with Snape. He wasn't looking forward to tackling awkward sex questions with young teens, but it was a chance to show off some of his classic Malfoy good looks.

His mind kept going back to the list where Harry and himself were tied in attractiveness and in response he was stepping up his grooming habits. He had also been practicing his "handsome teacher" movements in the mirror, some of his signature moves were a slight parting of the lips as he called attendance in a strong, masculine voice, and a sultry hair-flick before demoing a wand movement... those tallies, if ever a vote was repeated, was as good as his.

"Good morning class." He said to his mirror. His voice was the perfect pitch of casual elegance. A small smirk grew on his lips as his mirror replied in a breathless voice, "good morning, Professor Malfoy".

Getting a good breakfast would be an important head-start to his day. He wanted plenty of time to savor a stack of cinnamon pancakes before tackling the unpleasantness of Sex Ed, so he left early and made his way toward the Great Hall. Halfway through his journey his thoughts was interrupted as a frustrated shout boomed,

“Headmistress this is unwise!”

Draco stopped mid-step and flattened himself against the stone wall. At the end of the hallway he saw a scene unfold while remaining the undiscovered audience, it was as if Hogwarts was putting on a play especially for him.

Hermione Granger was speed walking towards the Great Hall with Snape on her heels. Draco could see his mouth twitching in agitation as he followed closely behind her, his robes swishing behind him with their quick pace.

“If you're truly concerned with the safety of the students it is counterproductive to allow them on school grounds-” Snape said in an angry bark.

“Thank you for your input Professor Snape!" Hermione stated over her shoulder, her voice was high and strained. "I do value the opinions of the Hogwart’s staff but my decision on this matter is not open for debate.”

Snape must have been badgering her for quite some time because she looked frazzled and slightly shaky. Snape took two wide strides in front of her, which forced her to stop. He must have felt his intimidation techniques were working on her because he didn't hesitate to loom over her and corner her into the stone wall.

“Then allow me to voice my concern over a different matter- your reputation.” Snape told her in a more threatening tone. “The board of governors and parents will be most disturbed to discover you’ve opened your doors to a werewolf and an ex-convict. You wish to remain headmistress of this school, correct?”

“I wish to position the safety of my students above my reputation!” She replied with defiance. “Remus Lupin and Sirius Black are war heroes as well as experts on the Dark Arts, and I believe their expertise on... what happened is invaluable. Good day Professor!”

She turned her head quickly to leave and the tips of her curled hair whipped against Snape’s face. Draco wasn’t sure if she meant to do that on purpose or not, but he couldn’t stop a chuckle at Snape's reaction. Her hair must have tickled his face because he brushed his large nose vigorously with his thin fingers as he glared at her retreating back. She was walking back the way she had come, and Snape was looking quite insulted at her overly girly departure.

 _"What a woman! She stood up to Snape and lived to tell the tale."_ Draco thought with a grin.

Draco took a few long steps backward because he wanted to give Snape the impression he had just arrived in the hallway and had not witnessed their entertaining fight. He wasn’t sure if his ruse was needed, however, because Snape was in a deep state of hot anger and hadn't paid him any mind.

“Good morning.” Draco said neutrally.

No response came from Snape but his eyes flickered toward Draco. A scowl was frozen on his face.

“Is everything alright?” Draco asked as he tried to look puzzled.

"We'll talk about it later." Snape snapped waspishly. Draco had to suppress a smile when Snape wiped his nose again with the back of his hand.

They walked together to breakfast and Snape informed him their Sex-Ed class that morning was going to be held in the dungeons.

“I’m teaching a contraception potion.” Snape explained. “Be sure to prepare their first exam on Friday.”

They were discussing the contents of the planned exam as they both entered the Great Hall. Draco didn’t expect to see anyone there so early, but there were three people eating breakfast at the staff table. Shabby-looking Remus Lupin was sitting in Hagrid’s seat helping himself to a plate of eggs while Harry was speaking to Sirius Black who was nodding vigorously as he bit into a buttered roll.

Their footsteps echoed in the empty room, and it stopped the happy chattering ahead of them in an instant. Snape and Draco marched to their seats as the Gryffindors regarded them closely.

“Going to a funeral, Malfoy?” Sirius scoffed.

Draco had dressed in all black that morning. He thought it had given him an visual edge, but now he wondered if it looked too morbid.

Sirius' criticizing eye caught Snape’s gold band wedding ring and he laughed. “Or are you mourning the loss of your father’s dignity?” He asked Draco.

“What do you know about dignity, _dog_?” Draco snapped. If he finished breakfast quickly enough he could change and make class on time.

Sirius opened his mouth to respond but Lupin interrupted him.

“-Congratulations on your marriage Severus.” Lupin said to Snape without a trace of malice. “And to you, Draco, for acquiring the Charms position.”

“We have no desire to listen to your false sentiments, Lupin.” Snape sneered as he poured himself some tea. “Especially not while we’re eating.”

The tension was as thick as a trolls brain, but Lupin had disarmed it a bit by starting up a conversation with Harry about the curious creatures in Fiji. Even Harry seemed eager to get back to a normal breakfast and began asking Sirius what ideal vacation spots he should take Ginny Weasley to. Sirius was still visibly focused on Snape and Draco, and he threw mocking glances their way in-between Lupin's forced conversation.

“How long will you be staying?” Snape asked Sirius, interrupting.

"Sirius and I saw a cotterfish eat some poor blokes swim trunks-" Remus said.

“As long as Hermione needs us to.” Sirius replied coldly.

"Hey, that sounds interesting." Harry said.

"’Needs you’?” Snape laughed.

"It's a funny story, Sirius tells it better. Go ahead and tell him, Sirius." Remus urged him.

"Yes, she asked us to be here." Sirius told him.

"He's not even listening." Remus told Harry.

“The Headmistress knows Lupin is completely useless as a ‘protector’ of this school. I suppose he plays heavily on her sympathies and allows him to tag along for the free meals." Snape remarked with a growing sneer.

"Pot calling the kettle black, Snape." Sirius scowled, leaning on the table. "Hermione told us all about Hogwart’s Lucius Malfoy infestation. How many tantrums did you throw so he can trespass on school grounds? Why's he here so much, is he building another Chamber of Secrets?"

“Both of you, stop antagonizing each other.” Lupin ordered them.

Draco could tell Lupin was wasting his breath; the pair was too locked into their conversation to pay any outsiders any mind. Draco continued to eat, in his opinion Snape's morning was more entertaining than Quidditch.

"He's here because he loves his family. You remember what having a loving family is like...or maybe you don't." Snape silkily.

"Yeah, you two are a regular Romeo and Juliet...if Juliet was a creepy, greasy, limp-wristed, wand-swallower." Sirius snapped.

Draco stopped chewing his pancake in mid-bite, Lupin was holding up a hand in weak protest as he whispered, "that's quite enough, Sirius"- even Potter's mouth had dropped open, though he was nakedly amused. Snape, however, was not. His face was the color of spoiled milk and his top lip curled back into a snarl as Sirius grinned, proud of his quip.

Snape whipped out his wand and Draco dove under the table only to knock his head against something hard. Pain erupted from Draco's forehead and he clasped both his hands over it to soften the throbbing. The shouts of Snape and Black flinging curses at each other rang above him.

"Ow." He heard Harry groan.

Draco thought he had banged his head against the table, but surmised he had knocked heads with Harry. They must have dived under the table at roughly the same time and smacked heads. Harry was also rubbing his head with the palm of his hand.

"Did you have to jump under here at an angle? I better not have a stupid-looking scar on my forehead!" Draco yelled in painful frustration.

The table jumped and Draco spotted Sirius' feet dangling off the edge before being pulled suddenly up. More angry voices filled the room and a loud BANG replaced them, followed by Snape's howl of pain. The sound of cups and plates shattering also filled the air.

"Can't I have a normal, boring school day!?" Draco snapped at no one in particular.

"Merlin's beard, they’re worse than ever. No use reasoning with them…" A voice said from Draco's left.

Draco turned to see Lupin crawling towards them on his hands and knees and settling next to Harry.

"You're both fucking worthless Defense Against Dark Arts teachers." Draco sneered.

"And you’re the Charms teacher- know any useful charms, Malfoy?" Harry replied coloring slightly.

Remus held up half of a wand and let out a frustrated huff. The thumps against the table were now showering from end to end.

"It wasn't in the best shape before Severus snapped it over his knee, I'm afraid." Lupin sighed. "Didn't see that coming…simple way to disarm someone really...."

The floor shook and Draco thought it was another curse. He peaked above the table to see Hagrid was running towards them. McGonagall had also just shown up and had lifted her skirts to run towards them. She was livid.

"They are so dead." Draco remarked ducking under the table.

The yelling escalated and Lupin took a chance to pop his head up. Draco and Harry waited in a tense, uncomfortable silence until Lupin motioned for them both to stand.

The reason the yelling had stopped was only because Snape and Black couldn't breathe. Hagrid had them both pinned against him, one trapped under each arm, and the two of them were like two very floppy fish as they bucked against his strong hold indignantly.

"The both 'o ya, tearin' up the place, shameful." Hagrid was saying.

It was common knowledge that Hagrid held Hogwarts in high regard. The staff table was in shambles- besides broken plates, cups, and food everywhere, knives were sticking straight into the table like darts and the Slytherin banner was ripped to shreds. (Pieces of it were strung about the room like sad-confetti.) It looked like forty werewolves had dined there during the full moon.

"The Headmistress will hear about this- you are a guest, Black!" McGonagall said angrily. It was precisely the same tone she used to chide students. Draco had been on the unfortunate end of that once or twice, it wasn't something you forgot.

Sirius wheezed something but McGonagall shushed him. She then marched to Snape who struggled much less when caught in McGonagall's angry flush.

"Squabbling with Black is something I might have expected from you while you were a boy here," Snape looked ashamed once she said 'boy', "but you are no longer a student, you are a teacher!"

The life seemed to have slipped from both of them as they hung from Hagrid's grip limply. For a moment, Draco was scared that they actually had passed out, and McGonagall nodded to Hagrid he dropped them both. Snape caught his balance but seemed preoccupied with catching his breath. Sirius was leaning heavily on the table and didn't notice he had smashed a scone against his hip and it was dribbling jam on his trousers.

"I'm sorry." Sirius apologized, but notably not to Snape. He was clearly trying to get on McGonagall’s good side. Snape didn't offer an apology.

"Clean up this mess before the students arrive." McGonagall responded in a harsh order.

A little more color was coming to Snape's face and he was watching Sirius with caution as the Gryffindor held up his wand.

"I'll help." Draco said to Snape quietly as he pulled out his own wand.

In his school days Draco had mastered cleaning spells since he always hated a dirty Common Room and most Slytherins seemed content to let the place become a sty. His charms certainly came handy that day as they repaired the damage.

Draco spelled the plates and cups to come together as Snape enchanted the banner to ravel its pieces back into it's former visage. Black was sending the food on the walls and on the floor back into the Hogwarts kitchens while Potter was enchanting a mop to scrub the floors of spilled eggs, tea, and Draco's former pancakes.

"Are you alright?" Draco dared to ask Snape for the second time that morning. If last week was Draco's bad week, this one seemed to be Snape's.

"Exceptional." He snapped. "We need to send Black and Lupin back to the abyss."

Draco wondered briefly if Snape was asking for them to commit a murder before waving the thought away. If Snape wanted them dead he most likely would have killed them himself years ago.

"How?" Draco asked.

"We find what's plaguing this school. There'll be little reason for their presence once we solve that mystery." Snape said, his lip curling.

Draco was mending the splintered wood where the knives had been shot into the table. He felt conflicted- he certainly hated Black and Lupin, but his hatred of the Forbidden Forest was very much on par, and he had his own personal stresses to deal with.

"Meet me and your father by the lake after dinner." Snape told him. It must not have even occurred to him that Draco might say 'no'. Or...he wasn't giving Draco the option.

* * *

  
 Draco waited in the Sex-Ed classroom and sent all the students down to the dungeons with the instructions to bring their potion’s supplies. He hung around just long enough for the bell to ring before taking the trip to Snape’s classroom.

When he arrived Snape was in the middle of teaching. Students were packed tight at the tables with ingredients strung out before them. Their instructions for the potion were on the class board.

“I will be grading your contraception potion on looks alone, as it is against school ethics to test it on a student. However, if some of your potion is missing...I won’t question you.” Snape said meeting their surprised looks. “Some of you need it more than you need a good grade.” he sneered locking eyes with a Gryffindor girl whose face was going pink.

It was becoming clear to Draco his presence wasn't really needed to teach the class, but he tried to look busy as the student's worked. He grabbed the attendance sheet from Snape’s desk and began calling out the names of the students. He was very pleased to see some of the students fluster as he looked into their eyes before checking their names off. Once attendance was over, he flicked away a strand of hair from his forehead with a delicate hand-gesture and a few girls in the front row had stopped working to stare at him.

"Draco." Snape said.

He jumped; he had almost forgot Snape was there the man had been so quiet. Draco tried to recover some of his suave looks by tucking a few strands of his blond hair behind his right ear.

"...Are you flirting?" Snape accused him bluntly.

"No!" Draco said louder than he meant to.

Some more students looked up from harvesting their batwings to observe the commotion, but Snape's glare had them hustling to return to their complicated task.

"Why would you ask me that?" Draco asked with a forced laugh.

Snape pursed his lips together.

"Your father does something similar." Snape told him.

An embarrassed heat spread from Draco’s face to his neck and down his back. He blocked the mental pathway Snape had opened about the flirting similarities between his father and himself and deeply regretted not saving his "tactics" for Charms class instead.

There was a definite air of disgust emulating from Snape as he reviewed attendance sheet on the desk.

Draco avoided Snape by picking up the stack of the anonymous sex questions that had been submitted as homework. He got through a handful before stuffing them in his briefcase- he was desperate for Snape not to see them.

Frankly, they were awful and Draco didn’t want to annoy Snape further.

_What size penis do girls like?_

_How many times can you lose your virginity?_

_Can you get pregnant from swallowing semen?_

And one question from what Draco guessed was an especially brave Gryffindor...

_Has Prof Snape had sex with a woman? If no he shouldnt teach us_

A hand shot up timidly and Draco started to walk towards its owner. It was a Ravenclaw girl. Before Draco could reach her Snape had swooped out of the corner and stood before her.

“What is it?” Snape asked in cold tones.

The girl was looking at Draco and back to Snape.

“Um...I was wondering if Professor Malfoy could help me.” The girl asked. She licked her lips nervously.

Snape’s head turned slowly to Draco, as if her request was all his fault. He tried to shrug but his shoulders felt dead. Thankfully Snape was now focusing on the girl.

“You want Professor Malfoy to help you with your potion?” Snape asked her with a sarcastic smile. She nodded. “Do you have Potion’s class, miss Miller?”

“Yes sir.” She replied.

“And who teaches your Potion’s class?” Snape asked his smile souring.

“You do, sir.” She replied.

“So which teacher would be the more prudent choice to assist you with today’s class work?” Snape asked her.

“You, sir.” She replied in a defeated whisper.

Snape closed in on her like a spider entrapping a fly. Draco said a silent prayer for his admirer as Snape hyper-criticized everything she had done, right down to the cleanliness of her nails.

 _"I'll give her extra credit in Charms class."_ Draco thought.

It turned out he'd be handing out a lot of extra credit. Snape was taking out his bad morning on the student's and nearly everyone had been subjected to his nasty mood- even the Slytherins. Snape ordered him to put away the handkerchief Draco offered to a Ravenclaw girl whose potion had turned yellow instead of the instructed deep red.

“You’re here to teach, not be her hero.” Snape snapped at Draco.

The Ravenclaw girl seemed to cheer up a little, even while Draco tucked his handkerchief into his breast pocket with a humiliated grimace.

The class handed in their potions and once the bell rang there was a rush to the door. Someone had even stepped on Draco's newly polished shoes as they ran out of the dungeons.

"Dammit." Draco snapped, looking at the scuff on his shoe.

Snape slinked toward him with a scowl.

"Maintaining a classroom full of teenagers with the attention span of a gnat is difficult enough without your ridiculous flirtations." Snape glowered.

Draco looked at the clock and pointed to it urgently.

"Ah, it’s uh, class o’clock. Don’t want to be late for Charms-cheers!" Draco said with a good-bye wave.

He didn't look behind him as he grabbed his suitcase and ran out the door.

* * *

 

Draco didn't see Snape again until they had met at the lake. His father was also waiting for him and twirling his wand between his fingers, he was wearing an annoyed expression- it seemed Snape had also wrangled his father into coming to the Forbidden Forest against his will.

"You're late." Snape told him as Draco stood before them.

Draco had taken his time at dinner; he never wanted it to end. The Forbidden Forest spooked him and in his anxiety he had nursing his treacle tart for an absurdly long time before forcing himself to get up and go.

"Let's get this over with." Lucius sighed giving voice to Draco’s sentiments.

"We're doing this for a good reason." Snape reminded him as they made their way to the forest.

"We're doing this because Black called you a ‘wand-swallower’-" Lucius chuckled.

"Don't you dare start laughing!" Snape snarled.

"Sorry." Lucius sighed. "This is not how I wanted to spend my evening. You owe me two fun nights in Paris…if we ever survive this horrid escapade."

The three of them walked into the woods in single-file, their wands out as Snape took the lead. Draco was looking through the trees in the distance dreading every step. They had been walking for what seemed like a half-hour until Snape held up his hand.

"Wait." Snape said. He kneeled on the balls of his feet and ran his fingers over a cluster of odd, black flowers.

"Deathblossoms." Lucius said in awe. They had come to a clearing where hundreds of them covered the grass in what looked like a big black carpet.

Herbology was not Draco's strongest subject, but deathblossoms was a plant nearly every student remembered. They often bloomed in places where great tragedies had occurred- mostly on battlefields or in horrific crime scenes. Often they were ingredients well sought-after by potion experts because they were relatively rare, and it was illegal to force a planting of the "seed" so-to-speak. A handful of blossoms per tragedy were the usual.

"Why is there so many?" Lucius spoke, his eyes roaming.

Draco was relieved to discover he was not the only person who was made nervous by the blossoms. Even though they were looking at a fortune on the ground, Draco wanted to be far away from it.

"...Even Potter couldn't have overlooked this." Snape said, straightening. He closed his eyes deep in thought while Draco and his father watched him. "In the Battle of Hogwarts, most casualties happened near the school or on school grounds- not here. It was the most recent war, but perhaps not the most recent misfortune."

"Maybe something happened to the creatures in the forest?" Draco suggested.

"That fog probably has something to do with it." Lucius said.

"The fog must have done something terrible here." Snape said. “But it must not have come into fruition until days after Potter's search. Typical Gryffindor, rushes in without understanding anything...”

"Maybe this is one of the places where the fog touched the ground." Draco recalled. They all looked at each other. A whisper of the wind going through the trees struck an eerie note and Draco shivered.

"Excellent thinking." Snape said to Draco. Part of him almost expected to earn points for Slytherin, but the non-jittery part of his brain reminded him that wasn't important or possible. "If your theory is correct there should be other deathblossom fields nearby. Let’s go. I want to see if we can find one more before we lose all the daylight.”

The three of them were walking tighter together with their wands at the ready. Draco regretted wearing a cloak as it dragged and caught on brambles and branches as they moved along at a swift trot. His senses were on overload, which he felt made it more difficult to concentrate- if they were attacked would he even be able to shout a curse? He wasn’t sure.

Draco felt a spell whirl past his right ear and he stumbled to the ground. His father grabbed his elbow and pulled him to his feet as Snape flung a curse in the direction the spell had come from. An angry shout cut through the air.

“STOP- Put your wands away-”

“That sounded like a dainty girl!” Lucius told Snape.

Hermione Granger appeared behind a thick tree.

“Dainty?” She repeated with a frown.

She wasn’t alone. Soon everyone shuffled noisily on the cold ground and met up with each other, their wands illuminating each other's faces in the newly settled darkness.

“Merlin’s goat!” Sirius scoffed. “It’s just _them_!”

Draco counted seven people, four adults and three children in Hogwart’s robes. Granger, Potter, Black and Lupin were standing with their wands out while three students sulked beside them.

"Is there a veela brothel out here or something?" Sirius growled. "Why are so many people roaming the Forbidden Forest tonight? This is our job!"

"Your job?" Lucius repeated with scowl. "Who are these little bastards?" He waved his wand in the faces of the three children who squinted and cried out as the bright light hit their eyes.

"Third year Gryffindors." Hermione said, shooting a disparaging look at the three of them. They had enough brains to look ashamed of themselves.

"It's practically a requirement of their house to risk their lives to play hero." Snape scoffed.

"We just wanted to help." A blond boy said.

"Help? Are you mad? You're 13 years-old!" Sirius laughed. "You can't help us.”

"Uh...Sirius." Lupin said, clearing his throat.

"No Remus, they don’t understand." Sirius said folding his arms. "I told you, you three can't even go to Hogsmeade without getting your permission slips signed and you think you can waltz into the Forbidden Forest and save the world..."

“...They don’t remind you of someone?” Snape asked him with heavy criticism.

Harry had been keeping silent during Sirius' lecture, and Draco watched with amusement when it finally dawned on Black that the three Gryffindors were a reflection on the mischievous friend-group that graced Hogwarts for generations.

“Uh...I mean, you three could be exceptionally talented, but your parents wouldn’t like you being here-” Sirius started looking sheepish. Lucius rolled his eyes dramatically as Snape shook his head with a sneer on his face. Sirius cleared his throat once more. “Look- we are the only four wizards authorized to be here- so everyone else just go back to Hogwarts!”

"I think not." Snape replied waspishly. "We've discovered something very disturbing in these woods... things Potter has missed. Perhaps he hasn't ventured further than the outskirts of the forest and only plays the role of protector?"

"What have you found out?" Hermione asked eagerly.

"We've been discovering disturbing events ourselves!" Sirius snarled, taking over the conversation.

"Yes- I see a werewolf, a convict, and a glory-hog luring away three little boys and the Headmistress in the woods-" Snape scowled.

"And I see you prancing out here with both Malfoys!" Sirius snapped back. "Getting a bit greedy, Snape?"

"This isn’t the time for this!“ Harry snapped.

"Gentlemen, we are not the only things in this forest." Lupin spoke cryptically.

All of them fell silent and the hairs on Draco's neck stood on end. There wasn't a single swish of a branch or ring of an insect; it was if even the trees were listening to their arguments.

"That's enough sleuthing for today, I think." Lucius announced. Draco was now sure the forest made his father just as nervous as himself.

A rush of wind hit them as if they were on a hill or a mountaintop and blew right through them all. Draco's cloak lifted and fell over his head, but in the gust of wind there was not the usual howl through the trees, but the sound of thousands of voices, all chanting in a loud chorus full of men and women, and children.

"The hell? Did anybody-?" Draco asked, his teeth chattering as he struggled to pull down his cloak.

Snape was crouched low; his body on full alert and his father had put out the light on his wand. The trees looked black against the sky in the dwindling light. Potter was had also crouched low and was taking steady steps towards a green, pale light that had just appeared deeper in the forest.

"Severus- you've already proved yourself more capable than Potter for the Defense position-" Lucius was choking in a hushed, desperate voice. "You needn't chase ghosts-"

_Ghosts? Oh Merlin, anything but ghosts._

A thousand Bloody Barons sprang to his mind belonging to all types and ages of people with blood splattered mysteriously on their robes.

"Quiet!" Snape hissed at Lucius, waving his hand in the air with annoyance.

Draco jumped when he felt a hand clasp his arm.

"Take the students back to Hogwarts." Lupin spoke into his ear.

"What about- who's coming with me?" Draco stuttered. No one seemed to hear him as everyone crept away, their footsteps snapping the branches beneath them. He felt a stab of panic.

"Sir?" One of the Gryffindors said, his voice shaking.

The three students were huddled close and looking increasingly alarmed and their eyes wandered in the darkening shapes around them.

"You three have been paying attention in Defense Against Dark Arts class, right?" Draco asked them.

They all nodded, but Draco felt it was more because a teacher was asking them as opposed to their honesty.

"I'll come with you."

Hermione stood by his side and was looking determined as well as sympathetic.

_Great. Now she knows you're a wimp._

Despite his humiliation he did feel comforted with her presence because he knew she was an excellent asset during a crisis. He could see his father retreating with Snape along with the other group as Hermione grabbed the shell-shocked Gryffindors and pushed them toward a trail back to Hogwarts.

"Best not to speak so much until we reach the castle." Hermione said as she passed by Draco.

That was fine, Draco didn't know what to say to her anyway and he was sure nothing he could come up with would impress her. Draco took the lead, and frankly felt a lot more safe knowing whatever had made contact with them was behind them all. The pace had started off at a walk, but he had forced it into a jog.

When they broke through the tree line Draco was sweating and shaking. The three Gryffindors looked much more stable, as if they trusted the Hogwarts grounds to be a holy sanctuary where nothing could harm them.

"You three are in deep trouble." Hermione told them. "But before we arrange a time to discuss your punishment, I want you all to swear to never speak of what happened here in the forest."

There was a muttering of protest but she silenced them with a loud 'shush'.

"If I hear one rumor, one peep, the three of you will be expelled." Hermione told them. "Come with me, we're going to see Madam Pomfrey- just as a precaution, then you're going to your Common Room."

* * *

 

Draco checked an ornate clock hanging on his wall and pushed down a bubble of worry floating in his stomach. It had been four hours since he had returned to the castle and there was no sign of his father or Snape. He had been taking trips to the staff room and the hospital wing and Snape’s chambers. With every empty room his nerves were getting more and more on edge.

“There’s no one here but the students- it’s late and they need rest!” Madam Pomfrey had told him.

“If you see my father or Professor Snape-”

“If they arrive I’ll make sure you’ll be informed.” She told him.

He had settled into his chambers and had changed into his pajamas, though he was positive he wouldn’t get any sleep.

Would he ever see his father or Snape again? He didn't know if he could handle losing his father and mentor in one night, even if it meant no more Potter, Black or Lupin. He was a nervous wreck and he would continue to be one until they turned up unharmed.

He pulled on his cloak over his pj’s and put on his slippers.

The staff room was empty when he arrived. He knew he would still be antsy if he went back to his chambers so he decided to take one last trip before returning to bed. He trotted down the stairs and walked toward the dungeons. He had a spare key to Snape chambers and was only to use it for emergencies or on rare occasions Snape needed him to swing by and pick something up.

He knocked on Snape’s heavy wooden door hastily before putting the key into the lock and unlocking it. Joy and relief washed over Draco as he discovered the bedroom light was on. He didn’t know if he wanted to hug his father or punch him when he stumbled into their room.

"What the hell!?" Draco roared.

Snape and his father were in bed. Both looked surprised to see him, but Draco was more astonished to see Snape lay down a book he was reading on his chest while his father flipped idly through a special edition of Witch Weekly, highlighting the months most important political people.

In short, they looked like a middle-aged couple relaxing before going to sleep. This made Draco furious.

"You’re both in bed!?" Draco shouted. “For how long!?"

"...Draco, I've been with Severus for years now." His father said, putting down the magazine. “You were best man for Merlin’s sake.”

"I know that- that's not what I meant! Why didn't you tell me you were back? I thought you were dead!" Draco snapped.

"Why would you think we were dead?" Snape asked him. There wasn't a single note of urgency in his voice.

"What happened in the forest!?" Draco asked them, his voice rising in hysteria. There was an annoyingly long pause. "After Hermione and I took the kids and left?" Draco urged.

"Have you been smoking that muggle marijuana again?" Lucius scolded him.

Snape pursed his lips together and flipped his book up to return to reading as Draco gawked at them. In response, Draco crossed the room and plucked the book out of Snape's hands and threw it across the room as hard as he could. He was sure he had their full attention now.

"We were all in the Forbidden Forest, we saw the deathblossoms-" Draco said, ignoring Snape's angry glare. "We ran into Potter. We heard the voices, remember?"

Snape folded his hands on top of his abdomen and stared at him with his dark eyes glittering.

"Forgive me, Draco. My book is much more interesting than this melodrama," Snape hissed. "So if you don't mind handing it back to me..."

"Wait-" Draco said, sitting on the bed. "Would I be this upset if I wasn't telling the truth?"

"I don't know, you've always been an unusually emotional person-" Lucius snarled.

“I am not!" Draco squealed as he stood up.

"-I only know that I want to go to bed in peace." Lucius raged, ignoring Draco's protest. "And for Merlin's sake, hand Severus his book. Your bursts of temper are so unbecoming..."

"Something attacked you both and altered your memories." Draco pleaded. "It's blocking you from understanding that you were in the Forbidden Forest with me tonight-"

"We were not in the forest, we went out to dinner." Lucius told him. He turned to Snape and laid a hand on his arm. “Although you wouldn’t know it judging from how long it took our waitress to bring us menus. The service has been abysmal since they changed ownership-”

"Are you talking about Vincetti’s?" Draco asked.

“Unfortunately.” Lucius huffed.

“You went there last night- you told me wouldn’t go back!” Draco said. "Tonight you were in the Forbidden Forest! You need to remember, you need to tell me what happened to you two!"

"I don't know what you’re babbling about, Draco!" Lucius snapped, finally on his last nerve. "If you're so worried about it then go into the Forbidden Forest and find out yourself! Now stop shrieking at us like a banshee and hand Severus back his book- and don't forget to lock the door on your way out!"

Draco ran out of the room.

* * *

 

Draco’s robe had untied itself and was trailing behind him like a cape as he took the stairs two by two. He was halfway to the Headmistress’ office when he and Hermione met face-to-face, both of them breathless and hysterical. She was in a lacey white nightgown and gripping the railing tightly.

“My father-” Draco puffed.

“Harry-” She gasped.

“-He thinks he was at Vincetti’s-” Draco explained.

“-He was asleep and I woke him up-”

“-Snape just wanted to read his stupid book!” Draco snarled.

“-He thinks I had a nightmare and doesn’t believe me!” Hermione finished. She frowned at Draco. “Books _aren’t_ stupid!” she said haughtily.

Draco rolled his eyes and shook his head as they both caught their breath. Finally Hermione sat on the stairs and Draco followed suit.

"He doesn’t remember anything." Hermione told him as she hugged her knees. Her voice was tight with worry. "I talked to Harry and he's convinced he never went into the forest tonight."

"My dad and Snape wouldn't listen either." Draco told her. "I told them I thought they were dead and they acted like I told them today was treacle tart-Tuesday."

(It actually was treacle tart-Tuesday.)

Hermione took a deep breath and slapped a hand over her eyes. Draco could see she was on the verge of tears. He stood from his step and sat next to her.

“If I close the school down without a proper explanation everyone will think I’m crazy. They’ll all think I’m cracking under the pressure of running this place.” Hermione sniffed. “No one believes me what happened tonight, not even Harry.”

“I believe you.” Draco told her firmly. “We know what happened and we have three other witnesses.”

“But unless there’s definitive proof they’ll probably just replace me and open the school back up.” Hermione said rubbing her eyes. “I don’t know how to fix this, I haven’t read anything that can break wards, cause a strange fogs and winds, and wipe memories. My best guess is that it’s the workings of a very powerful wizard, but what would be the point of all this mess?”

Draco put a comforting arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. He was glad she didn’t push him away. It felt good as they sat there confiding in each other in their pajamas and Draco would have enjoyed it more if the circumstances were different.

“Whatever or whoever it is hasn’t hurt anyone, so it most likely just wants to be left alone.” Draco told her. He didn’t entirely believe his suggestion; the deathblossoms were still fresh in his mind.

Hermione let out a long sigh and relaxed in his embrace.

“Six of the bravest wizards I know went up against it and came back without memories.” Hermione said. “We better hope whatever it is...isn’t evil.”

They sat like that for a long time until Hermione motioned to stand. Draco slipped his arm away and stood, offering to pull her up. She went up a few steps before halting suddenly and turning toward him.

"I want to ask you something." Hermione said in a soft voice.

"Anything." Draco replied. He felt his heart quicken.

"...Ron didn't send those flowers, did he?" She said. "It was you."

"What gave it away?" Draco said with a smirk.

"You were so upset and angry." Hermione told him. "And, well, you sort of popped out of nowhere. Harry mentioned you were spying on us...me..."

"I was just looking out for you." Draco spoke. She licked her lips and his gaze went to her mouth.

He was standing on the lower step, and because he was taller they were standing face-to-face.

He tilted his head to the side and kissed her. Both of her hands had flattened against his chest, and in a soft push she pulled away from him. Humiliation washed over Draco as she stood frozen in her step looking at him with intense worry and confusion, as if he’d transfigured himself into a real dragon.

_You’re an idiot._

“Why did you do that?” Hermione asked him.

_Better pack your bags and start looking for another job...kissing your boss when she has a boyfriend, you’re as good as gone._

“Sorry.” Draco said miserably. “It won’t happen again.”

She leaned toward him and Draco shifted both his arms to cover his ribs and chest- he didn’t think his ego could withstand her throttling him.

Instead she wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her lips to his.

It felt as if a bomb went off in Draco’s chest; he could hardly believe his good fortune. A dizzying warmth overtook him and he deepened the kiss as he pulled her tight against him. There was a hunger inside him for more, he was desperately afraid she’d push him away again and come to her senses and realize she was kissing a Malfoy.

When they stopped kissing she was looking dazed and slightly alarmed.

"I shouldn't have done that!" She said with a gasp.

"But you wanted to." Draco reminded her.

"I have a boyfriend." She said.

"Never stopped me before.” Draco replied. “Shouldn’t stop you either.”

"Goodnight!" She said suddenly, running down the stairs.

"Are you sure you don't want me to stay with you?" Draco asked, following her.

"Yes- I said goodnight!" Hermione insisted without turning around.

“Granger.” Draco called to her with a smile.

She turned.

“Isn’t your bedroom up the stairs?” Draco asked her.

She turned pink and ran past him.

“Goodnight.” Draco sang.

He knew what they both knew- she was smitten.

* * *

 

A/N: I’m going to up the romance between Hermione and Draco in the next chapter. Believe it or not, I had a ton more of this written but this chapter was getting ungodly long.

The next one will be more upbeat and cheery, and a lot of fun.


	6. The Team

There were unintended consequences to no one remembering they had patrolled the Forbidden Forest on Tuesday- mainly that everyone felt it was their responsibility to patrol the forest (again). This was a disaster for Hermione who felt largely responsible for the group for losing their memories and did not want a repeat of what happened (or worse, an injury).

Wednesday morning Hermione had pulled Draco into an empty classroom and told him she didn't want anyone to enter the forest until she figured out how to get their memories back. So she recruited him to help her stave off anyone trying to go there.

"We only need to keep them away until we break whatever spell is ruining their memories, this is the most direct way to understand what we're dealing with." Hermione told him. "They all know what happened, we just need one of them to tell us."

Draco agreed. She could have been suggesting they roll in chimaera dung and light themselves on fire and he would have agreed with her- not that she lacked discernment and her plan wasn't clever- but because no matter how serious or scary things had become at Hogwarts, he couldn't stop himself from becoming absolutely enamored with her. He wanted to be united with her in everything.

He got the impression she felt the same way, because over the next two days she was constantly pulling him to the side.

"Draco!" She said on Wednesday, shouting over the shuffling of students who were travelling between classes. "I mean- Professor Malfoy-" She stuttered as students laughed.

He had pointed to an empty classroom and she nodded while he watched her wade through the sea of students. Draco checked his reflection in the little glass window before slipping inside. She joined him and quickly closed the door.

"Yes Headmistress?" He asked her with a confident smile.

"I wanted to thank you for your support." Hermione told him.

She was being overly formal, but Draco could tell she was jittery and excited. She hesitated and quickly kissed his cheek, opened the door, and disappeared in the crowd.

Not wanting to be outdone, Draco had pulled her to the side later that day.

"Headmistress, urgent business with you please!" Draco said bursting through her office door.

She was sitting at her desk (which looked tidy for once), and two stern-looking wizards were sitting in armchairs facing her. They both turned and glared at him; he had obviously interrupted them during an unpleasant moment.

"My apologies," Hermione said rising from her seat. "Urgent business." She said evenly.

Draco held the door open for her as she sped-walked through it. They met in the empty stairwell away from prying eyes.

"Yes?" She asked, looking up at him.

"You never gave me the chance to tell you," Draco said as he leaned down. He kissed her full on the lips. "You're quite welcome to all the _support_ that you desire."

She tried to fight a smile but lost horrendously. Whatever battle she was waging within herself she was clearly losing, and just to bury the "win" Draco winked at her before descending the stairs with the swagger of a rock star.

He must have left an impression on her because on Thursday she did something rather unusual and daring for her- she interrupted his Charms lesson. Draco was teaching a levitation charm to some of his first year students when he heard a knock on his door. The class turned in their seats and Draco ordered them to practice as the Headmistress motioned for him to join her in the hallway.

"How may I be of service?" Draco asked.

She grabbed him by the tie and yanked him into a long, deep kiss.

"That'll be all." She said in an authoritative tone when she finally released him.

She reveled in his stunned silence before winking at him. She turned and departed, showing him her own rock star strut as her pleated skirt waved him goodbye with every step.

Draco's levitation charm was a little too spirited for the rest of the class, and he had difficulty keeping his feather steady in the air.

On Thursday afternoon Draco ran into the Owlery and kicked out a 7th year Gryffindor couple that was making-out there.

"The Owlery is a place for everybody." Draco said as he shook his head with showy disapproval, "Ten points from Gryffindor for sucking-face in public."

The couple sulked and shot him nasty glances as they departed. He wasn't the least bit guilty that they had gotten to his idea first.

He used the provided parchment and ink to scribble, " _Owlery, now_ " as a message and tied it to his eagle owl's leg.

"Send it to the Headmistress." Draco ordered his owl. It flapped its wings impressively and flew out the window.

He didn't have to wait long until she arrived.

Professor McGonagall looked slightly out of breath and a little annoyed as she approached Draco.

"Mr. Malfoy, I hope this is something urgent?" She said, looking around.

'The Headmistress'- his owl obviously hadn't taken an interest in Hogwarts politics or it would have understood that Hermione was the Headmistress and McGonagall the Deputy Headmistress. Maybe to owls they were both the same thing.

His eagle owl returned, probably expecting some sort of treat, and perched near Draco.

"I...uh...was wondering if you could transfigure my owl to look like that one." Draco said, pointing to a barn owl. He felt a blush coming over his face as he spoke.

She must have really hated climbing all those stairs, because she turned her head to the side to give him a very potent look of anger and disbelief.

"Is there a practical reason for your request?" She asked him in a steely voice.

"This one looks more handsome- it is so much more worthy of the Malfoy name." Draco lied.

It was a terrible excuse to bring her there, but he had to remain committed to his lie. His eagle-owl hooted angrily and its ear-tuffs stood straight into the air.

"Barn owls are all the rage these days." He said. He hoped she wasn't one of those old people who kept up with trends.

"Professor Malfoy, the next time eccentric family duties manifest in your mind, leave me out of it!" She demanded. She stormed out of the Owlery and paused at the top of the stairs before descending them. "I'm getting too old for this nonsense." He heard her mutter.

His eagle owl landed on his shoulder and head-butted him angrily.

"Granger! Granger is the headmistress, dummy!" Draco clarified for his owl.

His owl flew to a perch and shot a stream of crap that Draco narrowly dodged. Making-out in the Owlery seemed much less appealing to him now that he had dodged shit and got a good look at the dirty floor. His owl looked as if it was readjusting to aim another bomb at him.

"Don't act like that! We both messed up- I had no choice but to lie to her about why you brought her here! Do you really think my father would buy me an ugly owl?" Draco asked. His eagle owl turned away from him as he reached out to pet it. "My father bought you because you are worthy of the Malfoy name- and because you're stunningly good-looking, like the whole family."

It hooted and allowed him one stroke before flying into the rafters.

Alright, so his last romantic gesture didn't work out exactly like how he planned- but it didn't turn out to be a total bust. Hermione had a horrendous fit of giggles at dinner that she couldn't explain and she needed turn away to laugh into her napkin every time she caught sight of him. He could only assume McGonagall had reported his insane request to her.

As fun as their game was, an element of seriousness eventually entered their secret "conversations". Friday morning Hermione asked Draco help her to dispel a swearing bookcase (which was real since Peeves was haunting it). After they got rid of the poltergeist with the threat they'd promote Filch if he didn't behave, Hermione explained to Draco that she had purchased a powerful memory-recovery potion recipe that was being transported to the school from Japan.

"Do you think you can talk Professor Snape into making it?" Hermione asked. "It's supposed to be endlessly complicated."

"If I can't talk him into it, I'll convince my father to sway him on our behalf." Draco replied.

"I'll leave that to you, then. In the meantime I'll create a good reason for someone to take the potion." Hermione replied.

So they had their plan, but it turned out so did everyone else.

 

* * *

 

The staff room was as crowded as ever now that they were entertaining two more guests who didn't occupy classrooms during the day. Lupin had settled himself in a low armchair near the fireplace and read books that he borrowed from the library while Sirius spent a lot of his time with Harry and the Gryffindor Quidditch team. If neither was available Black actively searched for Snape to torment, of which Lupin refused to take part in. (Snape had been fending Black off by bringing Lucius with him everywhere he went, so the odds were always 2-to-1.)

Draco kept a close eye on all of them just in case he would need to steer them away from the Forbidden Forest. That Friday afternoon he was sitting on the ugly sofa grading the Sex Ed exam on the coffee table when Hermione entered the staff room with Black.

"You can't patrol the forest tonight," Hermione was saying. Her eyes roamed the room frantically and Draco could tell she was searching for a good reason. Her gaze fell on an old, abandoned umbrella that was propped up against the ancient wardrobe. "Thunderstorms." She said suddenly. "It'd be too dangerous."

"...Okay." Sirius replied; Draco could tell he wasn't entirely convinced her reasoning was sound. "Tomorrow we'll be-"

"-Luna's birthday party tomorrow." Hermione said quickly.

"Tell her I said 'Happy Birthday'!" Sirius replied airily. "Do you think you can join us after cake? Or is it a sleepover?"

She really didn't appreciate Black's flippancy.

"You're not going to patrol the forest without me and that's final!" Hermione announced with her nose in the air. Sirius was stunned as she held onto a breath and without further explanation left the staff room.

"Harry was right, she doesn't seem herself." Sirius said sitting himself down on the arm of Lupin's chair. "Did you hear her excuses? It's like someone used a memory charm on her- she doesn't remember she's the one who begged us to look into this threat in the Forbidden Forest."

_Oh, the irony._

"She must have her reasons." Lupin insisted. He was binding his wand with a fresh roll of Spell-O Tape. "I don't mind visiting her and Harry, but we can't stay here forever."

Draco thought Lupin was right. Despite Hermione's efforts Black and Lupin were eager to do the job they were brought for and move on, and she hadn't exactly been convincing.

 

* * *

 

Thankfully, Draco had a great excuse to be outdoors and keep an eye out for Black and company. The Slytherin team was completely demoralized since their last "win" fell through and Draco, under the guise of concern and good leadership, gathered the team near the outskirts of the forest for "extra practice".

"Everybody, come close." Draco said, clapping his gloved hands together.

The Slytherin team was standing outside the edge of the forest and looked at the trees curiously. They were already shoulder-to-shoulder and vying for warmth between them as Draco pointed to a trail of lights he had had set up around the lawn. It looked like an airport runway was snaking around Hogwarts.

The boys watched him, shivering in their practice clothes.

"You're here because we have a problem- you need to win all your Quidditch games if we're going to come in first place for the House Cup this year." Draco told them.

"Gryffindor says we cheated and that we didn't really win our last game." Terence Bocher, a fifth year boy with broad shoulders said. "That's why we didn't get house points for it."

"Is it true, sir?" Dan Greer asked.

"Of course it's true, you guys are shit." Draco told them honestly. Their faces fell. "But that's why you need me as a coach."

"Harry Potter coaches the Gryffindors." Bocher spat.

"Yes, but was Harry Potter ever a professional Quidditch referee?" Draco asked with a grin.

The boys stared at him blankly.

"He wasn't...I was." Draco said. The boys were now looking at each other for answers. "Nevermind." Draco groaned.

"Can you coach us so we can be on the school team?" Their keeper, Faramond Hackett, asked him.

"You guys are already on the school team." Draco replied.

_Merlin, Slytherin is dim this year._

"No, the Hogwarts team." Greer said as if that should mean something. Draco must have looked confused because Bocher spoke up.

"Every year they put together a Hogwarts team to play against different schools." Bocher explained. "They take the best of all four houses."

"No one from Slytherin's been picked for years." Alec Saxby, their beater who was missing a few teeth, spat.

"When did they start doing that?" Draco asked. A shadow fell on the team's faces. "Potter's idea, right?"

"Gryffindors are always on the team. Always." Greer said with a sour note.

Not even new brooms could stop the team from looking pathetic as they hung their heads in dejection.

"That changes this year." Draco said. "That's why you're here on this bloody frigid night- come on; you're not going to let a bunch of pansy Gryffindors take your spots, will you?"

"You said it yourself, we're shite." Saxby swore. Mumbles of agreement rose from them.

"You're shit now, but after you go through my vigorous training schedule they'll draft every single one of you." Draco promised. "When are the tryouts for the Hogwarts team?"

"February."

"A month is plenty of time." Draco assured them. "You just have to train every night, that's all."

"Every night in this? Our arses will freeze to our broomsticks." Saxby huffed.

"I'm tired of your sass-mouthing Saxby- now everyone get on your brooms!" Draco ordered them.

The team mounted their brooms and looked eager to begin. Something about the cold air and being on a broom outside the Quidditch field had finally charged their enthusiasm.

"Tonight we're going to work on your broom handling. I've created an obstacle course, and each of you is going to fly between the lights. If you fly outside of them you'll get a nasty shock." Draco told him. "I mean that literally, it'll shock you, so do it right."

"Wait uh-" Saxby started. "I have to go to the bathroom-"

"Saxby! You want me to replace you with a Gryffindor!?" Draco yelled.

"Can you do that sir?" Saxby asked.

"This training is highly specialized and sought after- so yes!" Draco said. (He was actually making it up as he went along.)

"Sorry sir!" Saxby apologized, looking remorseful.

"Get on that broomstick and ride!" Draco snapped. "Go, everyone, now!"

He clapped his hands loudly and the team nervously began to kick off the ground and fly. It didn't take long before he heard the alarmed screams of pain.

"Focus Saxby!" Draco shouted as a figure on the distance toppled over and landed on the ground.

It turned out Draco's instincts were right- a half hour later into "Quidditch training" Black, Lupin and Potter were crossing the lawns, followed closely by Snape.

Hackett was the first to finish his lap and was slowing down at the "starting line".

"Hackett, tell everyone go around three more times, then practice is over." Draco told him.

"Saxby's covered in burns; three more laps might kill him, and we can't get his hair to stop sticking up … he's not a very good flyer." Hackett laughed.

"Three more laps and if he's not dead take him to the medical wing!" Draco shouted, running away.

The group of Gryffindors and Snape was almost at the edge of the forest and Draco had to run to catch up with them.

"We don't need your 'help' Snape!" Sirius growled as Draco paused in front of them. "Keep your big nose out of our business."

"The Headmistress insists that I be present for any excursion in the-" Snape began.

"That's tollshit, you just want to tag-along so you can ruin everything like you ruined Remus's wand." Sirius said. "Go away! You can get lost too, Malfoy!"

It was true that Snape had ruined Lupin's wand. The Spell-O Tape seemed to be keeping the wood together but it had begun sparking dangerously at the seams.

"I think I'll have to sit this out." Lupin admitted. A wisp of smoke was coming out the end of his wand and it smelled vaguely of cabbage.

"It seems a slot has opened in your little brigade." Snape mused. "I'm going with you. Potter's incompetence has disgraced Hogwarts long enough." Harry scowled.

"I'm going too." Draco announced.

"Whatever, if you get in our way I won't be responsible for whatever happens to you." Sirius said. He and Harry slipped into the forest in the lead.

They began to march into the forest and Draco knew he needed to get them out- fast. He didn't want to meet whatever it was that erased their memories or get caught up in something dangerous that he knew they couldn't handle. He looked around for inspiration to come up with a plan, but he had little work with- the only thing he saw was trees.

_If I knock someone out we'll have to turn back._

If he could cause a branch to hit Black or Potter in the head it might be good enough to get them to turn back without thinking they were being attacked. It would look like a freak-accident.

Draco waited until a strong wind blew through the trees. It took five minutes but finally a gust whistled through and under his breath he muttered an incantation causing a tree-branch to whip Sirius in the face.

"SHIT!" Sirius shouted as he staggered backwards on his feet.

The branch wasn't big enough and didn't hit him hard enough but it did cause everyone to stop marching deeper in the forest.

"What happened?" Harry asked.

"Fuck- right in my eye!" Sirius said through clenched teeth. "Bloody branch went into my eye it hurts like hell!" Sirius explained. He cursed again. "Oh Merlin, it feels like something's lodged in it-"

Harry went to Sirius' side but Snape got there first.

"Out of the way, Potter!" Snape sneered, pushing Harry roughly. Snape stood in front of Sirius, his eyes glittering. "Kneel."

"Are you serious?" Sirius asked him.

"Very." Snape snapped. "Show me your eye- or not, if you trust Potter to be of better assistance with your injury."

"And what do you know about eye injuries?" Sirius scoffed.

"I'm a potion's master; I've seen plenty of healthy and damaged eyeballs." Snape drawled.

Sirius slowly got on one knee in front of Snape, his hand still covering his left eye.

"If this is some sort of trick you'll regret it." Sirius told him anxiously.

"As much as your disfigurement delights me I'd rather us not suffer a handicap in such a dangerous place if it can be avoided." Snape replied simply as he swatted Sirius' hand away.

"We should head back." Draco suggested.

"It's most likely nothing, just a bit of debris." Snape said. "Black has always been prone to theatrics."

Black's jaw clenched but he seemed to accept Snape's help as his eyelid was forced open with Snape's thumb. Snape took a quick intake of breath through his mouth.

"What?" Sirius asked. He looked nauseous.

"I was wrong… it's very badly damaged." Snape said with a horrible smile. Harry tried to peek over Snape's shoulder but Snape shifted, blocking Harry's view. "I don't know how much I can do for you. In my professional opinion, it may have to be removed."

"Are you taking the piss?" Sirius let out in a strangled growl. "Harry, how does it look?"

Snape leaned closer and grimaced as he touched the bottom of his eyeball through his lid. "Ah...yes, there's a deep rip here... If you allow me to wash your eye, I'll get rid of all this puss, for all it's worth."

Sirius' jaw was working and Draco could tell the Gryffindor was adjusting to his new fate. Snape angled his wand in Sirius' face and a soft jet of water washed over it. Snape then handed Sirius a handkerchief from his robe pocket.

"Keep it covered...if only to spare Potter's delicate psyche from a disconcerting sight..." Snape remarked. Sirius held the handkerchief in his hand, frowning. "What?"

"This is clean, right?" Sirius asked. "You didn't wipe your nose on it?"

"I don't remember." Snape replied.

"Can we leave now?" Draco sighed.

To his relief Potter didn't really seem enthusiastic about trudging on and agreed that they should reschedule for a time when everyone in their party was free from being seriously maimed.

"Come on; let's see how bad it is." Harry said. He put an encouraging hand Sirius' shoulder as they headed back to the castle.

Draco still wanted to keep tabs on Black and Potter just in case they voiced when they were going to go back into the forest. Curiously enough Snape stuck with the group all the way to the infirmary.

Madam Pomfrey was trying to put a large jar of ointment on a shelf when they arrived.

"Merlin give me strength. I've been hustling for the past hour treating burns, now you show up." Madam Pomfrey said. She spotted Sirius' covered eye.

"Professor Malfoy-"

Draco turned and saw Saxby lying under a heap of blankets in a nearby bed. One of his hands was bandaged and he was reaching out. Perhaps he was under the impression that Draco was on staff or Madam Pomfrey.

"Professor Malfoy...shocks...if fall off broom…" Saxby muttered.

"Shhhhhh…" Draco said, pulling up the blankets until they covered his mouth. If Hermione thought he was abusing students it'd be really bad for their blossoming romance. "It was all a dream, don't speak." he whispered in Saxby's ear. "It was Greer's fault." He added for good measure.

Thankfully everyone seemed too preoccupied with Sirius' injury to notice the unfortunate Slytherin.

"Alright Black. Sit." Madam Pomfrey ordered Black nodding to a padded table.

He hoisted himself up. His hand was still clutching the handkerchief to his eye.

"It could be ugly." Sirius warned her. He slowly dropped the handkerchief and winced. "It was full of puss and-"

"Scratched cornea." Madam Pomfrey announced seconds later, lifting up his eyelid.

"A scratch?" Sirius repeated. "Are you sure?"

"I've been doing this for quite a while, Mr. Black." She said. "I'm sure."

"It's not a deep scratch?" Sirius asked blankly. "I won't lose it?"

"Of course not!" She said. "It'll heal on its own in a few days, but I can give you some eye drops if it's causing you a lot of discomfort."

Draco laughed, which set off a chain reaction of Sirius jumping off the table and stomping towards Snape.

"You greasy git!" Black roared.

"Mr. Black!" Pomfrey gasped. "Lower your voice at once."

"You greasy git." Black repeated to Snape in a quieter voice.

"I washed it and told you to cover it." Snape said with an oily grin. He turned to Madam Pomfrey. "Is that not the best course of action?"

"You told me there was a deep rip in it!" Sirius growled. "Was there even any puss!?"

"Puss?" Snape repeated. "We're remembering this exchange differently, I'm afraid. I believe in your terror your imagination was running away with you..."

"You made me believe I was going to lose my eye, you arsehole!" Sirius screamed in his face. Still Snape's grin remained.

"Watch your mouth, Black." Snape said softly. "Might I remind you that you're in a school and are beholden to school rules. Your bad language, as well as you, clearly don't belong here. Don't you agree Headmistress?"

Draco hadn't seen Hermione arrive, but he supposed Madam Pomfrey had fetched her during Black's ranting. She was looking grim and angry.

"I told you not to enter the Forbidden Forest without me." She said to Sirius. "And now you're fighting with Professor Snape- again."

"I can see why you're upset with me but you don't know the whole story yet." Sirius insisted defensively. "Snape's being a twat, right Harry?" He asked.

Harry looked massively uncomfortable at being dragged into the conversation but he nodded.

"Black has done nothing but cause problems since he got here, I cannot think of a single reason for his presence." Snape pointed out to Hermione. "Tonight your 'war hero' went toe-to-toe with a tree this evening and lost."

"That's not what happened!" Sirius snarled.

"No- I don't want to hear anymore." Hermione said, throwing up her hands. "All you two do is fight and I'm sick of it. From now on you're both banned from speaking to each other."

Sirius made a very rude gesture at Snape.

"Headmistress!" Snape growled.

"He's such a tattletale." Sirius said to Harry.

"Fighting through Harry still counts as fighting with Snape!" Hermione said completely exasperated. "Not another word. Go to your rooms!"

Snape and Sirius shared a look of utter loathing before exiting the room.

"Can I talk to you for a moment, Professor Malfoy?" Hermione asked taking Draco aside. Harry frowned but didn't interrupt them as she settled near an empty hospital bed.

"Was Sirius attacked?" She whispered.

"Yeah, by me." Draco admitted. "And I couldn't have asked for a bigger drama queen to halt the search."

"Thanks for taking care of it, I guess." Hermione said.

"Malfoy...shock..." came a soft raspy voice.

"Did someone call your name?" Hermione asked.

"I don't hear anything." Draco lied. He quickly pulled Saxby's curtain closed to hide the reaching, bandaged hand from Hermione's sight.

"...I'm going to pretend whatever that was didn't happen because I need you to focus on this." Hermione said.

She pulled out a small scroll from her robes and handed it to him. Draco was sure it was the Japanese potion recipe.

"You can count on me." Draco assured her.

"I know I can." Hermione said with a smile. A groan pierced through the curtain and her smile wavered. "He's alright, isn't he? I won't have to talk to his parents, will I?"

"He'll live." Draco said, though he wasn't entirely sure if that was true.

"I'd give you a kiss for all your gallant deeds today but Harry's watching." Hermione told him. "I can't tell you how grateful I am knowing you're on my side."

"We make a great team." Draco agreed.

"Well...see you later." Hermione said.

She left him to join Harry, who was watching their interaction with interest. He asked Hermione something and she seemed to brush him off.

Draco couldn't shake the feeling that Potter knew something was going on between them.

 

* * *

 

Draco could confirm that the scroll was indeed Japanese. It looked pretty and he considered putting it up on his wall to give his room a more cultured edge, until he looked at the bottom and saw an illustration of a sad, crying, nondescript creature being cut up in tiny pieces.

Even though it wasn't the most inviting artwork to adorn a bachelor pad it was invaluable in the sense that he was desperate for Snape to discover and brew its contents. He had been wondering if he casually should pull it out at breakfast to show him, but it turned out Snape had skipped breakfast.

After eating a bite of toast and tea Draco wandered down to Snape's quarters and found him packing up potions supplies.

"There you are." Draco said, knocking on his door. "Where are you going?"

"I'm headed to the manor. You should visit your father so he doesn't bother me while I work." Snape replied.

Draco thought that was probably best. He hadn't seen his dad in a while and if he went too long between visits his father had the bad habit of turning up at the most awkward times. Draco helped Snape gather his supplies and they apparated together on the Malfoy Manor's doorstep.

"After you." Snape said.

Draco understood why Snape had wanted him to go first. When he opened the door he was nearly knocked over as two Irish wolfhounds slammed into his legs and ran past him. Snape scowled as the dogs danced around him, waving their paws excitedly in the air as the potion's master lifted his bags of ingredients out of reach and shuffled to get away from them.

"Call the dogs off, Lucius!" Snape shouted hoarsely.

"Just pet them, Severus! Give them some attention and they'll go away!" Lucius called from the kitchen.

"I can't- I'm holding supplies!" Snape explained. He stomped into the hallway and laid down his bags. "Why do we own so many blasted animals?" Snape snapped as one of the dogs licked his hand.

"Because they're cute, and they protect us." Lucius teased. His father had walked into the hallway and spotted Draco. "You brought Draco!"

"Hi father." Draco greeted him. He was in the middle of petting the hounds so Snape wouldn't have to, a sentiment he was sure his mentor appreciated.

"Staying for the day?" His father asked him.

The hounds had finally left them alone and had retired to their normal resting place in the drawing room near the fire. Draco saw Snape wipe his hands on his robes and make a beeline for the cellar.

"No, just stopping by." Draco replied.

"I'm thrilled you did, you can finally pick up your mail. I left it in a pile on the counter." He said, waving his hand.

Draco entered the kitchen and saw a huge pile tucked into a corner. He discovered most of it consisted of junk mail, though there was a lot was magazines. He frowned as he flipped through them and his irritation grew the deeper he searched through it.

"This is getting extreme, you know these aren't mine." Draco snapped.

"But they have your name on them." Lucius remarked.

"I didn't order them. Somebody else must have." Draco snapped, his eyes unblinking when his father met his gaze.

Draco held up a copy of Wizard Groom for his father to inspect. Lucius shrugged.

"Perhaps your new girlfriend ordered them." Lucius replied.

"My new girlfriend ordered wedding magazines to send to my father's house?" Draco said. "That's what you're asking me to believe?"

"Merlin's god, Draco, I don't know what to believe. There are a lot of crazy women out there and I haven't met your girlfriend, so I can't be certain she'd do something like this- can I?" Lucius snapped.

"You're getting worse than that loopy florist." Draco said, dropping the magazine in the pile. "I'm going to talk to Snape."

A couple years ago their cellar had been converted to a room for Snape to brew potions when he wasn't at Hogwarts. It was one of the areas of the house that Draco didn't feel welcome, and sure enough he felt he was intruding as he walked down the stone stairway.

Snape looked behind him as Draco's footsteps echoed in the quiet, dimly lit room.

"I brought you along so you would stop your father from interrupting me." Snape told him.

"I need your help with something." Draco said. He clutched the paper scroll firmly and joined Snape at the worktable.

"Can't it wait?" Snape asked. He was gutting some sort of animal and his hands were slightly bloodied. Draco tried not to look as his mentor pulled the intestines out of something furry.

"Not really." Draco replied.

"You're not in trouble, are you?" Snape asked him.

"No." Draco said. _Not any more than usual._

"Then spit it out, what is this about?" Snape asked him bluntly.

"I need your help to impress a girl." Draco said. He supposed it was true.

Snape stopped working and turned around. He crossed his dirty arms across his chest and frowned.

"You want me to help you impress a girl?" Snape repeated. Draco nodded. "I'm afraid I'll be little use to you, as I haven't been skillful in that area...ever."

"But you can be, because there's this potion I need help brewing but it's very difficult. And I need it brewed as fast as possible." Draco said, holding up the scroll.

He must have piqued Snape's interest with his odd request. Instead of saying 'no', Snape wiped his fingers on a wet towel before taking the scroll in Draco's hands.

"A Japanese wood-block print. The ingredients will need to be imported." Snape mused. He looked at Draco suspiciously. "This is a bizarre way to impress a girl."

"Can you brew it?" Draco asked ignoring the criticism.

"You think very highly of my academic prowess- I don't read Japanese. I don't know yet." Snape replied. "What sort of potion is this?"

"A memory potion." Draco said.

"I've got memory potions in the cupboard behind you." Snape said. He handed the scroll back to Draco. "Help yourself to one of them."

"No, this one is different." Draco insisted. He held out the scroll for Snape to take.

"Why do you need one that is 'different'?" Snape asked him.

 _"He's trying to wheedle the truth out of me and at this rate he'll know everything."_ Draco thought. _"Quick. Think sad thoughts."_

"...Because the other ones didn't work." Draco said softly. He looked away, focusing on the disemboweled animal on Snape's worktable.

 _"Snape did that to an adorable kitten."_ Draco thought trying to choke up. _"A fluffy one with little white paws…"_

"Something bad happened to her but she can't remember it." Draco explained. He was pleased that he sounded sufficiently upset. There was an awkward pause.

"Very well, get it translated and I'll see what I can do." Snape said.

"Thank you." Draco said.

"I have lots of work to do. See yourself out." Snape replied, returning to his workstation.

 

* * *

 

Draco wanted to tell Hermione that he had succeeded in his task, but she was keeping herself extremely busy to cover for her excuses of unavailability to Sirius. Luna was under strict orders not to let anyone see her, not even him.

"Sorry," Luna apologized as she blocked the office door with her body. "You're still coming to my party, right?" she asked.

"Yes." Draco said.

Instead of waiting around for Hermione, Draco devoted a lot of his day to "normal" Quidditch training with the Slytherins and they seemed thankful for it- especially Saxby whose burns had healed nicely. Even though last night's training methods were unconventional it seemed to breathe new life into the team- possibly because they never wanted to run his obstacle course again.

Before night had fallen he saw Hagrid hauling heavy blocks of wood in the middle of the Hogwarts lawn with Potter and Weasley helping him. Draco was travelling to the Slytherin locker rooms when he overheard Harry speaking to the half-giant.

"Hagrid, what are these?" Harry asked kicking the ground.

Draco paused and saw Potter had spotted a scorch mark caused (most likely) by Saxby.

"Dunno." Hagrid said, scratching his head. "Jus' saw 'em today. There's a whole bunch over by tha' corner." He said waving around a sharp curve by the castle.

Harry and Ron bent and observed the marks closely. Draco smirked; they probably thought the marks had to do with whatever was haunting the Forbidden Forest. He decided Potter and Weasley really was a pair of numbskulls.

After Quidditch coaching Draco had an extra-long bath and spent an unusually long time preening in the mirror. His magic mirror and he was developing quite the special bond, "she" seemed rather excited that he used her so often and was now giving telling him when his shirt wasn't tucked in all the way or a hair was out-of-place.

"A Malfoy is never on time, he is always fashionably late." He told his mirror.

Draco waited a half hour after the start of the party before going to the lawns. Even though it was cold the outdoors were beautiful. There was three large bonfires roaring at once, but someone had also bewitched roaming, colored lights to whizz above their heads. A "Happy Birthday Luna" banner floated by sluggishly and looked in danger of being caught on fire as it rested alarmingly close to one of the fire pits.

Draco strolled toward the bonfire to find Potter and Weasley drinking hot cider and sharing a laugh together. They were surprised to see him as he warmed his hands by the flames.

"What are you doing here?" Weasley asked.

"Don't you know how to read? I'm here for Luna's birthday party." Draco informed him, gesturing at the floating banner. "This must be an answer to your prayers, Weasley. Free food and a fire to sleep next to!" Draco laughed.

"Why don't you hang out with your dads- they're they only ones who want you around, Malfoy." Harry replied, jumping to Ron's defense.

"Wrong! I was invited- unlike your opinion." Draco snapped back at Harry with a scowl. He held up the gift he'd brought. "I think I'll give this to Luna directly, wouldn't want it to go missing...who knows how Weasley is paying his livelihood these days?"

Harry had to physically hold Ron back at Draco's comment. It was very satisfying to hear Weasley stutter over his words in a temper. He let out a laugh to further annoy his nemesis and searched the multiple bonfires for his love interest.

He thought if Potter and Weasley was there that Hermione wouldn't be far away, but she didn't seem to have arrived yet; so as he waited he figured he should deliver on his promise to hand his present to Luna directly.

Finding Luna was absurdly easy. She was wearing a tall birthday hat decorated with strange pins. The Hogwarts Crest was the most recognizable (and normal) along with the Ravenclaw crest, but Draco shook his head in disbelief as he spied one of a house-elf (that danced) and even one of a blast-ended skrewt. If her weirdness wasn't so unquestionably authentic, he'd swear she was trying to be strange.

Luna was in the middle of telling a very wild story judging from her audience's' reaction. He knew his patience wouldn't outlast her tale, so he tapped her on the shoulder and she broke off mid-sentence, turning to him.

"This is for you." Draco said holding out her gift.

He was aware that there was an air of disapproval for interrupting her, but he didn't really care for the company she kept so he wasn't terribly bothered. Neville was looking anxious and stern as if Draco had handed her a box full of Voldemorts, and he plucked the gift out of Draco's hand while muttering an insincere 'thanks'.

"You're welcome, Luna." Draco said looking Neville in the face to prove his silent point.

Luna grabbed the present out of Neville's hands and turned to the group she had been speaking to.

"Who wants to see what Draco got me?" Luna announced cheerfully.

Draco felt embarrassment as no one said a word, just stared at the two of them.

"Excellent!" Luna chirped, as if a hundred people had cheered them on. She pulled back the wrapping paper and Draco tried not to be angry that Neville pulled his wand out. "Oooo! Lovely!" She cooed.

Everyone leaned forward and Luna held up a pair of gold-plated, moth earrings.

"They seemed like something you'd like to wear." Draco mumbled with a shrug. He really didn't expect so many people to be scrutinizing him or his gift so closely.

She was removing her current earrings and putting them in the gift-box. Within a few seconds the moth earrings were dangling from her ears- combined with the hat she looked positively insane, which Draco supposed was prevalent in her fashion tastes.

"They're wonderful!" Luna said. Draco stiffened as she leapt forward and gave him a hug.

He never pegged Neville Longbottom for the gutsy-type, but he was shooting Draco a glare that was inexplicably a warning. Draco awkwardly patted Luna on the back and she let go of him. Another person grabbed him and spun him around. It was Hermione.

"Ladies, stop manhandling me." Draco whined as he was dragged away from the light and the warmth.

When they were out of earshot Draco grinned.

"Couldn't wait for a little moral support?" Draco asked.

"About that..." Hermione started. Draco's heart sank. "Harry told me what you said. You're picking fights with Ron on purpose."

"I can be perfectly civil if people are civil to me, you know that." Draco replied.

"You could also be a lot nicer to everyone." Hermione said, though the argumentative tone had softened.

"I'm nice to the people who deserve it." Draco said. "Potter and Weasley like to play the victim but they're just as nasty. They assumed I wasn't invited to this party, that's how little they think of me. They're not as saintly as they'd have you believe."

"I know what they're like better than you." Hermione replied. "And I also know you're not as saintly as you'd have me believe either."

"Maybe, but I get things done, unlike Potter." Draco replied, changing the subject. "Today I got Snape to agree to make the potion."

"That's wonderful!" Hermione proclaimed. She turned to the bonfire in the distance and stiffened. "Sorry, I'm supposed to be scolding you. I shouldn't look so excited."

"I'd be excited to meet you in an empty classroom for a good scolding." Draco said wiggling his eyebrows.

"Stop that." Hermione sighed.

"Why?" Draco asked.

"Because...it makes it harder. I feel so guilty when I see him." Hermione said, looking at something Ron-shaped in the distance. "It's different when Ron isn't around; it's easier to forget that I'm with him. But when he's here I can't ignore what we're doing is wrong."

"I wouldn't waste guilty feelings on Weasley." Draco replied.

"You don't feel guilty at all?" Hermione asked him.

"Not really." Draco replied.

"So you're not bothered that you're the 'other guy'?" Hermione asked. "You're not worried I'll come to my senses and drop you?"

"If you came to your senses I wouldn't be the guy that you drop." Draco said.

"How can you be so confident?" Hermione asked him.

"We both know I'm the better man." Draco said.

"Sorry, I should have asked, 'how you could be so arrogant'." Hermione replied.

"You love Weasley and he might love you, but we both know he's a terrible boyfriend." Draco said. She looked resentful of that comment. "I know what I'm talking about- I'm a Malfoy, we're taught to read people."

"So being a Malfoy makes you some sort of relationship expert?" Hermione said crossing her arms. "It's amazing that you think you know my relationship better than me."

"Not better than you, because we both know the problem." Draco replied.

"I know I'm going to regret asking this, but what's 'the problem'?" Hermione asked him.

"That Weasley is a selfish and lazy boyfriend." Draco started. "You probably shoulder all the responsibility and affection in your relationship while he does whatever he pleases. He acts like a child and he takes you for granted."

"There's no such thing as the perfect person." Hermione said defensively. "He cares about me and loves me, that's important."

"Love is just one part of a relationship." Draco told her. "Being good at loving is just as important and we both know he's shit at it."

He had stunned her into silence, which he wasn't sure was a good thing.

"I'm not worried that Weasley is your boyfriend, because you're too smart to stick with a parasite like him. Maybe he's a good match for someone else, someone who can just give and give and doesn't need much in return, but you want to be treated like an equal. You want someone who is at your same level give-and-take."

"Someone like you?" Hermione replied. She was completely distressed, he knew his words had hit too close for comfort.

"Of course." Draco replied, watching her closely.

"Quick-" Hermione gasped. She turned to Draco and put on hand on her hips. "I don't want to hear you starting any more fights, understand?"

Draco looked up to see Harry and Ron approaching them.

"I already have a father at Hogwarts, I don't need you telling me how to behave." Draco snapped.

"Just do what you're told for once!" Hermione huffed.

"Everything okay?" Harry asked.

"Everything's fine." Hermione told him.

"You missed cake." Ron informed her.

Draco saw him stuff a large piece of it in his mouth and shot Hermione an incredulous look. Two red splotches rose to her cheeks that he was sure had nothing to do with the chill.

"Ron, could you please eat like a grown-up?" Hermione asked.

"It's cake." Ron replied defensively, as if that clarified everything. "It had a cartoon crup drawn on it in icing."

Hermione shook her head in a long-suffering way.

"I'm going to wish Luna a Happy Birthday." Hermione said as she brushed past him.

A spasm of frustration crossed Ron's face and turned to Draco looking furious.

"You better not be bothering her or you'll have me to deal with." Ron warned Malfoy.

"Too little, too late, Weasley." Malfoy said with a grin. He left them to ponder exactly what he meant.


	7. Date Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: A few changes have been made. I had to change the rating of this fic from T to M, because this chapter does contain graphic sex. If you're the sort of person who doesn't want to read that sort of thing, my apologies. Just keep scrolling down until the word "penis" no longer catches your eye.

He wanted to take her on a date. A proper date.

Stolen glances, seductive sweet nothings and the occasional make-out session was exciting and fun, but Draco wanted more. He liked her too much to let what they were building become just a physical thing; he wanted to spend time with her, which meant he had to have a safe place to talk to her.

That would have been simple if they weren't a forbidden item. Checking over your shoulder every five minutes didn't create the proper atmosphere to foster a relationship and Draco was tired of worrying about being interrupted, discovered, or arousing suspicion.

So he decided to ask her out on a date away from Hogwarts.

He knew the perfect place to take her; the Sunday edition of the Daily Prophet was stuffed with ads, and that morning he pulled out a section that highlighted the most popular nightlife venues for witches and wizards. There was a shining review of an elegant dance club in London he thought was very promising.

He set the Daily Prophet down on his bed and went into the bathroom for a shave and to get dressed.

His mirror had become oddly sentient, and lately he had stopped undressing in front of "her". Draco knew it was silly; most people would probably replace her with a less self-aware one, but she was becoming something like a dotty, affectionate roommate to him.

"Today's a big day for me." Draco said to his mirror as he slipped on his shoes. "I'm going to ask Hermione out. How do I look?"

"Handsome as always." his mirror said. "Though if you don't mind me saying so, the dragonhide shoes go better with those robes."

"Good call." Draco said as he kicked off his shoes and walked to his closet. He retrieved the dragonhide ones and put them on. "How did I ever live without you?"

"I don't know, dear." His mirror said as he walked out the door.

Draco crossed the hallways and whistled as he went up the stairs on his way to the Headmistress's office. He quickly stopped his tune as he was running out of breath and passing out while whistling was high on his list of embarrassing situations.

"What does Draco have to do with anything?" He heard Hermione's voice echo down the stairwell.

"You know, that's a really good question." Potter replied.

Draco stopped walking. They sounded close. There wasn't enough time to go all the way down the stairwell without being seen- Potter would see him and know for sure he was eavesdropping- but if he stayed they would run into him.

He spotted a suit of armour dutifully standing in a space cut into the wall, above it was a torch blazing light on the steps.

 _"Let's hope this works or I'll look like an idiot._ " Draco thought. He squeezed himself behind the armour and laid his back flat against the wall. Moments later Harry and Hermione stepped into sight. They paused in front of him, possibly to talk to each other in the light.

"I feel like every time I turn around he's lurking in the shadows." Harry said, crossing his arms.

Draco prayed that Potter wouldn't notice the suit of armour had four legs, two of which wearing very expensive dragonhide shoes.

"Don't be ridiculous!" Hermione laughed. "We're adults, do you really think he'd do something as childish as spy on me?"

"You mean like he did at the library? Hermione, we run into him  _everywhere_ , and the way he looks at you is starting to make my skin crawl." Harry admitted.

"It's all in your mind. Draco sometimes asks me advice on how to run his class, he's a first year teacher after all." Hermione lied.

"I don't think so." Harry said. "McGonagall told me about what she saw before our staff meeting, and with his spying on you in the library and your frequent chit-chats, clearly he wants something from you. Tell me what's going on."

"I know we've been through a lot, but not everything that happens to us at Hogwarts is a conspiracy." She replied.

"I don't want you to lie to me anymore. If you don't trust me enough to tell me what's going on, it hurts, but I'll accept it." Harry said gravely. "Just give me an honest answer to this...is he hurting you?"

"No." Hermione said firmly.

"He's not blackmailing you either, is he? Making threats?"

"No, he's not hurting me or blackmailing me." Hermione sighed. "He isn't the evil, spoiled rich-kid we knew in school- he's just a normal person."

" _Evil, spoiled rich-kid?_ " Draco mouthed angrily. " _Just a normal person!?_ "

"I wish I could believe that." Harry replied.

They began to walk down the stairs again and Draco listened as Potter whined, until his voice was a whisper and finally silent. With some effort Draco begun to squeeze himself out of the cramped space, but paused when he heard a pair of footsteps coming towards him. He tried to go back but he was stuck.

"What are you doing?"

Filch was scowling and Mrs. Norris was settled tightly in his arms, hissing. Draco let out a sigh of relief; Filch wasn't the worst person to be caught unawares behind suits of armour.

"Looks like trouble." Filch said, his beady eyes falling on him.

"No," Draco insisted, wrenching himself free and steadying himself on the step. "I'm just...cleaning." He said. He pulled on his tie and began to rub it over the gauntlet.

"Cleaning?" Filch repeated suspiciously.

"Yeah, there was this really dirty spot in the back." Draco said. Filch was looking from the suit of armour back to Draco. "It's gone now." Draco added.

"...'Bout time one of you professors chipped in!" Filch huffed. "The stuck-up lot of you are as ungrateful as the students, no one cares how orderly I keep this place. I'm not even invited to the staff meetings!"

"Because you don't teach anything." Draco said.

"I do too! I teach self-respect, something most are lacking in these walls! A little flick of your wand everything's done for ya, well you never build character unless you're working with your hands." He said.

Mrs. Norris meowed in agreement, even though Draco was sure she had never worked a day in her life using her paws.

"I'm going to go." Draco said. "No reason to be here now the armour's clean."

"Yeah…" Filch said, recovering his temper a bit. "You be sure to tell the Headmistress what a good job I'm doing!"

He wondered if everyone thought he was on close speaking terms with Hermione.

* * *

  


Draco wished he had something that could tell him where Hermione was instead of combing the castle all the time for her. He had checked the Great Hall, only to be told she was in the infirmary for a headache, and when he went to the infirmary Madam Pomfrey informed him she was called away by another professor on business.

" _They should invent something like a map of this school that tells you where people are._ " Draco thought. He tucked the thought away to revisit later.

His last stop was the staffroom, which he tended to avoid because the company found in it. Sure enough when he walked in the room Potter, Black and Lupin were laughing together as they shared a plate of eclairs that was undoubtedly pilfered from the kitchens. Draco scowled.

"Great, it's one of them." Sirius said. "Clear off, Malfoy, we're having fun."

"Where should I go? The forest? But the trees will attack! Ow, my eye!" Draco said clasping the side of his face in mock terror. "I'm blind!" he sniffed.

"Don't be a brat or I'll tell your father; he'll be sure to give you a spanking," Sirius scowled. "After he's done spanking Snape, of course."

Harry laughed and even Lupin grinned, though he hid it with a hand.

"Think that's funny do you?" Draco sneered.

"After the queasy feeling passes- yes." Harry laughed.

"Good one." Sirius said to Harry with a smile.

"Thanks." Harry replied. "Based on a true story."

"Shut up!" Draco growled. "Professor Snape and my father are better men than you'll ever be!"

Harry and Sirius exchanged skeptical glances before laughing again. Draco felt his neck getting hot under the collar and his hand was itching for his wand.

"Alright, that's enough you two, leave him alone." Lupin said. His tone suggested disapproval but Draco saw he was close to laughter.

Draco was hardly aware that the door had opened until Professor Trelawney and Hermione crossed the room.

"My dear-" Trelawney said in a misty voice.

"Headmistress." Hermione corrected her.

For a flash Trelawney looked annoyed, breaking her aura of mystique.

"Headmistress," she said in a half-hearted tone of mystery. "I know we've had our  _disagreements_  on readings of the unseen world, but I feel in my bones I must deliver a message from the other side..."

"Is it doom?" Hermione asked deadpan.

"DOOM!" She bellowed, her shawls slipping as she threw up her hands.

"Woah." Sirius said, astonished.

"This is nothing." Harry said irritably.

"I saw a mighty dragon," Trelawney sang, her eyes growing wide, "and a woman… the one he loved."

Draco was a skeptic when it came to fortune telling, but he couldn't help but notice the similarities of her prediction coinciding with his life.

"She died, the dragon burned her and was driven to madness-" Trelawney went on, pleased by her enthralled audience.

"Message received, Thank you." Hermione interrupted her. Obviously Hermione wasn't drawing the same conclusions as Draco. "Harry, did you ever get a response from Mr. Clark about replacing the snitch? You mentioned the old one has a bent wing and the game's next Saturday."

Trelawney glared at Hermione as she gathered her shawls around her. Sirius started a slow clap but Remus grabbed his hands.

"Yes, well, I'll be leaving I suppose." Trelawney huffed. "Glad to know the Headmistress is keeping us all safe here in the material world!" She left with her head up high and slammed the staffroom door shut.

"Merlin, I love this school." Sirius laughed. "Moony, Harry, I have an idea for a prank." he said with a devious grin. Lupin rolled his eyes.

"Hey." Draco said called softly to Hermione.

Hermione looked at Harry before going to Draco's side, it seemed Sirius was keeping Potter distracted enough. Draco caught something about 'hiding in the classroom' and 'misty voices' from Black's excited babbling.

"Make this quick, Harry's been asking a lot of questions about you- I think Ron put him up to it." Hermione whispered. "What was it you wanted to tell me? Is the potion brewed?"

"Er- no." Draco said. He felt a little foolish to be bothering her with something frivolous instead of their all-important mission. "I was actually wondering if you'd go out on a date with me tonight?"

"A date?" She said. He felt a nervous pang in his stomach until she smiled at him. "I'd love to. When? Where?"

"Meet me in your office at 6 o'clock. Wear something elegant but not too constricting, and comfortable shoes- we're going dancing."

"Okay!" She said, looking as excited as Sirius sounded. "I'll see you at six."

* * *

  


Each hour passed three times as slow and felt slower every time he checked the clock. He had been ready since four o'clock and sitting in her office since five. He found it less painful to stop looking at the clock altogether and busy himself by snooping through official school records.

He was drawing black-eyes and missing teeth on Potter's schools photos when the door opened and Hermione waved shyly.

She looked better than he expected.

Her hair was pinned up and she was wearing a black dress with a sweetheart neckline. The length rested just above her knees, giving her lots of freedom to dance without flashing any observers.

"You look like a million Galleons." Draco told her. He stood up from the seat and kissed her on the cheek.

"And you look very sharp." Hermione said, brushing her hand over his shoulder.

"Thanks, my mirror has exceptional taste." Draco told her. "I wanted to wear something gray, but she had suggested a black suit with silver accents."

"Oh... okay." She said. He could tell his comment went way over her head. "Where are we going?"

"The Cut Rug." Draco told her. "It's got an old fashioned dance scene. It's a wizarding club so we can get there by the Floo Network."

"Sounds perfect." She replied.

"Ladies first." Draco said, leading her over to the fireplace.

* * *

  


It turned out The Cut Rug was  _the_ place to be on a Sunday night. Their waiter led them to their table and brought them water as the band set up in front of a very large dance floor. Wizards and witches of all ages and backgrounds were chatting excitedly and were wearing their classiest outfits. Of course "classy" was in the eye of the beholder.

"What do you mean I'm out of dress-code?" A wizard in a yellow coat and hat argued with a frustrated staff member.

"That's a costume." The staff member insisted.

"The bag it came in said 'suit and coat'." The wizard said.

"Yes- it's a Muggle costume." The staff member said. "It says, 'Dick Tracy' on the back in big, red letters."

"That's the designers name!"

Hermione chuckled until she spotted a goblin in a cocktail dress pass them by.

"Alright ladies and gentleman and all you other unspecified charmers," spoke a smooth-voiced man in the microphone. "We're gonna start off with your favorites from the 1940's and work our way to today's hottest dance hits, so grab your partners or catch the eye of that lovely creature across the room and  _cut the rug_!"

Horns blared in a quick dance number and people started pooling to the dance floor. Draco guessed there was a large amount of regulars; he spotted couples that had no fear pulling out their best moves.

"Can we dance?" Hermione asked, her eyes shining.

They watched a man flip a woman in the air and have her land in his arms.

"Yes, but just so you know, I can't do that." Draco replied. Hermione laughed, but he was entirely serious.

Draco had taken really boring dance classes (thanks mum) so the slow-dances were pretty familiar to him, though a lot of the faster paced things left him a bit flustered. Hermione was a good dance partner, though, she made him forgetful of how he looked and soon they were dancing together with wild abandon.

Not wanting to break the mood, waiters and waitresses occasionally danced in the crowd with water on their trays for people to grab. Draco thought this was dangerous though, because more often than not they spilled everywhere. It didn't seem to matter, as people were appreciative of being doused with cool water or be lucky enough to drink before it tipped so they didn't have to get off the dance floor.

"I need a break." Hermione said after a few hours of vigorous fun.

Her face had turned red from dancing so hard with him. Draco was also sweating in his clothes and liked the idea of catching his breath. He motioned to their table, which now had two glasses of champagne sitting on it. Draco pulled out her chair for her and when she was seated he sat down.

"This is magnificent!" Hermione proclaimed. "How did you know I liked to dance?"

"I remember how much fun you had at the Yule Ball." Draco said.

"You were watching me?" She asked.

"Everyone was." Draco recalled. "I vividly remember watching you walk arm-in-arm with Krum. Pansy Parkinson couldn't stop talking the whole night about how it wasn't  _really_ how you looked, that your hair was always doomed to be bushy and your teeth large. I think she was frightened that sweet Gryffindor-Granger would strike the fancy of us Slytherins forever."

"The Slytherins fancied me?" Hermione said skeptically. "Now I know you're making this up."

"For the rest of the year Crabbe and Goyle kept asking me if I thought you were pretty. They were asking permission from me to openly think you're gorgeous." Draco said with grin.

"But you were all so mean to me!" Hermione laughed. "I never would have guessed."

"You really have no idea how much power you have over us, do you?" Draco marveled.

She seemed at a loss for words and let out a hesitant smile.

"It's criminal how little Weasley cares for you." Draco said. "You're free to choose whatever life you want, of course, but I think it's a tragedy he won't let you know how special you are."

"You're too good to be true." She said. "I hope you haven't used that line on too many girls, because I'm in danger to succumbing to your flattery."

"Us Malfoys have our faults, but if there's one good quality the men in our family have, we love our women." Draco said. "And Snape." he added with a grin.

"Maybe this isn't the right time to ask, but since you mention it…" Hermione said. "What happened to your mother?"

It was like a punch to the stomach but Draco was determined not to flinch.

"As you know, we were in the middle of Voldemort's war… it was hard on us like everyone else, but I don't think people understand the fallout can be just as hard. Father says trauma manifests in different ways. I guess she needed kinder surroundings." Draco said gently.

He hadn't really answered her question but he was certain she could sense his sorrow. The band sounded louder in Draco's ears as she covered his hand with hers.

"I'm really sorry." She said. He could tell she meant it, which made swallowing the lump in his throat that much harder.

He nodded and tried to smile though it felt like it had turned into a grimace. She looked at the band and got up from her seat.

"I think one more dance would be nice." Hermione said.

He stood and immediately allowed her to lead him to the dance floor. He was gracious for the distraction, and when he reached out for her hand she slipped both her arms around his neck and pulled him close.

"I'm having a lovely time." She said as she rested her head against him. "I'm glad you asked me to be here."

Draco wrapped both his arms around her waist as they rocked softly to the music.

"You deserve it." He replied.

"I don't want to go back to Hogwarts." Hermione admitted. "I know I have to, but I'd rather stay with you."

"Then stay with me." Draco replied. "I don't want to let you go."

The song ended and people were clapping. The next song started up, but it wasn't a slow song. People were beginning to bump into them as they stood in each other's arms.

"Stay with me tonight." Draco said. His heart was pounding quickly; it had been a while since he had asked for the company of a woman.

"I want to but I can't, it's too risky, someone might see us." Hermione replied regretfully.

"Not if we go to Malfoy Manor." Draco said.

"It's our first date." Hermione started.

"It's not like that. We've known each other for years." Draco yelled over the music. She still looked unsure. "I'm not expecting anything from you, we can just go to bed and sleep if you want. Or more. I just don't want to end the night without you."

"I'm not ready to end the night either." Hermione said. "Let's go."

* * *

  


"Are you sure your father isn't here?" Hermione asked Draco looking up at the enormous mansion. "Or Professor Snape?"

The night air was great against Draco's hot skin. He didn't realize how hot the club was until he was outside; he almost didn't want to go inside as he led Hermione to the porch.

"They either spend the entire weekend here or at Hogwarts." Draco told her. "The lights are off, they're not home so they're not coming back tonight, I promise."

Draco unlocked the door by dispelling a few wards. When he opened the door two very needy dogs flew towards him.

"No- get down!" Draco ordered them as the wolfhounds slapped their paws on his shoulders and wiggled. His rebuke did nothing to stop their greeting. "Sorry-" Draco apologized to Hermione as he patted their heads. "They're not very well-trained."

"Just like their owners." Hermione teased.

"But they're very affectionate." Draco said as the dogs licked his face and hands. "Just like their owners."

The hounds retired to their bed and Draco offered to take Hermione on a tour of the house, which she refused. She admitted to being very tired so he led her up the stairs and down a long hallway and stopped at the third door on the right.

"I haven't redecorated since 5th year." Draco warned her as he put his hand on the doorknob. "So if it looks like a 15 year-old boy's room, that's because it is."

When he opened the door and turned on the lights, she entered and threw her shoes in his closet.

"You don't have to worry, it already smells better than a 15 year-old boy's room would." Hermione said looking around.

Draco didn't tell her it was because their family owned a house elf that cleaned everything from his dirty dishes to his socks. It was better for her to assume he was tidy.

Hermione looked around the room as she sat herself down on his bed. He had a few African masks on the wall that had lost their powers, as well as some posters of Quidditch players and a few shelves full of numerous souvenirs from past vacations.

"I'll find you some suitable pajamas." Draco said offered.

He went to his pajama drawer and pulled out a black t-shirt with the Slytherin crest on it.

"Heresy!" Hermione laughed. "You can't put me in that, I'm a Gryffindor."

"Everything I own is Slytherin." Draco remarked. "It's this or…"

"Or what?" Hermione asked.

"I can put you in one of Snape's nightshirts." Draco said with a grin.

"Boy, that would get me in the mood...of never wanting to have sex again." Hermione teased.

"Well we can't have that." Draco replied. He returned to searching through his drawer and pulled out a plain green t-shirt for her to approve.

"Alright, that's fine I suppose." Hermione said. She stretched out her arm and he threw the t-shirt to her.

He dug through his underwear drawer for a while before pulling out a pair of silver boxer shorts.

"You are determined to dress me up like a traitor!" Hermione laughed.

"It's all I have!" Draco said.

"I don't believe you. No one is that devoted to Slytherin, not even Salazar himself." Hermione said getting off the bed. She rushed over to his underwear drawer and giggled. "Oh my god, you were telling the truth." She said pulling up a pair of briefs with snakes on them. "I'm not sure how to feel about this."

"You should feel honored. The snake that goes into those is even more worthy of devotion." Draco said.

"I'll be the judge of that." She said smoothly. She dropped his briefs in his underwear drawer with a single finger.

Draco felt a jolt of excitement zap him in the pit of his stomach. He barely registered that she was holding out her hand for him to give her the shorts. He handed them to her and she trotted over to his bed.

A long time ago his father had tried to have "the conversation" with him. It had happened after he was practicing Quidditch in their backyard and his mother had remarked that he was growing into a man. After his practice his father had taken him aside and offered him very strange advice.

"Now Draco," his father started. "One day you'll have a very special woman in your bed and she'll be expecting a performance worthy of the Malfoy name. You must be a gentleman in every sense of the word. ...Do you know what a gentleman does?"

Draco was completely at a loss what answer to give, and frankly, more than a bit embarrassed to be having a their conversation. Draco had shaken his head in the negative.

"He remembers his manners." His father answered for him. "A gentleman opens a door for a lady and allows her to enter the establishment first. He also pulls out her chair and allows her to be seated first; he does not talk about himself but instead focuses on her. These lessons translate quite well in the bedroom. Always remember to be attentive and  _allow the lady to come first_. Do you understand?"

"Yes Father." Draco lied. His father's advice sounded more like an archaic guide to dating then a proper discussion on sex.

"There's a good man." Lucius had said.

Draco hadn't really thought much on that conversation since, but what was once confusing and vague advice really did seem invaluable as Hermione turned her back on him and struggled with the clasps on her dress.

"Remember your manners." Draco said to himself.

He was about to ask her if she wanted any help when she finally got the clasps off and wiggled out of her dress. It fell into a pile on the floor and he was momentarily stricken dumb as he was greeted with the sight of her lacy underpants that didn't totally cover both of her cheeks.

She unhooked her strapless bra with master control and pulled the green shirt over her head. Something finally kicked in his brain that she might not have wanted him to watch her, and with intense discipline he turned his back on her and began to undress.

"I can call in a substitute for you so tomorrow morning we can sleep in." Hermione told him.

"That'd be brilliant." Draco replied. His thumbs didn't want to work and it took him twice as long as usual to unbutton his shirt.

On his way to pulling off his trousers, he noticed with some distress that he was sporting the hardest boner he'd ever had in his life. He imagined what her reaction would be if she spotted it.

" _It's okay, we can just go to sleep."_ He imagined himself saying as she noted his raging erection.  _"No pressure to have sex, really. This? Oh that just happens sometimes. Before we go to sleep I have to use the loo- if you hear anything don't worry, it's just me wanking to the fantasy of fucking you into the floorboards."_

He heard her climb into his bed and he hurried to turn out his bedroom light. He then walked over to his window and opened a curtain. The moon was bright that evening so a slip of light entered the room, enough for him to see her outline clearly but not enough for her to see his "excitement". She was fluffing up a pillow and she threw back the covers for him to climb inside.

He got under the covers and he kissed her on the lips softly.

"Goodnight." She whispered.

"Goodnight." He said back.

They laid in silence and Draco tried not to let the tidal wave of disappointment destroy him. He knew it wasn't fair to expect sex from her, but he couldn't help but think she had expressed clear interest in it.

His eyes adjusted to the darkness and he could see her eyes were closed. It was too hard to look at her and know he couldn't have her, so he rolled on his side and instead looked at the wall.

He tried to focus on something to bring his libido down- Quidditch, some of the dark artifacts his father had sold through the years, even Snape's long, gray nightshirts. He was just beginning to gain control when he felt Hermione's hand rest on his hip.

" _That woman is making this impossible._ " Draco thought. Her perky arsecheeks covered in lace floated into his mind and he thought he might actually have to excuse himself to the restroom to take care of himself if he had any hope of getting sleep.

The hand, it turned out, wasn't finished its journey. Two of her fingers had slipped under the elastic band and was slowly slipping its way to the front. Her fingers brushed against his pubic hair playfully.

"So about that snake…" she whispered. "Exactly how worthy is it of my devotion?"

"You should find out." Draco replied.

He let out a low groan when her fingers closed tightly over his shaft; she was feeling the entire length and girth of him, from the bottom to the sensitive top. He hoped it didn't disappoint her. After a few moments of feeling him up, he rolled around to her and saw she was looking at him with just as much desire as he felt.

"Do you want more?" Draco asked.

"God yes." She replied.

"Stay here, I'll get protection." Draco told her.

"It's okay," she said grabbing his shoulder. "I'm on the pill."

He pulled his shirt off and his shorts and threw them over the side of his bed. She mimicked his movements quickly. As tempted as he was to start penetrating her, he knew a gentleman would make sure she was ready for him.

He first caught sight of her breasts. They were white with rosy-pink nipples, and they seemed ethereal to him in the moonlight. He kissed her cheek softly and trailed down from her jaw, to her throat, to the middle of her chest, and finally he closed his lips around her nipple. He felt her chest rise in a gasp of pleasure.

His tongue lapped against the bump before sucking on it tightly. Her hands were tangling in his hair and she was squirming underneath him.

Not wanting to neglect the other side, he released her from his mouth and a thin trail of his saliva stuck to his bottom lip all the way to the other nipple. He worked on the other nipple diligently, being sure to move his tongue as he sucked.

She seemed very responsive to his oral fixations. He slipped his finger-tips between the lips of her vagina and they came back wet. He kissed her nipple before straightening and looked down at his love partner.

Her eyes were half-hooded in dizzying pleasure. She wasn't faking any enjoyment, he was certain of that. She was watching him with smoldering intensity and he made sure she got a clear view of him popping the fingertips that had touched her in his mouth.

He didn't blink as he slid back near the edge of the bed. She was breathing hard in anticipation as he lowered his face near her pelvis.

"That's right." he whispered. "You know what's coming."

He pulled back the lips of her vagina, baring all, and with his thumb he pushed up slightly so that her clitoris came out from it's hood as far as it could go. He pursed his lips together and a ball of his spit dropped on her clit. He spread the spit around on it with his tongue. In response, she was making the most delightful, encouraging moans.

She was melting into him as his tongue-play turned into sucking. She was getting really wet and his chin soaked. He felt as if he was eating her scent as he broke off his concentration from her clit and went to her opening. He stuck his tongue inside of her and lapped at the walls.

"Oh god, Draco, please-" She groaned.

He looked up and raised his eyebrows questioningly.

"I want to feel you and if you keep going on like that, I'm afraid I won't get to." She explained in a breathless voice.

He wiped his chin on the bedspread and climbed up to meet her face-to-face. His penis had been leaking pre-cum and it didn't need any lubrication as he guided it into her tight opening.

Bliss was the only way to explain it, and it wasn't just because of the physical. Hermione Granger was looking at him as if he was some sort of god-  _he_  was the deliverer of pleasure; it was  _him_  who had made her quiver with unbridled sexual gratification. They shared a look of mutual adoration.

He began to pump into her, though not exactly slowly because they were well past the point of gentle beginnings. His arms were beginning to tire as he held himself up so he paused to lay himself down on her.

It turns out it was a better idea. He found his weight on her made for a more satisfying thrust, and the skin-on-skin contact was also rewarding. Her nipples, so hard, were brushing against his chest as he pushed into her.

He hoped she was close to an orgasm because he could feel his own building into a powerful crescendo and he wasn't sure if he could hold off. She was breathing loudly now, her hands were gripping his back. In the middle of one of his strong thrusts she stiffened and her grip tightened.

It was too much- he was coming whether she was prepared for it or not. Something deep inside of him clenched and he felt a powerful explosion of ecstasy rush through his loins as he emptied his balls into her.

The orgasm was phenomenal and it hung on long enough for him to lose his breath. Her fingers were caressing his back now, and she was looking at him when he finally came down off his high.

He hoped his O-face didn't look too ridiculous.

"How was it?" Draco asked when he finally found his voice.

"Never in my life," she said in a gasp. "Never have I had sex as good."

Normally he'd be critical of such high praise but he too felt like it was the best performance he had ever given. Drowsiness descended on him and he realized that after the night of dancing and sex he was exhausted. He used the sheet to wipe them both clean and kicked it off the bed. When he took his place on the mattress she laid her head on his chest and he embraced her.

He fell asleep quite certain that he had upheld the honor of the family name.

He hadn't just had sex with her, he had made love to her. She knew it too, which was why when they woke up in each other's arms the first thing she said was,

"I have to break it off with Ron."

He didn't voice his agreement and resisted the (nearly unbearable) temptation to gloat.

"I know things are moving fast," she said, her expression was carefully neutral. "And I'm not trying to lock you into anything, but I was I was wondering if last night was just fun for you or if it was something more?"

"Last night was fun." He replied. "But it wasn't 'just' fun. I've been telling you from the start I want to be with you."

"Just making sure." She said, relief in her voice. She let out a sigh and turned to him sadly. "Breaking up with Ron is going to be really hard. He won't see it coming."

"Of course he won't. Weasley wouldn't see it coming if you wrote it on a bludger and it smashed into his face." Draco replied. "Which I think would be an excellent way to end it, by the way."

"Yes, you're very funny." Hermione said. "You know Ron and I been together since we were kids. I never thought about what would happen if we broke up, but it seems unlikely we'd remain friends. I'm really going to miss him."

"When you get older you move on to better things." Draco said.

"Definitely better sex." She said trying to smile. "You were incredible. I don't know if it's a good or bad idea for you to be teaching Sex Ed."

"Probably bad." Draco said in an offhand way. She laughed and joined her. "Snape has been doing all the teaching; if I had it my way we'd just put on a shadow-puppet show and be done with it."

"It certainly would make the O.W.L's interesting to grade." Hermione remarked.

There was an unmistakable creaking in the hallway, and they both looked in horror as they saw something walk by the bedroom door which had been left slightly ajar.

"Your father!" Hermione gasped.

"No- it has to be one of the dogs." Draco said.

"Severus! Come take a bath with me!" Lucius's voice carried in the hallway. "You're filthy." his father added quietly to himself unaware of the eavesdroppers.

"They're both here!" Hermione said gripping the bedspread tightly.

"Quick- apparate!" Draco said. He got to his feet and shut the bedroom door as quietly as he could.

"I can't show up on the Hogwarts grounds  _nude_!" She whispered a panic. She jumped off the bed and began to pick up her clothes off the floor.

They must have been making quite a bit of noise because the sound of footsteps stopped somewhere down the hall and Draco overheard an alarmed warning muffled through the door.

"No time to dress- under the bed!" Draco said.

He bounded across the room and slipped under the covers. Hermione was tossing her clothes under the bed before lying on her stomach and crawling under it.

His father opened the door in a quick bang and he pointed his wand at Draco. Snape was behind him and also had his wand drawn.

"What are you doing home?" Lucius asked him, lowering his wand.

Draco noisily coughed into his hand.

"I'm sick." He lied. He pulled up the covers high to hide his bare chest.

"Next time tell me you're staying here, Severus and I thought someone was trespassing." Lucius scolded him. "You have no idea how close you came to getting a face-full of my conjunctivitis curse." he said, holstering his wand in his robe.

"Sorry." Draco apologized before breaking into another fit of forced coughs.

"Have you taken anything for that?" His father asked him. "We have a full medicine cabinet."

Draco wasn't focusing on what his father was saying. Snape had spied something Hermione had missed- a pair of lacy underpants. Because Snape was standing behind Lucius, his father wasn't able to see his expression of shock. Draco's heart skipped a beat as Snape's gaze swept the room, no doubt searching for Hermione.

"I'm fine." Draco said eager for them to leave.

"Are you sure? Because-" Lucius said stepping into his room.

"No, don't come any closer!" Draco said. His father frowned. "...I'd hate to get you sick."

"You should really take something." Lucius said, backing up. "Your grandfather thought he had a slight fever and developed a full blown case of Dragon Pox, all because he couldn't be bothered to take care of himself."

"I took something for it." Draco insisted. "I'm not going to die, I just need rest."

"Alright, if you need anything let us know." His father said. Snape raised an eyebrow at him as Lucius shut the door with a snap.

Draco counted to ten before getting out of bed.

"That was close," Hermione whispered. She threw her clothes out on his rug and wiggled out from under his bed. "Thank goodness we didn't get caught."

"We did- Snape saw your underwear, he just didn't say anything." Draco said miserably.

Her eyes widened and she turned pink. She scooped up the offending panties off the floor.

"Do you think he knows they're mine?" Hermione gasped. "Oh what am I saying, of course he doesn't know they're mine."

It was surreal. They were both almost 30 years old and they were fluttering around the room like scared teenagers. Draco held her dress as she quickly put on her bra and underwear and shoes. She wiggled into the dress and turned around, allowing him to connect the clasps for her.

"Got it." Draco said.

She turned around and giggled. He was stark naked and she was overdressed.

"This certainly has been the most memorable date of my life." She confessed.

She kissed him on the lips and gave him a quick hug. "Thank you for everything."

"Anytime." Draco replied. "I mean that. Just let me know when you want to go out with me again."

"I think we better let things cool down between us at school, Harry will probably have questions about where I've been all night." Hermione admitted.

"Maybe we can stage something so it doesn't look like we're so friendly." Malfoy said. "Either way, I'll take care of it."

"You're such a Slytherin." Hermione said with a smile. "I'll see you tomorrow, Professor Malfoy. Take care of that cough."

"I'll be thinking of you all day, Headmistress." Draco told her.

She kissed him one more time before apparating with a loud crack.

* * *

  


Draco regretted not asking more time off even though spending the day in his room had been uneventful. Still, one day with a cough wasn't fooling anybody, least of all Snape.

"Feeling better?" Snape asked him as Draco walked into the Sex Ed classroom.

"Yes, thanks." Draco replied. He thought it best to keep his responses short so Snape couldn't detect his anxiety.

"I have a lesson planned for today's class, but perhaps you would like to teach today?" Snape said, his eyes never blinking. "I believe you've been indulging in... _personal research_."

"I'm not sure what you mean." Draco said.

"Don't lie to me." Snape said icily. "I've held my tongue long enough while you've spun me one pathetic tale after another. Don't insult my intelligence again- you had a woman in your bedroom with you yesterday."

"Yes, you're right, I had sex with my girlfriend." Draco said. "What am I looking at, fifteen years in Azkaban?" He asked sarcastically.

"Who is she?" Snape asked slowly.

"Not this again." Draco sighed. "Don't you think I'm entitled to my privacy?"

"Your privacy ended the moment you brought a stranger into our home." Snape said.

"She's not a stranger, she's my girlfriend." Draco said. "And you might as well give up on finding out who she is because I'm not telling you."

"It's Granger, isn't it?" Snape drawled.

Draco looked at him in awe. Was it possible that Snape  _did_ recognize Hermione's lacy underwear? If so, he wasn't sure if he wanted to know how.

Snape seemed to guess what he was thinking.

"Draco, there are two women here your age and one acts like an escaped mental patient from St. Mungo's." Snape said. "Despite your unseemly fixation flirting with students, I don't think you're brainless enough to start a tryst with one. Granger is the only logical choice. It's her, isn't it?"

Draco hadn't replied fast enough, his silence had confirmed Snape's guess.

"You know your father would never approve." Snape told him darkly.

"Why not?" Draco said, anger gripping him.

"Because she's Potter's lackey, because she's a Muggle-born, because she was indirectly involved with putting him in Azkaban." Snape said quickly. "I could come up with hundreds of reasons why he wouldn't approve of her, just pick one!"

"Well maybe her father has just as many reasons to not approve of me- I have the Dark Mark, I have a father who was thrown in Azkaban and don't forget, I'm the heir to a family line of pure-blood elitists!" Draco snapped. "I could come up with a hundred reasons why no one should approve of a Malfoy- and obviously the skeletons in your closet hasn't stopped my father from marrying  _you_." Draco pointed out.

Snape's eyes glittered dangerously. Draco didn't want Snape to think he disapproved of his father's remarriage, so he reigned back some of the anger in his voice.

"Even if I needed my father's approval- which I don't- he's in no position to be doling out judgments." Draco huffed.

"I'm not saying it's fair," Snape replied in a forced calm. "Only that he's prejudice against her for several reasons."

"Are you going to tell him?" Draco asked.

"No." Snape replied firmly. "It's not my place to inform him of your affairs."

"Then why are we having this conversation?" Draco snapped.

Snape didn't stop Draco as he swept past him. He was fuming as he opened the door to the Sex Ed classroom and walked through it, he made sure to slam the door shut very loudly. He got two steps into the hallway before stopping in his tracks. He let out an angry huff and turned around, opening the Sex Ed classroom door.

Snape was watching him as Draco quickly walked down the aisle. When he got to the desk Snape held up his briefcase up.

"You forgot-"

"Yes- I know!" Draco said irritably. He snatched the briefcase away from Snape without looking at him. He didn't like how Snape wasn't fazed by his showy exit.

"Before you leave, may I have the graded tests?" Snape asked him.

"Fine!" Draco snarled, throwing his briefcase on a desk. He popped it open and roughly handed Snape a stack of papers. "Take them!"

"Very well, you may leave." Snape said, turning away from him and marking something down.

"You're not dismissing me!" Draco scowled. "I'm leaving because I'm angry!"

"Ah." Snape said softly. "All the same, you have my permission to leave."

"I don't need your-" Snape gave him a challenging look from beneath his curtain of hair. Draco seethed. "Nevermind."

The students were starting to arrive, and Draco had to wait an annoyingly long time before the classroom door was free of kids before he could leave. His "grand departure" was ruined.


	8. Challenge

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I can’t tell you how many times I wrote this chapter, erased it, wrote it again, wrote chapters ahead of this one, etc. Sorry it’s been such a long time. I just decided to release it because I need to get this fic moving again.

 

Harry Potter. Harry effing Potter. **  
**

Harry stood before Draco with his arms crossed, brow furrowed, and a challenging glint in his eye. It reminded Draco of the days when they were both Seekers and sizing each other up before a game, only this time Potter was blocking his way to the reception office. **  
**

"We need to talk." Potter said. What Draco heard was, “fuck you” in his tone.

Draco looked down at his rival with a scowl. He knew sooner or later he'd be having this confrontation with Harry. He couldn’t flutter around Hermione so much without it tipping Harry off, and apparently Potter had reached his threshold for standing idly by. Hermione’s disappearance coupled with Draco’s day off was too obvious to go ignored.

Draco had been on his way to deliver the bad news to Hermione that they'd been found-out by Snape when Harry walked out of the reception office with a clenched jaw and the bravado of a contender.

"I don't need to do anything." Draco shot back. "Especially not with you."

Draco reached for the doorknob of the office but Harry's strong arm snapped over the doorway, his eyes flashing.

"Wrong." Harry said darkly.

"What do you think you’re doing?" Draco said with a mocking smile. "Potter, I will pick you up and throw you down these stairs if you don't get out of my way; which would be easy because you’re so tiny." he clarified squeezing his index finger and his thumb together tightly.

"Hermione's my friend, one of my best friends." Harry snapped, refusing to rise to Draco’s bait. "Whatever you're doing to her ends now. You might think you can push everyone around but we have the numbers, so from now on, wherever you go, know you're being watched."

"Yeah? Watch this." Draco said flipping him off. "You and your pathetic gang of has-beens don't scare me."

"You've always been an over-confident, mouthy piece of shit." Harry said coolly. "And it's always come back to bite you in the arse. If you continue with whatever you're doing, you’ll fall hard from your ivory tower, I promise."

"You think I'm scared if you're watching me?” Draco said with a smile. “Take some notes and see how a man, a Malfoy, does things. You can learn a thing or two- starting with those clothes. You look like a disgraced, Muggle coffee shop manager.

Draco flicked the collar of Harry's plaid shirt and saw Potter's jaw clench.

"You might have the numbers, but I have the might.” Draco went on. “And one lesson you and your gaggle of pathetics need to be taught is 'a Malfoy is nothing to be trifled with'. Now get out of my way.”

Harry slowly dropped his arm, allowing Draco to brush past him. Harry never blinked, never took his eyes off Draco as he walked into the reception office.

"Hullo!" Luna greeted Draco. "Come to see the Headmistress?"

"Yes." Draco said crossing the room and reaching for the doorknob.

Luna let out a 'nooooo!' which startled Draco as she threw herself in front of the door, blocking his path.

"Merlin's beard!" Draco said backing up, his heart thumping hard against his chest. "What are you doing? You almost ran into me!" One of Draco’s hands rubbed down his robes; he imagined her body-slamming him and wrinkling his carefully ironed outfit.

"I'm afraid the Headmistress is currently preoccupied." Luna said in an officious tone.

“Yeah, I gathered that.” Draco huffed. “When will she be done?”

"Not sure...but I think it’ll be a while.” Luna said.  “Can I get you a tea? Or a 'special tea'?"

Draco had always had a short fuse for waiting and he had no intentions of standing there all morning like a common parent.

"Special tea, please." He said in a smooth drawl.

Luna smiled and skipped to her trashcan. While she was bent over Draco opened the door to Hermione's office.

"Noooooo-!" Luna yelled, dropping a bottle of whiskey in her trash. "Drat." she cursed as Draco slipped through the door. 

* * *

 

When Draco was very young, and when Draco's father was away on business, Narcissa Malfoy would make her son swear a secret.

"Promise me you will never tell your father where we are going and what we are doing." she said, her tone very serious.

The two of them would begin their journey to 'the secret place' like this every week. Draco was six years-old and eager to please his mother, and he would promise her his silence- he understood the full weight of the consequences if his mother was caught.

Narcissa would check their house for Lucius even if he had been gone for half the day before departing with Draco. Sometimes she would even call out, "Lucius, dear?" and wait for a response before apparating.

And so, hand-in-hand with his mother, Draco popped into a little alley outside a building in London.

"It's about to start." Narcissa said with her hand still clasped on Draco's. He thought he was too old for her to lead around by the hand but she insisted on this while in 'muggle territory'.

Draco never found out exactly where they went every week but it seemed to be some sort of muggle waiting room. The people who sat in the room always changed and they didn't look very happy to be there but kept mostly silent, which Draco liked.

Plus, there were lots of toys to play with.

Draco ran to the toy-bin and began digging out the baby toys to throw aside. All the good toys for older boys were usually on the bottom. Guiltily he nabbed all the cars and piled them beside him. He tried to ignore the thought that his father would be furious if he knew his son was playing with muggle toys.

"Good afternoon, Nancy." Greeted Thelma to his mother using her fake name. Thelma sat at a desk behind a little divider but always joined them in the waiting room when Narcissa showed up.

Normally Narcissa wouldn't have traded two words with Thelma, even if somehow the muggle-woman miraculously blossomed into a witch. She wasn't especially attractive or rich, or even very interesting. Draco thought she was very plain compared to his mother’s friends, but here in their secret place Narcissa blossomed with affection for the middle-aged woman.

"Do you think Angelo is going to wake up from that coma and declare his love to Janice?" Thelma gushed to her established friend.

"Oh I sincerely hope not." His mother drawled with a scoff. "She doesn't deserve him. That hussy would run off with the first person who winked at her. Remember what a trainwreck Garrett was? And she thought it was true love!" Thelma and her shared a knowing smile.

"Well, he was the evil twin of her dead boyfriend. You can't blame a girl for having feelings for a man who looks just like your murdered first love." Thelma sighed.

"But she's such an amatuer. Always check for a twin, bloodlines are important!" His mother insisted.

The telly-vision was propped up in a corner as the women chatted and gasped. Draco heard what his mother was watching was something called a 'soap opera', but he didn't quite understand it. It had nothing to do with soap and it certainly wasn't an opera- (except for the episode where Janice fell in love with a serial killer who seduced his victims with his voice. Draco agreed with his mother, Janice was too undeserving of decent men and frustratingly naïve.)

And so every Wednesday Draco was brought to this waiting room until the show ended and they never went to the room again. His mother did tell him Thelma had decided to retire to Hawaii after discovering a wealthy benefactor left a hefty sum of money to her. (Whether Narcissa did this out of kindness or to keep Lucius from discovering Thelma, Draco never asked.)

And all the memories of the soap opera, of desperate Janice who always seemed so out-of-her-league with the men she didn't deserve (or was trying to kill her) came rushing back as Draco stepped into Hermione's office to find Ron Weasley standing there in crippling, emotional agony.

Draco could almost hear the soundtrack to the soap's music playing in the background.

"You can't argue me out of my decision." Hermione said heavily, looking sad but firm in her delivery of the news.

"But why?" Ron choked. "What happened to us, what changed? Why can’t you give me answers?"

“I’m not going to argue specifics with you, Ron. This wasn’t a knee-jerk reaction to any one thing, I’ve just recognized that we’ve grown apart and I’m moving on.” Hermione said looking very uncomfortable.

“You’re still not saying anything.” Ron snapped. “You’re still not telling me why you’re breaking up with me!”

Draco cleared his throat loudly. Hermione had been so absorbed in her fight with Ron that she hadn’t noticed Draco’s arrival. She squirmed guiltily before giving Ron a worried look, who was equal parts shocked and furious that Draco had walked-in on them.

"What's he doing here?!" Ron snarled.

 _"I AM....her lover!"_ Draco thought, but felt it would be much too heavy to reenact. That sort of behavior got Angelo killed in episode nine, after all.

"I work here. Me being here isn't unusual, what are you doing here?" Draco replied. "Begging for a job?"

Draco didn’t expect Ron to admit that Hermione was breaking up with him; He steadied himself for a fist-fight as the now furious ex-boyfriend marched toward him with purpose.

"I know you have something to do with this." Ron accused Draco. He was shaking but hadn’t thrown a punch. He turned to Hermione, still furious, and spat out, "We'll talk later!"

“There’s nothing else to say, Ron-” Hermione stated as she shrank slightly under his fury.

“We’ll talk later!” Ron repeated again. He shoulder-shoved Draco out of the way before opening up the door and slamming it closed behind him.

"...Good morning Draco, so nice of you to stop by my office after I've made it clear to my secretary under no conditions, other than Voldemort coming back and swearing the murder of us all, should anyone enter." Hermione said in her long greeting.

"Morning love." Draco replied in a playful purr.

All the tension in the room melted as Draco shot her an innocent smile. She shook her head but he saw her trying to stifle a smile of her own.

"I've just dumped Ron." Hermione explained. "I think it's a good idea if we don't let our relationship become public knowledge for a while. You've witnessed his 30th 'but why', and I get the impression he's not going to stop asking."

"Yeah...there’s something you should know about our relationship being known." Draco said sheepishly. Hermione's eyes widened. "Professor Snape found out."

"How?" Hermione gasped.

"He recognized your underwear." Draco said gravely.

Her expression switched from horrified to confused and back to horrified again. Draco grinned.

"Sorry, it was a bad joke." He laughed.

"That's not funny." Hermione said trying to hide another smile. "You really scared me for a  moment."

He knew he shouldn't tease her, but he was in such a great mood he couldn't help himself. After all of Harry's posturing and scare-tactics, Potter was going to have to comfort his best mate who was ceremoniously dumped, while he, Draco, got the girl. Life had never been sweeter.

"Snape did figure it out though." Draco told her.

"Surely you didn't tell him?" Hermione asked. She sank into her seat and bit her bottom lip.

"No." Draco replied. "He ferreted it out of me."

At the word ‘ferreted’ Hermione hid a smile behind a 'concerned' hand.

"I saw that." Draco said. "You can smile around me, you know. I like it."

"It's not proper. I've just dumped my long-term boyfriend." Hermione insisted. "It doesn't feel, well, _fair_ knowing he's so miserable while I get to be happy."

"Boo-hoo, Weasley will get over it." Draco said crossing the room and sitting on the chair. "I'm sure it's not the first huge disappointment he's suffered in life and I doubt it'll be his last."

"Even so, I feel guilty, so let's not rub it in." Hermione replied. She rubbed her face with one hand and let out deep sigh. “Alright, how bad is it that Snape and possibly your father know about us? They wouldn't parade us in front of Harry to cause trouble, would they?"

"Um..." Draco started. He weighed how much of his father's prejudice he should admit to his new girlfriend. "They're both really old-school Slytherins, so I don't think they'd rush to make us public.”

“What does that mean?” Hermione asked him. “That they’d be embarrassed of us being together?”

“Not embarrassed.” Draco assured her. “But you can't ignore generations of bad Slytherin-Gryffindor relations. Don’t forget that they were students here, so the ‘rivalry thing’ is still alive- but don't worry, Snape is more forgiving of our atypical union."

"Do you hear yourself? You just told me Snape is the sympathetic one." Hermione replied. "That doesn't calm me down, quite the opposite really."

"I said don’t worry. I'll handle it just like I've handled everything that's come our way." Draco promised.

“Well...you know them better than I do.” Hermione said with a pause. “How is the potion coming along?”

“Good.” Draco said, his tone high with fake confidence.

She raised her eyebrows.

"I just have to get it translated and to Snape." Draco fessed-up. "You've been on my mind lately, sorry I've been dragging my feet. I'll get things moving, Headmistress."

"Please do, the enchanted group is starting to get restless again, and I think they'll try to go into the Forbidden Forest soon." Hermione said. Her expression softened towards him. "Don't feel too bad, I know we've both been ...busy."

She looked away from him and fiddled with a button on her blouse.

"Maybe we can get busy later?" Draco asked.

"On the day I've dumped my boyfriend?" Hermione asked. Draco wiggled his eyebrows. "No. Despite your best efforts I do have some dignity.”

“I’ll wear down your moral integrity one day.” Draco teased her.

“I fully support your efforts after you’ve gotten the potion brewed.” Hermione replied.

"You promise?" Draco replied with a wink.

Hermione smiled and returned his wink.

* * *

 Translating a potion manuscript isn’t a task as easy as it sounds.

Draco knew a lot about charms, and normally this would be a very simple process if the script was written in Latin-based language. Being from a wealthy, noble house meant that he had to learn Latin for practical reasons, (mostly to read his own family history) and he could guess more or less if a translation from a Latin-language to English was going smoothly or not- he knew nothing of Japanese. Draco guessed from the faded parchment that it was much older than present-day and therefore, if he used a modern translation spell, the translation would be prone to mistakes.

Draco wasn’t a fool, an exact translation was very important. When it came to potions everything needed to be very precise- you don’t mess around or take shortcuts in brewing or you could find yourself three fingers short of a hand- or worse, three fingers more. That afternoon Draco arranged payment for a linguist from his fireplace, careful to hold up the scroll for inspection without it being too close to the fire.

“Yes, I’m certain I can get the scroll translated.” The woman promised him.

“Thank you, Mrs. Sugiyama.” Draco said to her. “I’ll be sending it to you today.”

He didn’t know much about Japanese culture but he did an awkward sort of bow. He was already hunched over looking at the fireplace and managed to tip a little further. The linguist had a smile in the corner of her mouth as she nodded back to him before the fire went out.

“Teachers meeting in a few minutes.” His mirror reminded him.

“Thanks.” Draco replied. He rushed into his private bathroom to brush his teeth. “Mirror, do you have a name?” he knew the answer would be ‘no’, but asked anyway.

“Not in a sense.” His mirror replied. “I was manufactured by the Waldemar company.”

“I’m not calling you Waldemar.” Draco told her after spitting out the toothpaste. “Do you have a preference?”

“Well…” his mirror said in a wispy way. “I’ve always been partial to ‘Ida’.”

“I like it.” Draco said. “It suits you very well.”

“So nice of you to say so, deary.” Ida the Mirror replied. “You better get going or you’ll be late.”

And that was the beginning of Ida, who would prove to be a tremendously valuable mirror to the Malfoy’s and not just because she kept Draco’s appearance and schedule so proper.

 

* * *

In the future Draco promised himself he would come as early as possible to staff meetings. There was a single seat left for him to take next to Snape, but even though the meeting hadn't started everyone stared at him as he entered the room. As much as he enjoyed the attention of others it made him feel like Harry was delivering on his threat of “constant supervision”, and if Harry was succeeding in recruiting everyone for this, it meant that Potter was more popular and had more influence in Draco’s workplace- and Draco couldn’t have that.

 _“I rule this school.”_ Draco thought as he strolled toward his chair. A sarcastic smile was growing on his lips as Harry watched him closely.

Harry didn’t blink, and Draco returned his icy stare by refusing to blink as well. This created an uncomfortable effect as Draco’s eyes watered by the time he got into his seat.

"This will be a short meeting." Hermione promised them all.

It was clear to Draco that no one believed her. People shifted in their seats and adapted a more casual, comfortable posture while she began to delve into some of the usual administration topics. Within moments everyone became glassy-eyed.

Draco’s mind wandered in and out of daydreams, most of them involving the beautiful woman he had just won out of Weasley’s arms. Occasionally he’d catch Harry’s eye and they’d shoot each other dirty looks.

“And so, I think it’s be best…. you two, stop.” Hermione said sternly. "That's very distracting."

In the midst of the meeting, somehow Harry and Draco had gotten caught-up in a full-blown scowl session at each other.

“Sorry.” Harry replied.

Draco didn’t apologize, but he did give Harry a mocking, triumphant smile.

“ _That’s one point to me, Potter.”_ Draco thought as Harry seethed at him. He was sure Potter couldn't read minds, but Harry seemed to get the gist as his nostrils flared.

"Really you two." Hermione said with a clear warning in her voice. "If you have something to say to each other speak-up or stop glaring at each other."

"Headmistress, I have something to say." Snape said in a bored tone. "There's a long-standing issue that has been brought up before but has been left unresolved for quite some time now." Snape said addressing the room.

"Yes, of course." Hermione said. She was looking calm as Snape held the attention of the room.

"I mentioned months ago that students have been expressing their infatuations with certain teachers and there was not a proper response of discouragement." Snape said, sneering at Harry.

Harry didn’t react, but he was noticeably stiffer in his seat as Snape allowed the statement to linger.

"I believe this problem has been growing. Just this morning I was informed a very influential student has become unnaturally obsessed with...well, let's keep the teacher anonymous." Snape said shifting his gaze from Harry, to Hermione, and settling on catching Draco's eye.

Hermione seemed to understand the implication that she was the 'influential student', despite her calm exterior Draco saw her face flushed a light pink as she looked down at her list of topics determinately.

"Your concerns have been noted." Hermione said steadily.

"I fear if this situation isn't discouraged soon you may be in danger of a lawsuit, or worse." Snape said.

“I’ll look into it, Professor.” Hermione replied stiffly.

“I don’t doubt that you will…” Snape replied before breaking a nasty smile.

Draco also flushed and he couldn’t help noticing a very awkward silence settled around the table. He made the unwise choice of looking at Harry, who was back to challenging him to a ‘don’t blink’ game as his gaze challenged Draco’s.

"Next on the agenda..." Hermione spoke, sounding overly-official.

Snape was drinking in her awkwardness as he watched her squirm. Draco had the urge to kick him hard under the table but resisted; he had plans to ask Snape to help him with the potion after the meeting and he couldn’t risk spoiling the man’s sick enjoyment of tormenting his girlfriend.

"Headmistress, I'm loathe to interrupt you," Snape drawled.  "But-"

But no one got to find out what Snape had to say, because the meeting room door burst open with a bang. McGonagall was first on her feet with her wand out, followed by Harry. Draco suppressed a bubble of anxiety at the sudden interruption.

"Started without me." Filch said nervously. His face was flushed and he was wearing a moldy wizarding dress robe for some reason. Mrs. Norris was tucked under his arm and in danger of drowning in the ruffles.

It was a scene so ridiculous that Hermione didn't interrupt him as he grabbed a folding chair from the corner and propped it between Snape and Draco.

"Mr. Filch," McGonagall said holstering her wand. "this is a meeting for teachers only."

"I'm sick of being out of the loop, I work just as hard as the rest of ya- you think the only problems that happen in this school is teaching-related?" Filch snapped.

"If you have a complaint you can schedule it with the Headmistress." McGonagall chided him.

"If this is a staff meeting I'm entitled to be here, I'm staff!" Filch scowled.

Mrs. Norris' clawed paw shot through one of Filch's ruffles and caught Draco's sleeve around the forearm. She pulled at his robe causing a linear rip in his garment. Anger gripped him, one of his favorite robes was getting mangled by a vexed janitors pet.

“This bloody cat-” Draco scowled. He grabbed Mrs. Norris' paw and unhooked her claws from his sleeve. “How is it even alive? It’s got to be 900 years old in cat-years!”

Filch's eyes was shifting rapidly around the room, and he suddenly didn't look so eager to be there.

"Yes Filch," Snape said folding his hands on the table. "It's all very remarkable. How does a cat live that long without assistance?"

"Eh?" Filch said. He held Mrs. Norris to his chest possessively.

"Headmistress, I would like to draw attention to another issue." Snape said.

"What is it?" Hermione asked; she had lost control of her own staff meeting and was looking flustered.

"Every six months or so, when I do my inventory, I seem to have a shortage of powerful restoration potions that I haven't yet delivered to Madam Pomfrey." Snape said carefully. "It's puzzling because I keep the storage cabinet locked where they are kept. The only way to open it is if someone had a key."

Filch was shifting uncomfortably and Draco saw him wipe his face with his ruffled sleeve. Draco was glad Snape had shifted his bullying from Hermione to Filch, but he couldn't help but feel slightly sorry for the man as he shrank in his seat.

"Perhaps our newest arrival can weigh in with some theories?" Snape said, turning his attention to Filch. “Who would have keys to locked drawers at Hogwarts?”

"Er-" Filch started.

McGonagall stood up from her chair and whispered something in Hermione's ear.

"Mr. Filch, if you have any complaints, please contact me and don't interrupt my staff meetings." Hermione said.

"Sorry Headmistress." Filch replied. "I'll be on my way now. You're right, I shouldn't be imposing on teacher-business."

Draco had never seen a person clear a room that quickly. Filch didn't even wait for Hermione's dismissal as he ran out the door. Snape was looking especially smug.

"Is there....is there anything else?" Hermione stuttered. She was avoiding looking at Snape, possibly because she couldn't handle another of his hidden accusations. She hadn't paused long enough for anyone to speak up before clapping her hands together. "Meeting adjourned."

 

* * *

 

Draco made sure Harry saw him leave the meeting room without a second-glance to Hermione. Instead of returning to his classroom or the staff room, Draco slipped into the men's toilets and waited a few minutes before doubling-back and returning to the meeting room.

All the teachers seemed to have returned to their business, but thankfully Hermione was still there. She was mumbling to herself as she moved Filch's folding chair back to the corner.

Draco knocked on the door causing her to drop it. It clattered on the floor as she turned around with a sigh of relief.

"God- you scared me, I thought you were Filch." Hermione said. She picked up the folding chair and placed it against the wall.

“No, it’s just me, gorgeous.” Draco said.

“I appreciate you trying to cheer me up.” Hermione sighed. “On a scale of one-to-ten, how bad was the meeting? Don’t try to spare my feelings.”

"You’re using the wrong scale."  Draco told her. "On a scale of "Voldemort" to "waking up with a permanent tattoo of a penis on your forehead", it sits around "Voldemort giving you a penis for the Dark Mark"."

"But staff meetings are absolutely necessary." Hermione said dropping into a chair. "What's not necessary is Professor Snape's thinly veiled threats. He toyed with me."

"He does that." Draco said shrugging. "It's his thing."

"Well ‘his thing’ is giving me a heart attack." Hermione cut in. "You said he would keep this quiet, why is he dangling it above our heads?"

"Surely you've noticed he's always been kind of a git?" Draco was reluctant to admit.

A small gasp of shock escaped her lips, probably from hearing Draco speak out against Snape, but she recovered by keeping her face neutral.

"Yes- but you said not to worry." Hermione reminded him. "That he would be sympathetic."

"He didn't say anything that anyone would pick up on." Draco said. "He's just entertaining himself the only way he knows how. He likes to cause distress, but he's not going to tell anybody."

"You know the entire time he was talking all I could think about was that he saw my underwear." Hermione sighed.

“The entire time you were talking, all I could think about was you without your underwear.” Draco said with a grin.

“Ha ha.” Hermione said sarcastically. “Nothing you say is going to make me forget that my former professor knows about my sex life- and apparently he’s thinking up a thousand ways to remind me of that.”

Draco took the opportunity to rub her shoulders.

“Think of this as our first major challenge as a couple.” Draco said. “If we can get through your staff meetings, we can get through anything.”

"Staff meetings are not that bad." Hermione said defensively. "They're usually much less eventful."

"I'll have to take your word for it." Draco said.

"...I just wish it wasn’t so obvious that I'm losing my grip on this school." Hermione said as she leaned into Draco's massage. "My staff doesn't respect me, Snape and your father doesn’t respect me, and not even the janitor takes me seriously. Not even the janitor’s cat."

"That cat is an unholy, dark creature." Draco told her.

"Ugh, if only you could stay here and rub my shoulders forever." Hermione groaned.

"I wish I could, Headmistress, but that's not what you pay me for." Draco said. He bent over and kissed her cheek, and when she turned to face him he took the opportunity to kiss her lips. "I've got it all under control." he whispered.

 

* * *

Okay, so maybe not _all_ under control.

It turned out Snape wasn't being quite so generous with his time for Draco as he used to be. Draco wasn't sure if it had to do with Snape's busy schedule or the man's feelings for Hermione, but Snape insisted that Draco could only talk to him if he actually scheduled a meeting to.

After a few false starts in conversation that Snape refused to be a part of, Draco finally booked a half-hour of Snape's time after lunch hour.

Snape's office was dark, gloomy and awful, which Draco was certain the Potions Master had made look that way on purpose, if only to intimidate students. Draco didn't like admitting that his former Head of House still could get under his skin and make him feel like a kid. That was never more true as Snape sat behind his desk, staring at Draco as he took a seat across from him.

“Yes?” Snape said.

“The potion manuscript is being translated.” Draco told him. “It’ll be ready shortly.”

Snape continued to watch him from behind his desk, only this time with the beginning of a frown gracing his features.

“You said you would help me brew it.” Draco urged him.

“What is the potion being used for?” Snape asked.

“I told you.”

“You told me it was for a girl who I now know is Granger.” Snape said softly. “You still need to impress a girl that you're seeing carnally?"

"You do have to keep on impressing them if you want them to stick around." Draco said, testing Snape's mood.

Joking with Snape was always a 50/50 shot, sometimes the joke caused the man to crack a smile and sometimes he responded by treating you like you'd just offered him a private reading of _My Life Among the Sugar Faeries_ with Gilderoy Lockhart.

Snape seemed to be leaning towards the Lockhart-theory as his lip curled.

"Why does Granger need this potion?" Snape asked with all patience gone from his voice.

“I can’t tell you.” Draco said _. You wouldn’t believe me._

“Then I can hardly in good conscience brew it for you.” Snape replied. Draco bit back a whine that he knew wouldn't land well with Snape. He would need to use all his diplomacy to change the Potion Master's mind.

Or would he? As he drew a large breath to plead his case, the office door wrenched opened and Draco knew at once the cavalry had arrived. No one would be brave enough to burst into Snape's office without an invitation or without knocking except his father. If there was one person who would fight on a Malfoy's behalf it was another Malfoy. Draco cheered internally at his good fortune as Lucius stepped into the office with a light-halo around him.

"There you are." Lucius accused Snape as if he was hiding. He closed the door behind him and the light-halo was gone. "Does anyone else find this school distastefully huge? The administration should make some sort of map that shows where people are instead of me guessing your whereabouts." he spat. "Ooo Severus, write that down, it’s ingenious. Hello Draco." He added as an afterthought.

"Hi father." Draco replied with a smile.

"You could ask the paintings to seek me out." Snape suggested coldly. He didn't seem at all pleased with Lucius' arrival.

"They're not speaking to me- Granger has ordered them to not help me move about until I’ve ‘signed in’ to the office." Lucius said with a sigh.

“Why don’t you sign in?” Draco asked him.

"Draco, I have more pride than that.” Lucius laughed. Draco wasn’t sure what he meant exactly, but he supposed defying the Headmistress filled his father’s days with self-fulfilling rebellion.

“It’s so silly because every time I walk by a painting they freeze in their frames like I'm some ignorant Muggle that doesn't know they move. Even Tristan of Greenwood goes into in mid-dance-step and shakes as he balances on one leg! I know he's a magical portrait because I donated him! Of course, that may be the reason he refuses to acknowledge me- but his dancing is ghastly and not the quirky type of ‘ghastly’ that would go well with the furniture in the study..."

"Lucius, as fascinating as I find this conversation I must stop you. I told you I'd be too busy for your company during school hours today." Snape reminded him.

Draco gathered from his unenthusiastic tone that Snape didn't find the conversation fascinating at all, although it did make Draco feel better knowing that Snape was actually busy and not proactively ignoring him out of spite.

"Nonsense." Lucius said dismissively to Snape. "I just wanted to stop by and see you for a few minutes. I did plan a much lengthier visit, but as you may gather I spent most of it running up and down staircases trying to find you- well, at least it's good for my heart." he added strolling around the office. "Why are you meeting with Draco and not me?" He asked. Draco noted a hint of jealousy in his tone.

"I asked Professor Snape to help me brew a difficult potion, but he won’t." Draco pouted.

"Why not?" Lucius asked as he gave Snape a disapproving frown.

Snape looked furious as Draco shrugged forlornly.

"Severus, stop being difficult and help Draco brew the potion, you're the resident Potion's Master for Merlin’s sake." Lucius ordered. "Who else is Draco supposed to ask? Potter?"

Snape shot Draco a very nasty glare as Lucius fluttered around the room. Draco knew if there was any way to put Snape into a horrid mood it was to mention Harry Potter.

"Lucius, darling, do you recall that conversation we had on boundaries... and how I have them?" Snape said darkly. "You are violating several. First by ignoring my wishes by being here, then by invading my office and lastly, demanding I do something without seeking my input."

"Ugh, not  this 'boundaries' conversation again...." Lucius mumbled. He tapped his cane lightly against a glass jar holding something with sucking pods all over it.

"You promised me you'd do better." Snape reminded him in a soft, dangerous voice.

Lucius snapped his tongue against his teeth and let out a long-suffering sigh. _"Fine."_ He drawled. He didn't seem to be concerned that he was making Snape angry. Draco gripped his chair slightly as his father pouted. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry that I love you so much and that I wish to spend time with you- more than you wish to spend time around me, apparently."

"And remember the conversation we had on guilt-tripping-"

"Yes, _I understand_ , Severus!" Lucius interrupted dropping his pout. He had finally surmised it wasn't going to get him much sympathy.

"I'll see you in the evening." Snape told him bluntly. "I love you. Goodbye."

"You're dismissing me?" Lucius huffed.

"Yes." Snape replied in a low baritone.

"You shouldn't dismiss me by telling me you love me, it sends all sorts of mixed signals." Lucius tutted him. "You don't want me to think every time you tell me you love me that you're trying to get rid of me, do you?"

Snape looked on the verge of saying something nasty but instead let out a quiet, angry hiss.

"Please leave." Snape replied as he tried to keep his voice neutral.

Lucius walked up to Snape with his head high, like a king, and delivered a quick kiss to Snape’s lips.

"Have a good day." Lucius said stiffly.

"You too." Snape replied evenly. He was staring ahead at Draco as if challenging him to comment.

"I'll try, darling." Lucius sighed sadly.

"Bye dad." Draco said. His father's interference hadn't worked in his favor like he'd hoped.

Lucius turned to leave but spun quickly on his heel as he got to the doorway. He raised an elegant eyebrow at Snape.

"You are going to make that potion for Draco, aren't you?" Lucius asked him.

"No." Snape said firmly. This time he didn't bother hiding his frustration. "Goodbye."

"Why not? Tell me why you're bullying my son." Lucius demanded. "Is it because we’re having a little tiff over your ‘boundaries’? Severus, it's not fair to take your frustrations out on him on my account."

Snape's mouth dropped in agitated disbelief.

"Lucius, leave!" Snape told him.

"How can I when I now know there's an issue between you and my son?" Lucius said.

"Are you really so desperate for my attention you'll start an argument to be here?" Snape snapped angrily.

"If you wish I can stop by the Headmistress's office and request a meeting for this conversation? We all know how much she'd love that." Lucius threatened.

"You really can't stop yourself, can you?" Snape hissed with a malicious glint in his eyes. "Very well, Mr. Malfoy, please take a seat." He said smoothly.

"Um, I’ve got things to do, I can come back later." Draco said, rising from his chair.

“Sit. Down.” Snape snarled at Draco.

Draco lowered his ass back into the chair like a sinking ship, and feeling just as horrified as if Snape had fired shots at him. Lucius sat down at the chair next to Draco, his eyes were narrowed slightly as Snape crossed his hands and placed them on his desk. Lucius and Snape scowled at each other as Draco looked between them, holding his breath.

"Draco has asked me to brew a potion for him but he refuses to tell me what it's for." Snape informed Lucius coolly. “I find his reluctance to share such simple information alarming.”

"Then he’s probably using it for something private and embarrassing... you know how boys are." Lucius sniffed.

“I’m 29, Father.” Draco said, annoyed.

“You’re not using the potion for anything dangerous, are you Draco?" Lucius asked him.

"I really don’t want to get dragged into this." Draco pleaded.

"See?" Lucius smiled at Snape. "There's no reason to not help him, especially since your work keeps you away from me so often- it's insulting that you'd work yourself to excess but refuse to do your job for Draco."

"I am not employed at this school to be a potion's master at anybody's whimsy, Mr. Malfoy." Snape said. "I'm contracted by the school for school matters. Your son came to me to place a request. Furthermore, I'm not 'bullying him', I simply won't be involved with making a potion without being informed what it will be used for- to do so would be foolish."

“And what are your suspicions based on?” Lucius asked angrily. “You don’t trust Draco? I recall you being the one who is constantly harping on giving him his space, to stop meddling in his affairs, to not search his belongings-"

"You're going through my things!?" Draco gasped as he whipped himself towards his dad.

"Quiet Draco, I'm trying to communicate with Professor Snape and it's difficult with you interrupting me." Lucius said without looking at him. He returned his attention to Snape with a fraudulent smile. "And now you interrogate him like a criminal instead of helping him with something that comes naturally to you. Do you not see how hypocritical you are?”

“Do you not understand that I carry an element of responsibility if I agree to make him this potion!” Snape snarled. Draco could see the emotion building up between the both of them as they scowled at each other. “And just because I excel in potion-making doesn’t mean it’s effortless for me!”

“How horrible for you that you’ve been put into a position where a family member is asking for your assistance and it’s not ‘effortless’.” Lucius snapped. Draco’s eyes widened as Snape’s face twisted in rage.

“I am NOT withholding my assistance because it’s DIFFICULT!” Snape boomed.

“No, you’re withholding your assistance because you think Draco is going to do something wrong.” Lucius sneered. Draco thought he looked smug that he had gotten Snape to lose his temper.

“I never said I thought he's doing something wrong-”

“Then why are you giving him such a hard time?” Lucius interrupted.

“I already told you,” Snape said with intense frustration, “if you actually listened to people when they speak, you’d recall my reasons. But as usual you only hear what you want to hear.”

“Where do you get this idea that I don't listen? When have I ever 'heard what I want to hear'?” Lucius laughed without mirth.

“You do it all the time!” Snape accused. “You did it mere seconds ago when you asked Draco if he was going to do something dangerous with the potion! You carried on the conversation as if he answered you in the way you wanted him to.”

“Draco, did I ignore you?” Lucius asked. There was an extremely tense pause.

"I have no opinion.” Draco informed them as he squirmed in his chair. He was too afraid to get dragged into their fight and too scared to get up and leave. Snape shot him a sour look for not taking a side.

“I hate arguing with you, Severus. Just make the potion and be done with it.” Lucius huffed.

“Or we can stop arguing and I _won’t_ make the potion.” Snape replied.

“Right, and everyone can stew in their misery- which would make you so happy, wouldn’t it?” Lucius snapped. “You adore making these stupid little matters so difficult!”

“They’re not stupid or little!” Snape said. “Stop insisting that my feelings are invalid compared to everyone else's!"

"Your suspicious nature is running away with you- Draco would never hurt you and he'd never put you in a position that would hurt your reputation; I'm not dismissing your feelings, but I am dismissing your suspicions." Lucius insisted. He turned to Draco with intense seriousness. "This potion is not going to harm anyone, is it?"

Draco shook his head, though it felt like the bottom of his stomach had twisted into knots. He wasn't sure if he was telling the truth or not.

"We are family, Severus." Lucius said gently, turning towards Snape. "Sometimes you have to give family a pass when you wouldn't for outsiders."

Snape took a few breaths, his gaze shifting from Lucius and back to Draco.

"I better not regret this." Snape said pointing at Draco with a scowl and a thin finger.

Draco couldn't believe it, but somehow his father had swayed Snape.

"Oh darling, this is so decent of you-"  Lucius started.

"And you, don't patronize me." Snape seethed shifting his finger at Lucius. "Part of me is doing this because I know you'll be absolutely insufferable unless I give in."

Lucius smiled roguishly under Snape’s unwavering glare.

"Now both of you, get out of my sight!" Snape snarled.

“Steady on, my love.” Lucius said getting out of his chair. "We're leaving."

Draco could feel Snape’s heated gaze all the way out of his office. Once the door was closed behind him, Draco let out the breath he was holding.

"Thank you so much, Father." Draco said. "I couldn't have done it without you."

"Yes, I really stuck my neck out for you.” Lucius said sternly. His sudden mood-swing caused Draco to be on his guard again. “Whatever you're doing it better not come up every time I make Severus upset, he’s obsessive when it comes to grudges.”

"I thought you trusted me?" Draco said while his gratefulness melted. "Or maybe you don't, which is why you're going through my personal things."

"Now I know what you're thinking, it's a violation of a personal boundary. As you've witnessed I have been working on that." Lucius said defensively.

"So I have your word you're going to stop snooping into my business?" Draco asked him.

"Yes, yes- I feel bad about it and it might have weighed into me being an advocate on your behalf today." Lucius said, fiddling with the snakehead of his cane. "Let's choose not to bring this up again, I think it's best if we moved on."

 

* * *

 

Draco checked his watch; he had been running his day a little too carelessly and had left himself only 20 minutes of prep time before his next Charms class. He rehearsed his lesson in his head as he mumbled to himself the day's incantation.

"Hey Junior." Sirius said slinking out of the hallway with Harry next to him.

Draco halted as Sirius and Harry slide out from behind the bend of the hallway. They didn't have their wands out, but there was a definite threatening tone as they watched him closely.

“What are you making the potion for?” Harry asked him.

Draco wasn’t prepared for the question, his mouth opened in shock. Potter must have either been following him or overheard him speaking about the potion.

“How do you know about that?” Draco asked.

“We have our ways.” Sirius said airily.

"You've been following me with that stupid invisibility cloak, haven't you?” Draco accused Harry.

Sirius' expression darkened as he leaned over into Harry's ear and whispered something.

“Yeah, unfortunately...” Harry replied with a sigh.

“How? When?” Sirius asked.

“Well...in third year I used it for a prank that didn’t go as planned.” Harry said.

“A prank?" Sirius repeated. His face lit up with interest.

“You’ll like this story,” Harry said with a grin.  “I had to sneak off to Hogsmeade because I couldn’t get my permission form signed and it had snowed- oh bollocks.”

“What?” Sirius asked with a frown.

“Malfoy’s gone.” Harry said.

During their engrossing conversation Draco had indeed taken the opportunity to sneak away.

“Damn it.” Sirius cursed. He checked down the hallways before giving Harry a shrug. “We really need to stop getting so distracted.”

“I can’t help it, I missed talking to you and having you around.” Harry admitted.

“Thanks Harry, I really enjoy talking to you too.” Sirius said with a grin. His smile dropped. “But seriously, we can’t allow ourselves to get sucked into these entertaining narratives, especially when confronting Malfoy.”

“What’s this about, Potter?”

Draco and Snape stood side-by-side, their wand-hands lingering near their cloak-pockets as they faced Sirius and Harry at the ready.

“Merlin’s beard, that little cretin called for backup!” Sirius seethed at Harry.

"The Headmistress will be most displeased to hear you've blocked Professor Malfoy from getting to his classroom." Snape told the Gryffindors with an air of triumph. "And Potter...!"

Harry flinched but didn't back down from Snape's look of utter loathing.

"I will be having a conversation with the Headmistress about where your priorities lay; it seems you'd rather faff-about with your buffoon of a godfather then perform your responsibilities as the Defense and Dark Arts professor." Snape threatened.

"I am doing my performing my responsibilities to this school." Harry replied coldly.

They were interrupted as Lupin and Hermione turned the corner. They were deep in conversation when their words died off as they stood in the middle of the Slytherin-Gryffindor face-off.

“Ah-ha! Moony!” Sirius barked. He grabbed Remus by the elbow and dragged him closer between Harry and himself. "Three-to-two!"

"Typical Gryffindor odds." Snape snarled.

“Are we playing some sort of game?” Remus asked.

“Dibs- Hermione is also on our side.” Sirius called, grabbing her elbow as well and dragging her over.

"No, you can't just grab everyone who walks by." Draco snapped.

“You can’t call ‘dibs’ on the Headmistress. It’s incredibly disrespectful to lay claims on a woman.” Snape hissed.

“Are you really still pretending you like women, Snape?” Sirius jeered.

“ _Why_ are you causing a disturbance in the hallway?” Hermione asked in a long-suffering tone.

“I _respect_ women, a concept that is foreign to you, I’m sure.” Snape scowled at Sirius.

“Hermione knows you well enough to know your white-knight statements are full of shit, Snape.” Sirius said.

“So are we playing a game, or not?” Remus asked with a frown.

“Four against two, scared Potter?” Draco sneered. “So much for all that macho talk this morning, you have to hide behind a wall of people to face me."

“You’re the one who ran to go get daddy.” Harry replied coolly.

“For the last time, he’s not my dad!” Draco snapped. Snape shot him a questioning look.

“We’re not family? You seemed curiously silent on that point when your father delivered a riveting speech why I should give you a ‘pass’.” Snape said rounding on Draco.

“Well- yeah- but you’re not my dad technically.” Draco stuttered, as Harry and Sirius began to smile. “Like a step-dad really…”

“Okay, whatever this game is it’s weird and I don’t want it happening in the hallway. Please take it outside or on the Quidditch field.” Hermione told them all.

“I’m not sure I want to play.” Remus admitted.

“Oh look, it’s two verse two again, are you sure you won’t pretend to have some place else to be, Potter?” Draco mocked.

“I like these odds just fine.” Harry replied.

“Fine.” Draco said, crossing his arms.

“So we’re agreed- it’s me and my godfather verses you and your,” Harry smirked. “step-daddy.”

Draco clenched his teeth together tightly as Sirius and Harry exchanged haughty grins.

“And you’re going to do it outside on the Quidditch field!” Hermione announced. “Or I’m going to write all of you up, and I will even hire you, Sirius, so I can write you up as well.”

“Don't worry Headmistress, I’ll make sure this doesn’t get of hand in the hallway. We’ll take this to the Quidditch field, because I respect you.” Sirius said.

“Thank you.” Hermione sighed.

The bell chimed signaling that the class period had begun. Draco was now officially late for his own class.

“Be on the Quidditch field. 5 o’clock.” Harry called to Draco.

"You better show up, Potter!" Draco replied.

Sirius hooked both Remus and Harry's elbows in his and dragged them backward in the hallway, leaving Hermione, Snape and Draco to watch them slowly fade away from their vision.

"I wonder how long he's been planning to use that exit..." Hermione said aloud.

"It wasn't that impressive." Draco lied.

Draco was beginning to think up great new ways to make a flashy exit when he saw Hermione's face turning pink.

Snape had his hands folded behind his back and was looming over her with a knowing half-smirk.

"Stop that!" Draco snapped at him. Snape turned to him looking like an oversized bat. In a show of moral support, Draco took a close step next to Hermione's side.

"Whatever do you mean?" Snape whispered, his black eyes flashing at Draco.

"It's none of your business, Professor Snape." Hermione said mustering up a stern look.

"I'm afraid you're going to have to elaborate on that statement, Headmistress." Snape said with a nasty smile. "I haven't a clue what you're talking about."

"What happens outside of school hours doesn't concern you." Hermione said.

"And what happens in my home does concern me, don't you think?" Snape replied. "I do hope Draco returned what you had left behind, it would put him in an awkward position with his father to explain why he is in possession of such elaborate lingerie." Snape said, slinking away.

Draco tried to put on a brave face for her, but it was apparent she knew they were both in a terrible position.


	9. Gryffindor vs Slytherin

"This is so much worse than you led me to believe, isn't it?" Hermione panicked.  "If Ron finds out- if Harry finds out, do you have any idea how much this could hurt our friendship?" Hermione gasped. "Snape knows this is just the sort of thing to hurt Harry and Ron- and Snape seems to think when your father finds out he'll be more than just a little angry!"

 

He hadn’t seen her this upset since fourth year History of Magic Class when she mixed up the dates for the Troll Skirmish of 1505 and the Goblin War of Dublin of 1507. In his memory she had been in near tears as Binns informed her that her presentation was inaccurate. The Slytherins had laughed at her mercilessly (him included, he was ashamed to admit), while she ran to her desk and frantically flipped through her “History of Magic” textbook, her hands shaking and her breath coming in quick bursts. Now she had that same panicked look as she breathed through her nose heavily, her footsteps pacing in a tight, invisible box.

 

“Calm down.” Draco told her.

 

“ _Don’t_ tell me to ‘calm down’.” Hermione said. She turned away from him and wrung her hands together. “Why did I ever think this could work?” she groaned. She took a few more quick steps away from him.

 

It was all falling apart. Draco felt his insides melting with sick misery. He should have known better than pursue Granger. They had jumped into their relationship too fast and she hadn't understood exactly all she could lose by being associated with him. Now the rose colored glasses had finally fallen from Hermione’s eyes and they were both left with a sobering truth: everyone they cared about would consider their relationship a betrayal.

 

_It won’t be long until she breaks it off._

 

A thick lump was strangling him and he fought to swallow. He didn’t think he could see her everyday without heartache plaguing him. Someone that smart, beautiful, and kind didn’t cross paths with him often in life, if at all- if he stayed at Hogwarts she would be a constant reminder of what he wanted and what he couldn’t keep.

 

His silence caused her to notice him.

 

“Draco…” she said, her voice suddenly soft and full of remorse. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.”

 

“I’m okay.” He lied.

 

She did a cautious half-twist to see down the hallways before returning to him and pulling him into a firm hug.

 

“I didn’t mean to give you the impression that we were over, I’m just venting because I’m worried.” She said. “I feel like I’ve lost Ron...for a while anyway... and I really couldn’t stand it if I lose Harry. But I need you too.”

 

“I know.” He said, fighting to swallow the lump in his throat.

 

He had jumped to conclusions out of sheer insecurity. Thankfully, she was quick enough to recognize his emotional state without him having to say a word.

 

_Merlin, could I admire this woman any more than I do?_

 

He didn’t think so, especially not when she was planting soft, reassuring kisses on his neck and jawline.

 

_I must have looked devastated._

 

He closed his eyes when the trail of kisses came to his lips. He unleashed all the affection he had been holding back from prying eyes in a series of three, deep kisses.

 

_If only we could do this anytime, anywhere we wanted._

 

He leaned forward as she pulled her face away and broke off the kiss.

 

“Maybe we should take this to a more private place.” She suggested in a breathless whisper.

 

“I want to but I can’t,” he said kissing her once more. “I have a class.”

 

The kisses immediately stopped but she hadn’t wrestled out of his embrace.

 

“A class _now_?” She asked with confusion.

 

“...Oops.” Draco said, trying to fight back a laugh at her horrified expression.

 

She opened her mouth a couple of times before closing it. He couldn’t help but chuckle as she feuded within- obviously she wanted to scold him, but he figured she also didn’t want to upset him.

 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” She said. It was the harshest thing she could muster in their current predicament.

 

“This seemed more important.” He said with a shrug. He managed to steal one more kiss before she pulled out of hug.

 

“I know, I know.” He said as she raised an eyebrow. “I’ll get to class.” He assured her with a smile. “So I’m a little late, the students are fine.”

 

* * *

 

"Sorry I’m late I- Whoa! STOP!" Draco shouted.

 

He hustled into the middle of the classroom with his wand out. Saxby and another student was rolling on the floor, fists and elbows being driven in all directions. The other students had gathered in a half-circle around them, cheering them on as they connected blows anywhere they could.

 

" _Repello!_ " Draco shouted as he flicked his wand towards the boys.

 

The half-circle scattered as the two students slid in opposite directions fast enough to cause a squeaking on the floor. The wind was knocked out of Saxby as he slammed into a desk, the other boy let out a strangled 'oof' as his head knocked against the seat of a chair.

 

"Professor Malfoy's joining the fight!" said a Slytherin boy in an excited whoop.

 

"SHHHH! No, don't say that! Are you trying to get me fired!?" Draco panicked. "I ended the fight, and that's what you're going to tell anyone who asks!" Draco insisted. He crossed the room and pulled Saxby to his feet. "You mind telling me why you numbskulls are pummelling each other?" Draco asked.

 

“Gray said you were going to lose!” Saxby explained.

 

“Ten points from Gryffindor.” Draco snapped at Gray.

 

“I’m in Hufflepuff.” Gray puffed, rubbing his jaw.

 

“Ten points from Hufflepuff as well.” Draco said.

 

“Hey, what about Slytherin?” One of the Hufflepuff boys from the sideline whined.

 

Draco ignored him as he inspected Saxby's rapidly bruised eye.

 

“What do you mean I’m going to ‘lose’?” Draco asked.

 

"Sir, we heard you and Professor Snape are going to duel Professor Potter and his friend." one of the girls spoke up.

 

"It's not a duel." A Slytherin girl, Anthea Ramsey spoke. "He's going to play Quidditch. Professor Potter and Professor Malfoy are both Seekers, right?"

 

Draco blanched.  "How do you know about the challenge?" He said. "I've only just got here, it happened less than fifteen minutes ago."

 

"The whole school is talking about it, sir." A Hufflepuff girl spoke up. "We thought you weren’t coming to class so we started making banners."

 

She motioned to the long strips of paper that were flattened on the floor. Desks had been shoved out of the way, Draco had assumed it was for the fight between Saxby and the Hufflepuff boy, but the paints and markers on the floor indicated otherwise.

 

"Did Potter say we’re dueling... or doing a Quidditch match?" Draco asked. He was starting to feel queasy about the entire fiasco. Something about seeing the art supplies on the floor made his (increasingly public) challenge with Harry very real.

 

Everyone looked at each other for answers. Draco was sure now that no one, including himself, had any idea what he’d been challenged to do. Saxby groaned and massaged his fingers, one was puffing up, it looked like it had been jammed.

 

“Dammit Saxby," Draco sighed. "How could you risk damaging your beaters hand in a fist-fight?”

 

The classroom came alive with laughter, boys and girls. Saxby seemed to shrink into himself as the girls tittered.

 

_Note to self, never say ‘beaters hand’ again._

 

"He was calling you a loser and… you're my hero, sir." Saxby said quietly.

 

He'd never been someone else's hero before. Harry Potter must have heard the word one hundred times a day in association with his name; it was flattering, however Draco discovered the expectation and responsibility that came with such admiration as Saxby rubbed his reddened knuckles.

 

" _Great,_ " Draco thought glumly. " _now I've got to win this thing...whatever it is._ "

 

"Get yourself to the infirmary." Draco said. "You too, Hufflepuff." He whistled to Gray.

 

"Please sir," Saxby said eagerly. "Our banner's not done, can't I stay to finish it?"

 

Draco hesitated. Despite inadvertently beating up two of his students, they were looking at him with adoration and wonder as he stood before them. On the ground was a long white strip of paper with a few outlines in green.

 

“Raise your hand if you are going to make a banner.” Draco said. Smiles erupted as hands were held high. Most of the class were reaching for the ceiling. “Keep them up if you’re going to make a banner for me.” He added.

 

A few of the hands began to dip, but the hisses and scowls from the Slytherins caused all of them to float above again. The only Hufflepuff brave enough to risk ridicule was Gray, who had his arms crossed moodily in front of him.

 

“Okay, you can use this class period to make your banners.” Draco said. “But if anyone asks, you learned the ‘quicken’ charm today.”

 

The entire class spread out on the floor in groups. Draco walked between them feeling like a prison guard ready to halt any more fist-fights between his students, though they seemed placated for now. He was glad for the quiet time to think instead of teach, he couldn't figure out what everyone was cheering him on for.

 

A few Hufflepuff girls were huddled in a corner with their banner. They tightened together more as Draco walked by. He looked down at their preliminary sketch and frowned.

 

“That looks a “P”...” Draco said aloud, hovering over them. “That wouldn’t be ‘P’ for ‘Potter’, would it?”

 

“It’s for ‘P’ for Professor!” A Hufflepuff girl squeaked. He squinted at her doubtfully. “It is- I swear!”

 

A Slytherin named Edgar Ethridge hopped over the desks nimbley and shoved his way through the girl-wall to look.

 

“It doesn’t look like there’s enough room to get “Professor Malfoy” on the banner, but there’s enough room for ‘Potter’!” Edgar said.

 

“Good eye, Ethridge. Five points to Slytherin.” Draco said. The Hufflepuff girls were watching Draco closely and shooting Ethridge nasty looks. “Well?” Draco prodded the girls sternly.

 

One of the Huffle-girls looked into his eyes as she wrote an “r” very tightly next to the “P”. Draco smiled.

 

"Looks very good, ladies." Draco encouraged them before walking away.

 

"Professor Malfoy, tell us what you think of ours!" Anthea Ramsey shouted eagerly.

 

Draco walked toward the middle of the room to observe his House's progress. The mental image of his father's Irish wolfhounds popped into his mind once he arrived before them. On a few occasions Draco would dangle steak bones above the dog's heads while they sat with every muscle tensed and their eyes bulging out of their doggy-heads as they focused on their prize.

 

That was sort of how the Slytherin girls were looking at him... like a juicy piece of meat. He tried not to notice two of the girls whispering when he studied their banner.

 

On the banner was the drawing of a huge, green dragon blowing the words 'Go Professor Malfoy' in fire.

 

"Excellent artistic direction!" Draco said with a smile.

 

“It was my idea!” Anthea said. “Because your name is ‘Draco’.”

 

“Yeah!” Draco said nodding. “Good.”

 

The girls soaked up his praise and gave him dreamy smiles of their own. Draco nodded again, wondering if they were going to stare at him all period instead of finishing their artwork. They had stiff smiles on their faces as he nodded again and they smiled wider. He was wondering how to back out of this extremely awkward staring frenzy.

 

"Where's the banner for Professor Snape?" Ethridge suddenly asked Ramsey with a slight bitter edge. "Or isn't he handsome enough to get one?"

 

"Shut your gob, Edgar!" She snapped, her face going red. "This is our banner- _you_ go make one for Professor Snape!"

 

"I can't because you took all the paper for Professor Malfoy!" Edgar told her.

 

"So get some more!" Another girl said.

 

"Guys, there's no need to fight," _over me._ Draco thought holding up a hand. "You can get more paper. Saxby-"

 

"Aye-aye, sir!" Saxby said, getting to his feet.

 

"No, don't do that." Draco sighed. "Just say, 'yes'."

 

"Yes... sir?" Saxby said.

 

"Go with Ethridge to get more paper." Draco ordered him.

 

Saxby looked a little heartbroken to be leaving the group of girls for the dragon poster, but nodded without argument.

 

Even though the banners were interesting, they were a clear reminder to Draco that a challenge lay ahead of him. He had been trash-talking with Potter the entire time he'd been there, if he lost to Potter he'd have to withstand Harry rubbing his failure in his face every time Draco mocked him.

 

Should he cheat? It worked before...before he had royally messed up things by having a conscience.

 

" _I can't go into this challenge blind._ " Draco thought. " _It would be smart of me to check-in with Professor Snape and see what he has planned."_

 

Draco's mind was feeling a little burnt-out from all the high-tension situations, he welcomed Snape stepping in and saving the day.

 

* * *

 

People were more excited for the challenge than Draco imagined. He thought his class was especially into it, but while trekking to the dungeons it was confirmed the challenge-mania was a school-wide.

 

"Good luck Professor Malfoy!" A Ravenclaw third year boy called to him in the halls as soon as he stepped out from his classroom.

 

That had started off a loud bout of chantings consisting of "good luck" and "Go Slytherin!" as he walked swiftly down the halls towards the Potions classroom. Every step he took caused the voices of students to sing their praises- and some jeers- and Draco felt as if they were shouting the jelly-nerve curse at him.

 

His focused on blocking out everything out but a cluster of professors were calling his name. Trelawney and Luna were standing near one of Hogwart’s threadbare tapestries and waving him over frantically. Neville Longbottom was with them but he looked less enthusiastic to have Draco come over. Draco nodded irritably to show he saw them but had no intentions of slowing his pace.

 

"I haven't the time!" Draco barked rushing past them.

 

"Wait!" Luna pleaded.

 

It was the only warning Luna would give him. She let out a grunt of effort as she chucked what looked like a beet necklace woven at the stems around his neck. Draco coughed when the heavy vegetables bounced against this chest and throat roughly. With one hand he grabbed the front of the woven necklace in shock.

 

"Hey!" Draco shouted as he rubbed his throat. He wasn't sure how anything Luna did caught him off guard anymore. "Are you mental?"

 

"Bullseye!" Luna said with a broad smile.

 

Draco took off the necklace by yanking it hard, causing the woven circle to break.

 

"What in Merlin's name do you think you're doing?" Draco said. "Why are you throwing vegetables at me?" He said shaking the beets in her face. “This isn’t funny, Longbottom! I’m tired of your insane games, they’re not cute.”

 

"It's not what you think- she didn't mean-." Neville said in an unsteady stutter, he stepped in front of Luna blocking Draco from her view.

 

Draco scowled at Neville but the man didn’t back down.

 

“Finally grew a spine, huh?” Draco hissed softly. Neville didn’t blink, Draco wasn’t even sure he was breathing.

 

Luna’s face popped up over Neville’s shoulder as stood on her toes to face Draco. She was still smiling, seemingly completely unaware of the tense atmosphere.

 

"It's for good luck." Luna explained. "I gave one to Harry too, I hope you don't mind."

 

"I've got three galleons on you." Trelawny said with a slanted smirk.

 

"And I've bet the secret to my legendary green bean casserole on you." Luna told him in a dreamy voice.

 

Draco held out the broken 'beet necklace' with disgust.

 

"It's a good guess, but it's not made with beets." She said. Her eyes then went wide and she looked at the beets with excitement. “But maybe I could-”

 

“No, Luna, no more beets.” Neville begged. “Your green bean casserole is _fine_ without them.”

 

"I don’t have time to babble with you crazy people!" Draco huffed, shoving the beets in Neville's arms.

 

"I see success as a glowing aura around you, dear!" Trelawny assured him before he scurried away. Draco's nose wrinkled as he caught the distinct smell of cooking sherry on her breath.

 

He suspected Trelawny's support of Slytherin stemmed from the dislike she held for Potter and especially Potters bestie- Headmistress Granger. If only she knew Draco was intimate with Hermione, he thought his aura would read much different.

 

Draco wrenched open the heavy door to the potion classroom and closed it hastily behind him to drown out the voices and insanity.

 

He wasn't surprised to see his father standing next to Snape's blackboard. Lucius was smudging Snape's neat, tight handwriting with his index finger lazily as Snape tried not to look bothered by it, though Draco could see his mentor's jaw tighten with every finger-stroke.

 

“What's this with you and Draco setting up some epic school production against Black and Potter?” Lucius asked sharply, avoiding Snape's irritated gaze.

 

"You never went home, did you?" Snape asked dryly.

 

"...If you must know, I was trying to find another painting for the study." Lucius huffed, finally turning his attention to Snape.

 

Draco caught Snape hesitate in the middle of his reproachful gaze- he had a curious expression on his face, like he was trying hard not to smile.

 

"Lucius, you can't take whatever you like out of Hogwarts to decorate our home." Snape told him. "It's school property, and some of those paintings have been here for centuries."

 

"You donate a painting, you take a painting." Lucius sang as he shrugged. "As long as they're roughly the same size it doesn't matter. No one notices."

 

Snape stared at him wordlessly before raising his eyebrows slowly.

 

"I'm not stealing, I'm taking them on loan, I'll put them back this Spring." Lucius laughed. He seemed determined to not feel bad about his questionably legal activities.  "Museums need to update their exhibits, Hogwarts could use a different look."

 

"Does Granger know you've appointed yourself as Hogwart’s first interior decorator?" Snape said with a smirk. "Or is this subtle attack part of your agenda to make her think she’s slowly going mad?"

 

"Stop trying to change the subject- I'm upset with you." Lucius said quickly. "And you, Draco, I see you slinking in the corner!"

 

"I wasn't slinking." Draco replied.

 

"Perhaps you can explain what being "too busy" for me means when the two of you are out having fun testing yourself against those Gryffin-dullards?" Lucius snapped.

 

“I told you it wasn’t planned.” Snape told him slowly.

 

“So it just happened?” Lucius mocked him. “You just ran into those idiots and Hogwarts biggest stand-off of the century spontaneously blossomed into this evenings entertainment?”

 

“...Yes.” Snape said after a pause.

 

“You really must think I’m stupid.” Lucius growled. Snape didn't say anything, and swore he saw his father's eyes steel. “And you know what my response is to this insult, Severus? I’m cheering for Black and Potter.”

 

"Dad!" Draco shouted indignantly.

 

“Lucius!” Snape shouted, following suit.

 

“Yes, and you want to know why?" Lucius informed them with perverse vengeance. "Not even Black and Potter would expect me to believe that you two haven’t been purposely keeping me out-of-the-loop. You both insult me!”

 

“If you cheer for Black or Potter I will file for a divorce.” Snape said in a waspish tone. “And I will send you a howler every day of your life reminding you how awful a husband you were when I needed your love and support the most.”

 

“I wasn’t really going to do it, Severus!” Lucius said angrily. “ ...Would you really file for divorce?”

 

“I would think about it.” Snape said softly, his fury ebbing at Lucius' hurt gaze.

 

“Can we focus, please?” Draco snapped. “The whole school is going insane over this stupid spectacle and we have no idea what the hell we're doing! I don’t want to look like an idiot with my wand out and nothing to show for it!”

 

"...What do you mean?" Lucius asked blankly.

 

"I meant it when I said this inane pissing-match was never planned." Snape said.

 

"You two amaze me." Lucius said with a mocking smile. "You have no time for me, but you both have all the time in the world to do literally _anything_ on a Quidditch field with Black and Potter!"

 

Snape caught Draco's eye. Snape seemed to be communicating something behind his black orbs, there was a definite prodding for action in his expression.

 

 _"I get it, I owe you one."_ Draco thought.

 

"Father, I mistakenly dragged Professor Snape into this challenge. Potter and Black jumped me in the hallway, and Snape joined in to defend me." Draco said. "He's doing this on my behalf. It was never about you or not wanting to spend time with you."

 

"You know I enjoy your company more than anything." Snape said gently.

 

Lucius looked between the both of them and let his expression of disapproval linger before drawing a sigh.

 

"You two test a man's patience." Lucius told them stiffly.

 

Snape's lip twitched unpleasantly as Lucius turned back to the blackboard.

 

"I suppose it would be bad luck to be upset with you before your...whatever the pair of you are doing." Lucius sighed as he wiped out the word "not" written in chalk.

 

It now read, " _Do    add roc egg essence before the potion simmers._ " Lucius smirked as he studied Snape, whose nostrils were flaring, but still hadn't interrupted him.

 

"So... any ideas how we want to play this out?" Draco asked hopefully.

 

“I don't want to be stuck guessing what we're doing in front of an audience." Snape said, turning away from Lucius. "We have to get Potter and Black to agree on something. Let's take initiative, we should make it clear we’re challenging them to a duel.”

 

“That’s a good idea.” Draco said grinning. "I know lots of curses I’d like to throw at Potter."

 

"Then it's settled, we should- Lucius- STOP! What are you, a child?" Snape snarled while Lucius gave him an innocent look.

 

His father had manipulated " _Assess your work_ " into " _Ass       work_ ". Draco couldn't hold back a chuckle, causing Snape's lip to curl into a deeper snarl.

 

"Sorry." Draco apologized as he fought to keep a smile off his face.

 

"Draco, tell Black and Potter we're challenging them to a duel. Now." Snape said.

 

"Mmm, bossy." Lucius purred.

 

"Don't you have anything to fill your days rather than needling me?" Snape hissed.

 

"I'm afraid not Darling, you're too tempting. You take yourself so seriously and you never disappoint to amuse." Lucius replied.

 

"You need a new hobby." Snape said darkly. Lucius laughed and pulled him into an embrace that Snape didn't return.

 

"But why?" Lucius teased him. Snape opened his mouth to say something but was cut off as Lucius roughly nuzzled his cheek. An amused chuckle escaped his father as Snape scowled deeper.

 

"Father, do you really need to do that now?" Draco sighed feeling awkward.

 

"You’re still here?" Lucius asked Draco with a stiff smile. "Severus, didn't you tell the boy to make himself useful?"

 

Snape's lip curled slightly.

 

“I guess I’ll go deliver the message to Potter.” Draco said.

 

“Close the door on your way out.” Lucius told ordered him.

 

“ _They make me do everything._ ” Draco thought.

 

* * *

 

Draco found Potter and Black in the Defense Against Dark Arts classroom, along with the werewolf Lupin tagging along as usual. The three of them were standing on chairs with their wands out. Draco saw the bones of a dragon floating in the air while Harry worked to get them tethered to the ceiling. None of them had noticed Draco had entered the room.

 

"I'm sorry Harry," Sirius was apologizing with a sheepish grin. "but you must admit it was funny when it chased that back-talking hooligan."

 

"His mother is going to give me howlers for weeks." Harry sighed. "The only thing worse than that woman's shrill voice is her haircut- at least she can't send me her mullet by owl."

 

"Potter!" Draco boomed.

 

The sudden burst of sound shocked Harry, and Draco smiled as he jumped in place and wobbled on the chair. The jawbone of the dragon dropped dangerously close to hitting Lupin in the face, but the werewolf managed to catch it with his wand before it slammed into the desks.

 

"Malfoy, are you psychotic? You could have hurt somebody!" Harry said, his face pale.

 

"A little on edge, are you?" Draco said with a laugh. He strolled next to a desk and sat on it with a confident smile. "You should be, I'm here to deliver a message. Professor Snape and I challenge you and your fleabag to a duel."

 

Sirius and Harry didn't seemed the least bit perturbed by his announcement, though they did float the remaining dragon bones to the ground and got off their chairs.

 

"Are you alright?" Black asked Lupin. Lupin nodded and Black clasped his shoulder. "That was a good save, how come you never tried out for Keeper during school?"

 

"Are you joking?” Remus replied. “I had my hands full enough being a teenaged werewolf and keeping you and James from turning into little hellions."

 

"Hey- don't ignore me!" Draco seethed. "Did you hear what I said?"

 

"Yes Malfoy, we heard you." Harry replied with a strain in his voice. “You’re challenging us to a duel.”

 

“You really want to do a duel? Does Slytherin have any imagination at all?” Sirius mocked.

 

“What did you have in mind, mutt? A dog-food eating contest?” Draco sneered. "Either agree to duel with us or admit defeat.”

 

“We'll do neither." Harry replied. "You're too late- due to your reputation for cheating we contracted McGonagall as arbitrator. She has our challenge planned for this evening."

 

“What’s the challenge?” Draco asked.

 

“Don’t know.” Harry admitted.

 

There were three things he knew McGonagall loved: Quidditch, Gryffindor winning the House Cup, and fairness. There would be very little space to wiggle out a win through trickery.

 

“The head of Gryffindor House is overseeing our challenge? That’s not fair.” Draco snapped.

 

“We’re not doing this for house points.” Sirius said. “It’s a private dispute so McGonagall won’t be biased.”

 

_Dammit, he’s right._

 

“You can’t pretend she likes Slytherins and won’t do all she can to help you win.” Draco said.

 

Harry was climbing back on the chair and pulling his wand out again. The bones began to float up to his chin as he shuffled through them.

 

“Professor Snape and I didn’t agree to making McGonagall in charge!” Draco insisted.

 

“I’ve got a class to teach- whine about it to McGonagall.” Harry said in a bored tone.

 

“I’m not whining!” Draco snapped.

 

“That was a whine.” Sirius pointed out.

 

“No it bloody wasn’t!” Draco said hotly.

 

“And that was a whine about a whine.” Sirius said. Lupin was biting his bottom lip to stifle a laugh.

 

“You think you’re so funny!” Draco said standing up.

 

Sirius shrugged.

 

“Enjoy your stupid jokes now, because it doesn’t matter if McGonagall or Godric Gryffindor himself was judging this contest, Snape and I are going to beat you so bad the entire school will give you a trophy for being Hogwart’s biggest losers.” Draco said through barred teeth.

 

“If they were handing out trophies for Hogwarts Biggest Losers, they would have to build an entire wing dedicated to Snape to hold them.” Sirius replied.

 

Remus and Harry burst out in laughter as Draco searched for a proper comeback. Sirius was grinning as the seconds flew by without a response. Instead of challenging Black with an answer Draco turned on his heel and flipped a desk before storming out of the classroom.

 

“Is he always ‘on’ like that?” Lupin asked.

 

“Ever since I didn’t shake his hand in first year.” Harry said as he attached twine around a rib bone.

 

“Huh.” Lupin mused. “Ever wonder what he’d be like if you did?”

 

“Never.” Harry admitted.

 

* * *

 

 

_I can’t lose. I won’t lose._

 

When Draco knocked on the door he found Hermione neck-deep in stacks of paper with student's home addresses on it. He surmised they were progress reports. She was waving them into each envelope with her wand with a slightly dreamy expression.

 

"Can't you hire an intern for that?" Draco asked her. He saw her peer at him over the little wall of papers and smile at him.

 

"You mean give your father a proper job here?" Hermione teased him.

 

"Not if you want it done properly." Draco laughed. He moved a stack of send-ready envelopes on the chair and sat on her desk. "You know part of being the boss means you don't have to do the grunt-work."

 

"The smell of parchment and the silence clears my mind." She admitted. He leaned over a mountain of envelopes and delivered her a spirited kiss.  "So, who sent you to the Headmistress's office? Getting in trouble before your big event with Harry?"

 

"Hermione, my turtle-dove, my sweet lover, my burning star-" Draco started.

 

"Uh-oh." Hermione sighed.

 

"'Uh-oh'?" Draco questioned.

 

"There's only one reason for you to over-do a compliment....you're going to ask me to do something unorthodox, aren't you?" Hermione asked.

 

"I'm afraid I don't know what you mean, love." Draco feigned a laugh and flashed her an innocent smile.

 

"Do they teach you that act at charm school?" Hermione said raising an eyebrow. "If so, you should ask for a refund."

 

"Charm school?" Draco repeated. "What sort of childhood did you think I had?"

 

"You've never gone to charm school?" Hermione asked.

 

"Of course not." Draco laughed.

 

"...Or anything like charm school?" Hermione said with a hint of a smile.

 

"Yes, I was trained in proper etiquette, but everyone learns-" Draco began. She was beginning to laugh at him. "That's not what I came here to discuss. This isn't easy for me to admit, but I got myself into a bit of a bind...I need your help."

 

"I'll do what I can." Hermione said.

 

"That's my girl!" Draco said with a smile.

 

"If it's ethical, of course." Hermione said.

 

"Ugh..." Draco groaned.

 

"That's a problem, is it?" Hermione said with a knowing glance. She leaned her chin on a hand and looked up at him. "I'll save you an embarrassing bout of insincere flattery, I already know what you're going to ask."

 

"Oh?"

 

"Harry asked me the same thing and the answer is no, I'm not going to tell you what McGonagall has organized for this evening." Hermione said pleasantly.

 

"I'm your boyfriend." Draco said. "Don't you want the entire school to think your boyfriend is a winner?"

 

"I don't care who wins, I only encouraged the event to get this big because it's a welcome distraction from our predicament." Hermione informed him.

 

"But students are making posters for me. They're practically writing songs of me in the hallways, if Snape and I lose it'll be so humiliating." Draco pleaded.

 

"I like the idea of Professor Snape being humiliated in front of an audience, he could use a taste of his own medicine." Hermione replied.

 

"Maybe, but _I_ didn't do anything wrong." Draco said. “I don’t want to lose. ...You're really not going to help me?"

 

“Telling you what I know wouldn’t help you win against Harry and Sirius.” She said. “McGonagall came up with an idea that would make it impossible for you to cheat...you know why she went to such lengths.” Hermione told him. “Relax, I think you and Professor Snape will do very well. Now that’s all I’m telling you.”

 

“But you didn’t tell me anything.” Draco pouted. “Are you certain I can’t seduce something out of you?”

 

“Well…” Hermione said with a devious smirk. “You won’t know for certain until you try.”

 

* * *

 

He didn’t learn that much from Hermione, at least, nothing he could apply to Harry and Sirius on the field. But Draco felt much, much better when he returned to the dungeons to deliver Snape the news of that evening’s event.

 

He found Snape and his father leaning against the Potion’s classroom desk. The blackboard was completely smeared and only a few words were legible. Draco tried to block out the knowledge that his father's hair, which was previously tied up by a ribbon, was now down as well as the top three buttons on Snape's robe unclasped.

 

_Merlin’s god, was my father and I having synchronized snogging-sessions?_

 

It was too disturbing a notion to follow-up with further thinking. Draco destroyed the thought by visualizing balling up it up like a crumpled piece of parchment and throwing it into a large inferno in his mind’s eye.

 

"Well?" Snape said impatiently.

 

He must have let his mind wander too long. Snape and his father were looking at him expectantly as he stood before them.

 

“We might be in trouble.” Draco informed them.

 

“How so?” Snape asked.

 

“They’re not going to duel us, they contracted McGonagall to plan the event.” Draco said.

 

“Minerva?” Snape hissed. “Did you agree to that!?”

 

“No! And she’s keeping it a secret too.” Draco said.

 

"Now now, let's not lose our wits." Lucius said calmly. "We haven't lost our classic Slytherin charms." He said with a smirk. "Draco, go to McGonagall and give her a reason to reveal to you your task. And make it saucy- who knows the last time she was romanced?"

 

"You want me to seduce a 100 year-old lady?" Draco said, looking at his father incredulously. "You don't think she'll see right through that?"

 

"I did not gift you my exemplary cheekbones to make you satisfied with mediocrity." Lucius said to him haughtily. "She's female, your face will do the charming for you. You're a Malfoy so start thinking like one, compliment her...ah...her eyeglasses and she'll tell you anything."

 

"You know Professor McGonagall isn't like every other woman. My cheekbones won't work on her, she thinks I'm a total Slytherin prat." Draco whined. "If you're so confident in the family looks you should do it!"

 

"Don't be ridiculous!" Lucius huffed. He grabbed Snape's hand firmly. "My cheekbones are spoken for, yours are still single."

 

"I have a girlfriend." Draco said firmly.

 

"Right, your girlfriend." Lucius hummed. "It occurred to me you made her up to keep me from hounding you about being single."

 

"I didn't make her up!" Draco fumed. "Is that what you think? That I'm so pathetic I need to make up relationships with women?"

 

"It all makes sense.” Lucius told him gently. “Where would you find the time to get a girlfriend when you're constantly skulking in this poorly-run institution?"

 

"I met her at Hogsmeade!" Draco lied.

 

"Ha- as if I haven't heard that one before!" Lucius laughed. He turned to Snape with a devious smile. "Do you remember Eli Booth? He was a sixth year when you were second year; he was constantly crowing about getting laid over the summer with his 'girlfriend back home'. Every time we pressed him for answers he'd say, 'you wouldn't know her, she goes to Durmstrang.'"

 

"She _is_ real!" Draco said hotly.

 

"Then I suppose you wouldn't object to inviting her to dinner on Sunday?" Lucius asked.

 

"No, I don't want you to scare her off." Draco said firmly.

 

"’Scare her off’? What is she, Draco, a rabbit?” Lucius laughed. His face fell slightly. “She’s not a rabbit, is she?”

 

“No, she’s not a rabbit!” Draco fumed. “Do you really believe I’ve gone absolutely mental?”

 

“You’re dating a woman that no one has met and that you are purposely trying to keep unavailable.” Lucius reasoned. “You haven’t had a girlfriend in years, any warm-blooded male would go a little-”

 

“Stop winding him up.” Snape ordered Lucius firmly as Draco’s jaw dropped further in anger. “I need him at his best for this evening.”

 

“This isn’t over.” Lucius whispered to Draco.

 

“...I need to decompress.” Draco said. He had to put as much distance between his father and himself before he lost his cool. “See you later.” He said to Snape.

 

He didn’t trust himself to keep his head level under his father’s constant heckling. If he was being honest with himself, he recognized that he had been dangerously tempted to shout that Hermione Granger was his girlfriend, and was in fact very real.

 

* * *

 

Draco retreated to his bedroom and spent his precious free time coaching himself not to be aware of the knots in his stomach. He lay in bed with h is eyes closed, trying to conserve his energy, but as soon as he heard a knock on his door his body swung into full alert.

 

Snape was dressed in his loose-fitting robes, possibly to allow the most movement in case they were involved in a physical challenge. It was almost time for their face-off and Snape suggested they show up early. Draco pulled on his winter hat hastily and locked his door.

 

"It's not going to be bad." Draco said as he rushed to keep up with Snape's long strides. "I think whatever it is we're going to do exceptionally well."

 

"Is that what your girlfriend told you?" Snape said without looking at him.

 

"...Yes." Draco admitted. Snape's lip curled into a sneer. "What? You asked!"

 

“She didn’t happen to tell you what’s in store for us, did she?” Snape asked.

 

“No.” Draco said. “Potter asked too, she wouldn’t tell him either.”

 

“Typical Granger.” Snape huffed.

Draco chose to ignore Snape’s shot against his girlfriend. He really couldn’t waste the energy arguing with him.

 

In the distance he could see the Quidditch field was bustling, but not with students.

 

When the Draco arrived on the pitch he wasn’t mentally prepared for what he saw. In an act of rebellion he had once swallowed konig bile and suffered other-worldly hallucinations. (A terrifying experience which killed all motivation to pursue drugs for recreation.) Draco thought maybe what he was seeing was a byproduct of someone's experimenting with the toxic substance. In a mere afternoon the entire Quidditch field had transformed into a red and white sparkled, sequin dreamscape; a very large platform had been erected in the middle giving all houses a spectacular view of a stage striped like a giant candy-cane.

 

" _McGonagall_ planned this?" Draco said in awe. He had always pegged her as a woman obsessed with tartan.

 

Snape didn't seem to have an answer for him. His mentor was frowning and drinking it all in with  a calculating look. Draco figured he must have been struggling just as much as him with the thought the elderly Gryffindor witch envisioning such ghastly, tacky decor.

 

It looked more like they were going to a circus than facing Potter and Black in a challenge. Was he supposed to do some sort of act? An act takes preparation and he didn't think Snape was the sort to encapture the joy and awe of an audience. How could Hermione have thought Snape and Draco would do well with _this_?

 

A slew of young wizards were moving three cushy, red and white striped chairs onto the platform and not paying Draco or Snape any mind.

 

“I’m at a loss.” Draco admitted.

 

“Over there- make sure it’s level!”

 

Draco’s insides clenched- the mystery was solved. McGonagall hadn't had the frontal lobe of her brain manipulated with questionable substances and taken an unnatural fancy to circus-chic, instead she had delegated the challenge to someone else to handle and design.

 

Fred and George Weasley strolled onto the platform and began directing the young movers to place four podiums in the middle of it. They were both dressed in matching, poorly-tailored muggle suits, but that wasn’t their greatest offense to someone like Draco who had never worn ill-fitting, garish clothes in his life. They were an eyesore because every surface of their clothing was covered in red sequins and glitter which made them look like twin flames dancing on the stage.

 

“What the fresh hell is this?” Draco growled. “Are we recreating one of the Weasley’s fever-dreams?”

 

"Minerva..." Snape had hissed her name like a curse.

 

Draco spotted each of the podiums had a hand-held device with a single glittery red button. He followed Snape up the stairs and copied his movements as Snape turned the device in his thin fingers studying it closely.

 

“Hello Professor.” George greeted them cheerfully. Draco only knew it was George from the giant white “G” in the middle of his chest.

 

“‘Professors’.” Draco corrected him.

 

“No, we’re not professors.” Fred teased as he butted into the conversation.

 

“We never even graduated.” George informed them. “Professor Snape was right about that-”

 

“-But wrong when he said we’d never amount to anything-” Fred said.

 

“-That we’re an evolutionary defect on the undeserving, twisted creature called called ‘man’-”

 

“-Implying our highest achievement would be to kill ourselves as a prank-”

 

“-And other cruel things said throughout our school years here."

 

The twins paused their act. Snape was glaring at them but his silence made it clear there would be no apology.

 

"Unprofessional hosts would remember the unkind words spoken from his former professor and professor's lacky until an unlikely opportunity arrived to skew them in an unfavorable light during a public event-”

 

“-But no worries because we’re just two wildly successful, professional men of business who have our sights forward and aren’t interested in dwelling in the past!” Fred insisted. Draco winced as a cluster of glitter on Fred’s chest reflected a patch of sunlight in his eye.

 

“Harry!” They both sang happily in their twin-chorus.

 

Draco shrank into himself as Fred and George rushed past him in a shiney red blur to embrace Potter, who had just arrived with Black.

 

“We’re going to lose.” Draco said to Snape miserably.

 

“We’re not quitting.” Snape told him firmly. He was scowling at Sirius Black who was flipping Fred’s sequined lapel with intrigue.

 

“You heard them, they’re going to do everything they can to fuck us over.” Draco spat.

 

“So let’s unfuck ourselves by winning.” Snape replied silkily.

 

The movers shuffled Draco and Snape to the assigned podiums and gave Fred and George a quick nod. Students from all houses were showing up in large clumps and beginning to fill the House stands. Draco saw the crowds pointing to the stage and laughing with excitement. Banners were being lifted and people were filling in. A banner from Hufflepuff was being hoisted in the air, held up by numerous girls.

 

“That deceitful cow!” Draco seethed.

 

Snape turned to him with a questioning glance. Draco motioned to the banner in the Hufflepuff stands with disgust. The word “Prof Potter” was scrunched together extremely tightly.

 

“She told me she was making that banner for me!” Draco snapped.

 

Snape pursed his lips together and ignored Draco, probably out of his own version of politeness.

 

McGonagall took the stage and seated herself in one of the striped chairs. Although three chairs had been brought out for them, the twins didn’t seem to like sitting down much. Instead they worked the crowd by jumping around on stage sharing the odd sparkly microphone between them which had some sort of levitation charm. It had a long string on it that they would use to swing it around like a lasso, and currently they were keeping the crowd entertained by tossing it to each other artfully as they ran up and down the platform.

 

“Heeeeello Hogwarts!" George called into the microphone once the entire school had gotten settled. "Gryffindors- let’s hear some noise!”

 

A loud roar erupted from the Gryffindor stands as they stomped their feet while shaking their banners. George flung the microphone to Fred who caught it one-handed.

 

“Welcome Hufflepuffs!” Fred sang into the microphone.

 

Cheers from the Hufflepuff box boomed through the air as Fred danced in front of his chair.

 

“And Ravenclaws!” Fred shouted.

 

The Ravenclaws anticipated their cheering performance and managed to quickly organize an impressive “wave” in the stands with hearty enthusiasm. Fred passed the mic to George.

 

“Okay, let’s get this show on the road-” George started.

 

“Weasley.” McGonagall’s warning carried into the microphone faintly as she shot him a dirty look from her seat.

 

“Just kidding Professor! Make some noise, Slytherin.” George said flatly. The Slytherins were beginning to cheer but George cut them off by talking over them. “We have two teams for today’s challenge- on team Gryffindor we have the Boy-Who-Kicked-Voldemort’s-Pale-”

 

“Weasley!” McGonagall warned for the second time.

 

“-Tail, Harry Potter!” Fred finished for George.

 

Draco kept his expression blank as the entire school went wild. Potter waved to the crowd with a humble smile, the direction he waved to just happened to be towards a group of girls and they pretended (Draco hoped) to faint in their seats in joyous rapture.

 

“Standing next to the indomitable Harry Potter is a personal favorite of ours, Sirius ‘I beat the rap sheet’ Black!” Fred shouted heartily.

 

Sirius laughed as the cheers echoed off the field. Draco was incredibly jealous over how relaxed and confident they seemed, and if the twins were as biased as he thought they would be, the Gryffindors would have nothing to be nervous about.

 

“On the Slytherin team we have two candidates....” George said as he walked toward their podiums. Snape scowled as glitter from George’s outfit floated toward him.

 

“Yes, our noble Gryffindors will be going up against the embodiment of all we.. _admire ..._ about Slytherin, Severus Snape.” Fred announced.

 

The Slytherins cheered loudly enough, but it didn't drown out the unenthusiastic, polite clapping from the other stands.

 

“And lastly, you may know him as Hogwarts most notorious ferret-” George announced. There were no cheers or clapping or banner waving, only laughter and a few ‘boos’ from the Slytherin box for what was perceived as a lame joke. Draco looked into the Gryffindor box caught Hermione’s pained smile in the crowd.

 

“If you can’t do this properly then I’ll find someone else!” McGonagall snapped. She was raising out of her seat like a cobra.

 

“Sorry again Professor.” Fred said quickly. “You might know him from other names whispered behind his back, but we will politely just call him ‘Draco Malfoy’ for your viewing pleasure- hey-.”

 

McGonagall moved fast for an older woman, she had jumped to her feet and was pulling the string, which had draped on the floor, in an attempt to yank the mic out of Fred's hand. George rushed to her side sputtering apologies as Fred twisted the mic around himself for better leverage.

 

“You can’t fire us, we volunteered-” George said faintly. McGonagall gave another warning yank.

 

“Okay, let’s go over the rules!” Fred said quickly. He had gotten control of the mic while George was trying to lead McGonagall back to her chair. “In front of all our candidates is a buzzer, we’ll ask a question and whoever clicks-in first and answers correctly will get one point. Once your team has acquired five points you win the challenge. Go ahead and give a click, contestants, to show your buzzers are working."

 

Draco pressed the glittery button and a shower of emerald and silver sparks showered over him.

 

"Pyrotechnics brought to you by Weasley's Wizard Wheezes." Fred said into the mic. "Okay, let's get started!

 

George pulled out a card from his breast pocket and caught the mic his brother threw without even looking at it.

 

“First question, don't forget to buzz in with the answer," George reminded them. "What dance was outlawed in 1953 for being ‘too dangerous’?” George read from the card.

 

Draco pressed his buzzer with ernest, excitement flowing through him. His sparks flew into the air. Black was looking bitter, he must have known the answer only to be beaten.

 

“The Cabbert-Clap!” Draco said with a grin. Black slapped his buzzer down with frustration, confirming that Draco’s answer had also been his own.

 

Long ago his grandmother (on his mother’s side) had told him in full grisly detail about her brother dying in a tragic ‘clabbert-clap’ accident at a very wild, restricted party in America. It was a popular story during family gatherings, and apparently Black must have retained the tale from his family-party days as well.

 

“Correct.” George announced.

 

A point was added under Slytherin on the Quidditch scoreboard for all to see. Draco caught Harry’s eye and smirked. The one-point lead eased his nerves and winning seemed like a reachable goal now.

 

“Question two," George said pulling out another card from his jacket. "Name the current Keeper for the Chudley Cannons!”

 

“Who would know that?” Draco snapped in frustration. “That team is pure rubbish!”

 

"And Draco speaks out of turn without even an answer- what do you think, George, a rude interruption from team Slytherin warrants giving Gryffindor a free stab at the answer?"

 

"I think that's only fair, Fred." He cleared his throat. " 'We must have order'." he said into the mic with a nerve-wrackingly accurate impression of Umbrage.

 

"Wait a minute-" Draco raged.

 

"Shut up, Draco!" Snape snarled, sparks were flying from his buzzer, even though he hadn’t pressed it.

 

“Does Gryffindor have an answer?” George asked, leaning against Harry’s podium.

 

“I believe the current Keeper is Maria Kelly.” Harry said confidently.

 

Draco struggled not to lose his temper. It was obvious to him that the Weasley’s were asking questions they thought Potter and Black would know the answers to, although that didn’t seem to occur to McGonagall.

 

"And Gryffindor scores a point!" Fred said waving his wand at the scoreboard. The stands cheered. "Harry certainly knows his lady Quidditch-players! Just kidding Professor, I'm sure he know the blokes too-" Fred said as McGonagall's lips got thinner.

 

“Question three," George said. "In what year did the fabulous Weasley' Wizard Wheezes officially open to the public?”

 

Snape was pressing his buzzer in a frenzy as he raced against Harry- unfortunately Potter was faster and red and gold sparks flew from his buzzer.

 

"Harry, your answer please." George said into the mic.

 

“1996!” Harry said very clearly.

 

“Oooo, I'm so very sorry to inform you...," George said sadly, "...Slytherin team that team Gryffindor is on fire!" He laughed. "Yes folks, you heard it directly from Harry Potter's mouth, Weasley's Wizard Wheezes has been delivering affordable, quality products since 1996-”

 

“This is not a platform to promote your business!” McGonagall chided them. She must had used the _Sonorus_ charm to magnify her voice.

 

"Of course not, of course not." George said through a charming smile. It was now Fred's turn to calm down McGonagall. He rushed to her side and was busy making pacifying gestures as George pulled another question-card out.

 

"Question four: The Futu-bird is often the bane of tourists for its propensity to steal items of the colour purple and is native to what cluster of islands?"

 

Snape didn't seem to know the answer and Draco's heart sank because he didn't know it either. The predicted gold and red sparks erupted from the other team as they stood in silence.

 

"Mr. Black?" George said.

 

"Fiji." Sirius replied.

 

Another point went on the scoreboard.

 

"And the score tallies-up three-to-one with Harry Potter and Sirius Black in the lead!" Fred said joyfully. The stands cheered.

 

"It's a rigged game." Draco hissed to Snape. "These questions were practically written for them!"

 

" _Practically_." Snape said in such a way that revealed he shared Draco's opinion. "This will be over quickly- we'll have to assume they know all the answers. As soon as a question is read, don't hesitate, click-in."

 

"And it looks like Professors Snape and Malfoy are having a little pep-talk." Fred said. "We'll find out if it does them any good on question five."

 

"Ahem, The bone from this winged creature is said to bring good luck-" Fred said. Green and silver sparks showered over Snape's dark form. "An answer? But I wasn't finished."

 

"Hippogriff." Snape said ignoring his protest.

 

Fred looked to George searchingly, who shrugged.

 

"He's not wrong." Fred said suspiciously. "How did you-?"

 

"Lucky guess." Snape replied silkily. He locked gazes with Sirius Black who was tight-jawed and looked as if he was biting his tongue.

 

"That's quite a lucky guess, don't you think Professor McGonagall?" Fred said looking back at her.

 

The Slytherin stands were booing at the twins.

 

"Point! Point! Point!" The Slytherin's chanted.

 

"He's not cheating." McGonagall assured everyone. She waved her wand at the scoreboard and "2" appeared under the Slytherin section, much to the Slytherin's glee.

 

George pulled the next question card but was sure to turn his body away from Snape.

 

"Question six: This single sang by The Weird Sister's topped the charts three weeks after releasing Christmas day."

 

As soon as Draco saw George's lips stop moving he clicked his buzzer. He beat Harry who was looking vexed when Draco's sparks flew.

 

"Your answer, Malfoy?" Fred said.

 

"Professor Malfoy!" Draco corrected him.

 

"I'm afraid that's wrong-" Fred replied happily.

 

"That's not my answer you twit!" Draco snarled. The booing from Slytherin was back again. "The song is, 'Broomsticks on my Doorstep, Magic in My Mind'."

 

"Your second answer is a right answer but unfortunately we can't give it to- hey!" Fred blurted out.

 

McGonagall, living up to her reputation of being fair, had already put the point on the scoreboard for Slytherin.

 

"Looks as if we've been over-ruled and Slytherin scores yet again." George said bitterly. “The score is three-to-three. Question seven: If you chant the spell, ‘ _Meteolojinx Recanto_ ’ what can you expect to happen?”

 

Draco must have been a millisecond too slow. Harry had gotten to his buzzer first.

 

“Harry, ‘Meteolojinx Recanto’ does what?” Fred asked him enthusiastically.

 

“It counters a spell that affects the weather.” Harry replied.

 

“Correct!” Fred announced. "Four-to-three, Gryffindor's in the lead- one more correct answer for Gryffindor to take the win!"

 

Red and gold confetti showered all four contestants. Snape was picking bits of it out of his hair with an ugly scowl. The Potter banners were trembling in the stands as most of the student body rooted for Harry.

 

A jolt of determination gripped Draco, he had decided to press the buzzer, even if he didn’t immediately know the answer.

 

“Question eight: This illness causes the infected to have a green tinge-”

 

“DRAGON POX!” Draco boomed while his sparks flew. “The answer is dragon pox!”

 

“And Malfoy spazzes for another point.” George said. “Slytherin makes an unbelievable comeback, by answering another question before it's been read- it's a comeback so unbelievable it’s hardly believable- no? Nothing?” George said shifting his gaze to McGonagall.

 

“They’re not cheating.” McGonagall said in a finalized tone. "I would know."

 

"And the score is four-to-four." George sighed. "This last question will determine the winner."

 

“We got a tough one for the tie-breaker." Fred announced. "Answers before the entire question has been read will not be accepted.” He said looking at Snape and Draco. “Question nine...These two muggle brothers are known as the ‘pioneers of flight’, inventing a primitive version of the machine called the ‘airplane’.” Fred said. He was looking at Harry expectantly who was pressing his buzzer.

 

“ _Bloody cheaters with their fucking muggle-questions!_ ” Draco thought angrily. He threw his buzzer to the ground so hard it bounced and cracked into pieces on the platform.

 

But it wasn’t Harry’s sparks that flew. Draco’s dread eased into confusion and excitement as he saw the emerald and silver embers dive into the air. Fred’s smile stiffened on his face as he took a tentative step towards Snape.

 

“Professor Snape has a guess…” Fred said into the microphone. “Or was that just a misfire? Happens sometimes at your age, Professor-”

 

“-Wilbur and Orville Wright.” Snape interrupted Fred with a nasty smile.

 

“That….” Fred said as he looked down at his answer card. “He’s right.” Fred said in a state of shock. “I thought only freaks like dad would know that.”

 

“The Slytherins won.” George replied, though from his tone it sounded mildly like another question.

 

All the sound had been sucked out of the stadium. Harry and Sirius stood together looking as nauseous as if a Weasley twin had announced their penalty for losing was to kiss Snape. Draco was first to break the mad silence with a whoop of triumph.

 

“YES!” Draco shouted, his fists pumping the air. “How’s the taste of failure, Potter!?” He shouted, pointing at Harry. The Slytherin stands burst with similar jaunts and congratulatory shouts.

 

Snape was grinning as Sirius stared at him.

 

“You cheated.” Sirius accused Snape. “You had to- you wouldn’t know anything about muggles!”

 

Snape didn’t answer Black’s accusation, instead he began to laugh.

 

“There you have it folks,” Fred said solemnly to the stunned crowd. “You win some, you lose some, and sometimes you lose to a slimy, Slytherin git with a secret passion for muggle history-”

 

The microphone was being wrestled away from Fred and George again as the noisy scuffle reverberated off the field.

 

“This event is brought to you by Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes located in Diagon Alley-” George (or Fred) managed to gasp quickly into the mic before McGonagall cut it off dead.

 

The Slytherins were coming onto the field in a large group and climbing up the platform. Draco felt himself being hoisted into the air as they cheered.

 

A group of poor idiots had made the bad decision to try to include Snape in the aerial celebration. A pile of students had been subjected to his body-binding hexes and were laying at his feet muttering their apologies as he pointed his wand at any person who seemed stupid enough to try to touch him.

 

Hermione had joined the celebrating crowd and was trying to speak to Draco as the Slytherins moved him around in his personal crowd-surf. He couldn't hear her very well, but she was giving a smile full of pride. Draco thought she couldn’t have looked more beautiful. It was testament to how she had given her heart to him, after all, she had chosen to rush to his side and congratulate him instead of wallowing in the gloom that was sticking to the Gryffindors over Harry Potter’s loss.

 

"Hip-hip-HOORAY!" The Slytherin's yelled tossing Draco in the air. They repeated the action once more.

 

On the third toss in the air Draco caught sight of an disturbing sight.

 

Hidden under the Hufflepuff box stairwell was what looked like a goblin, only it was too tall. Draco saw stoney-grey colored skin over lithe, taut muscle. He was able to capture a few features highlighted in his mind on the brief encounter- one was the odd creature had colorless, pale irises, the other, upon initial glance, was what Draco had mistaken for white tattooes were actually fleshy, ebony scars. The expression on it’s hardened face was something between a smile and a snarl, and it moved quickly into a dark pocket in the crowd as Draco drank-in the odd encounter.

 

If he hadn’t been tossed into the air he doubted he would have even seen the haunched, imposing figure.

 

“Put me down!” Draco shouted in alarm. But his audience was getting too carried away and hadn’t heard him. He whipped his body wildly to communicate his displeasure of being held in the air.

 

Saxby was holding up his left leg and got a kick in face, he dropped on the ground and Draco managed to slide on his feet.

 

Hermione had noticed Draco’s upset and was running to his side. Her confusion turned to alarm as she spotted Draco taking out his wand. He jumped off the platform and sprinted to the darkened corner of the Hufflepuff stands.

 

It was gone.

 

_Did it run into the Forbidden Forest?_

 

The Quidditch stadium was in a large field with very little places to hide outside of the stadium itself. The creature would have to run several yards in the open to make it back to the Forest undetected.

 

Draco felt like an arse as the cheers echoed off the field. How could he get carried away by a stupid _game_ when he knew Hogwarts security was being threatened? If Black or Potter or even his father could remember what was breaking the security wards, would they even consider participating in some stupid quiz-show instead of getting to the bottom of it?

 

“What is it? What’s wrong?” Hermione asked. He was scanning the crowd vigorously and she began to follow his gaze.

 

“It’s worse.” Draco told her. “It’s out of the Forest now.”

 

 


End file.
